Yes your words mean so much to me,by pointing out my misunderstandings i learn so much.
I guess it is because i have no personal connections with any devotees,and for that reason i put so much importance of finding a Guru so i can be in proper association. But as you pointed out its not about "shopping" for a guru,i really need to take my time with this.
I have 2 more questions now that this has been brought to my attention:
1)can a person who really wants to be a devotee of Sri Sri Radha Krsna chant the mahamantra on tulasi beads even though he hasn;t received initiation?
2) Is the teachings of Acharyas considered siska guru in the sense they instruct one on how to perform proper devotional service?