Off-topicat :-)

[Guest guest]

Hi Guys,

 

No doubt there are many experienced cat-lovers in this forum so here comes the question:

How to prevent a company-cat who finally found company from showing

affection by bringing mice? Being rather fat, she doesn't eat them,

the mice are often alive and badly wounded. Offering more food, in

order to make her fatter and slower still, didn't work out yet -

affection only increased as did the number of caught mice

 

Jan

Attachment: (image/jpeg) x.jpg [not stored]

[Guest guest]

what a cute cat! alas--tis the nature of

cats to catch mice and other such things--

no matter how well fed they may be--

and if they didn't we might be overrun by

them--one theory is the bubonic plague of

the 14th(?) century--the one that wiped out

a quarter of europe's population was so devastating

because of a dearth of cats...i had a cat once that was such a mighty

hunter that she used to bring live half grown rabbits(anything

more bloodcurdling than a frightened rabbit's scream

cannot be imagined) and large birds into the house, and we

had to rescue them--mice are so small they are usually

beyond help--if you can control her access in and out,

don't let her in if there's anything in her mouth!

My current family of cats deposit their catches

on my doorstep....which is the proper cat thing

to do..there was a study in england where all

the people in a village bagged their cats' catches and

saved them for the researchers--amazing the large number

of mice and such one village of cats could dispatch.

Nora

[Guest guest]

Dear jb,

Jan, I have this info on the authority of none other than Desmond

Morris, of Naked Ape fame. The cat has adopted you and therefore

regards you as her mother. This is why the mice are brought home to

you, to show you her skills at hunting. Cats will play with their

prey as a completely separate instinct from hunger or the need to

kill them. It may be possible that belling the cat with a bell or

some noisemaker on a collar, will reduce her ability to capture the

mice. She is likely to feel highly offended by your lack of

appreciation for her gifts.

Love, Glo

- jb

NondualitySalon

Tuesday, December 05, 2000 12:48 PM

Off-topicat :-)

Hi Guys,

No doubt there are many experienced cat-lovers in this forum so here comes the question:

How to prevent a company-cat who finally found company from showing

affection by bringing mice? Being rather fat, she doesn't eat them,

the mice are often alive and badly wounded. Offering more food, in

order to make her fatter and slower still, didn't work out yet -

affection only increased as did the number of caught mice

Jan

// All paths go

somewhere. No path goes nowhere. Paths, places, sights, perceptions,

and indeed all experiences arise from and exist in and subside back

into the Space of Awareness. Like waves rising are not different than

the ocean, all things arising from Awareness are of the nature of

Awareness. Awareness does not come and go but is always Present. It

is Home. Home is where the Heart Is. Jnanis know the Heart to be the

Finality of Eternal Being. A true devotee relishes in the Truth of

Self-Knowledge, spontaneously arising from within into It Self.

Welcome all to a.To from this list, go to

the ONElist web site, at www., and

select the User Center link from the menu bar on

the left. This menu will also let you change your subscription

between digest and normal mode.

Attachment: (image/jpeg) x.jpg [not stored]

[Guest guest]

Hi Nora,

 

More or less it was suspected that the cat's behavior cannot be modified but one

never knows...

She was allowed on the terrain because she catches the mice, who are

considered rather unwanted guests at the plantation. In that case, some of the

mice

are rather fortunate now, as when they still are showing signs of life, I divert

the cat's attention

to food. She will drop the mouse under my chair (outside) and start eating,

while I transport the mouse

to a place where the cat can't come and until now, the mice that were alive,

could manage to get

away from there. Of course the cat, after her meal, is highly surprised to find

the mouse gone

A canary she will never catch though - they are too fast...

 

 

Jan

[Guest guest]

On 12/5/00 at 11:11 AM Wim Borsboom wrote:

 

ºDear Jan,

º

ºIt is very simple,

ºGet rid of the mice in another way.

º

ºWim

 

But I don't have to get rid of the mice, they aren't a problem - except when

occasionally, I don't see the "gift" and things start to get smelly at the

terrace

 

Jan

[Guest guest]

Dear Jan,

 

It is very simple,

Get rid of the mice in another way.

 

Wim

[Guest guest]

On 12/5/00 at 1:59 PM Gloria Lee wrote:

Dear jb,

 

Jan, I have this info on the authority of none other than Desmond

Morris, of Naked Ape fame. The cat has adopted you and therefore

regards you as her mother. This is why the mice are brought home to

you, to show you her skills at hunting. Cats will play with their

prey as a completely separate instinct from hunger or the need to

kill them. It may be possible that belling the cat with a bell or

some noisemaker on a collar, will reduce her ability to capture the

mice. She is likely to feel highly offended by your lack of

appreciation for her gifts.

 

Love, Glo

 

Oops - I didn't know that cats behave that way, especially that she

would feel offended when refusing the gift.. Having diverted her

attention often with food is probably right after all... The cat is

quite alone and cats usually are kept outside. Being confined to the

house, sitting on the terrace probably has been interpreted as

company by her... And that will change when on two feet again. A

collar with a bell is a great tip, I'll buy one as soon as the foot

allows going again.

 

Love,

Jan

[Guest guest]

Jan,

 

You wrote:

> But I don't have to get rid of the mice,

> they aren't a problem - except when

> occasionally, I don't see the "gift" and

> things start to get smelly at the terrace

 

Then what is the problem?

 

What is that foot doing in the cast?

Is that your foot?

Is that recent?

 

Wim

[Guest guest]

On 12/5/00 at 11:40 AM Wim Borsboom wrote:

 

ºJan,

º

ºYou wrote:

º> But I don't have to get rid of the mice,

º> they aren't a problem - except when

º> occasionally, I don't see the "gift" and

º> things start to get smelly at the terrace

º

ºThen what is the problem?

 

Decaying corpses near the house - with the climate here, it isn't recommended.

º

ºWhat is that foot doing in the cast?

ºIs that your foot?

ºIs that recent?

º

ºWim

 

Yes, it's my foot and the cast is about a week old - high speed slide with the

scooter. Ankle broken, mid-foot fractures and all muscles and ligaments got

quite a blow as well.

 

Jan

[Guest guest]

Hi JB,

I recommend getting a good Shroedinger's box. You can probably

pick one up for peanuts at a quantum mechanic's shop. I was originally

going to suggest killing the cat, but you probably would object to that.

BUT, if you put the cat in the Shroedinger's box, you will never know (unless

you open the lid again) whether or not the cat dies, but the mice will

remain safe. (unless the cat tunnels out, so don't give the damn cat a

cake, okay?)

yes, that is my recommendation.

yours, Mark

jb wrote:

Hi Guys, No

doubt there are many experienced cat-lovers in this forum so here comes

the question:How to prevent a company-cat

who finally found company from showing affection by bringing mice? Being

rather fat, she doesn't eat them, the mice are often alive and badly wounded.

Offering more food, in order to make her fatter and slower still, didn't

work out yet - affection only increased as did the number of caught mice

Jan

//

All paths go somewhere. No path goes nowhere. Paths, places, sights,

perceptions, and indeed all experiences arise from and exist in and subside

back into the Space of Awareness. Like waves rising are not different than

the ocean, all things arising from Awareness are of the nature of Awareness.

Awareness does not come and go but is always Present. It is Home. Home

is where the Heart Is. Jnanis know the Heart to be the Finality of Eternal

Being. A true devotee relishes in the Truth of Self-Knowledge, spontaneously

arising from within into It Self. Welcome all to a.

To from this list, go to the ONElist web site, at

www., and select the User Center link from the menu bar

on the left. This menu will also let you change your subscription

between digest and normal mode.

Attachment: (image/jpeg) x.jpg [not stored]

Attachment: (image/gif) C:\windows\TEMP\nsmail33.gif [not stored]

[Guest guest]

On 12/5/00 at 4:00 PM Mark Otter wrote:

Hi JB, I recommend getting a good Shroedinger's box. You can probably

pick one up for peanuts at a quantum mechanic's shop. I was

originally going to suggest killing the cat, but you probably would

object to that. BUT, if you put the cat in the Shroedinger's box,

you will never know (unless you open the lid again) whether or not

the cat dies, but the mice will remain safe. (unless the cat tunnels

out, so don't give the damn cat a cake, okay?) yes, that is my

recommendation. yours, Mark Thanks Mark - the funny thing is, thanks

to all responses, I came up, at least in theory, with a solution: a

small device, intermittently transmitting "unpleasant" ultrasonic

pulses. Mice are pretty sensitive to that and they would even be

warned when a bell would remain silent... With such a device, working

in a different part of the spectrum, whales could be chased away

before the hunters are near enough The equivalent of the

Schrödinger box for mice would be to resume "life as usual"...

But if anything, it shows that a triviality like breaking a foot can

lead to being confronted with "Ahimsa in practice".

Jan

[Guest guest]

Well, certainly annoying the hell out of the cat is probably better than

putting it in a box. Do you have a problem with whales as well? Maybe

you should just move.... (just kidding - actually I'm trying to take

over your kitchen before all them babes start showing up for the

chocolate...) oh golly, I'd better go do some work, or I may get

fired....oops too late.

 

yup,

Mark

 

jb wrote:

> On 12/5/00 at 4:00 PM Mark Otter wrote:

>

> Hi JB,

>

> I recommend getting a good Shroedinger's box. You can

> probably pick one up for peanuts at a quantum mechanic's

> shop. I was originally going to suggest killing the cat,

> but you probably would object to that. BUT, if you put the

> cat in the Shroedinger's box, you will never know (unless

> you open the lid again) whether or not the cat dies, but the

> mice will remain safe. (unless the cat tunnels out, so don't

> give the damn cat a cake, okay?)

>

> yes, that is my recommendation.

>

> yours, Mark

>

> Thanks Mark - the funny thing is, thanks to all responses, I

> came up, at least in theory, with a solution: a small

> device, intermittently transmitting "unpleasant" ultrasonic

> pulses. Mice are pretty sensitive to that and they would

> even be warned when a bell would remain silent... With such

> a device, working in a different part of the spectrum,

> whales could be chased away before the hunters are near

> enough The equivalent of the Schrödinger box for mice

> would be to resume "life as usual"...

>

> But if anything, it shows that a triviality like breaking a

> foot can lead to being confronted with "Ahimsa in practice".

>

> Jan

>

>

>

>

> eGroups Sponsor

[Click Here!]

>

> //

>

> All paths go somewhere. No path goes nowhere. Paths, places, sights,

> perceptions, and indeed all experiences arise from and exist in and

> subside back into the Space of Awareness. Like waves rising are not

> different than the ocean, all things arising from Awareness are of the

> nature of Awareness. Awareness does not come and go but is always

> Present. It is Home. Home is where the Heart Is. Jnanis know the Heart

> to be the Finality of Eternal Being. A true devotee relishes in the

> Truth of Self-Knowledge, spontaneously arising from within into It

> Self. Welcome all to a.

>

> To from this list, go to the ONElist web site, at

> www., and select the User Center link

> from the menu bar

> on the left. This menu will also let you change

> your subscription

> between digest and normal mode.

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Isn't it Greenpeace that's having a problem with whales getting extinct? Perhaps

a device as proposed is something for them...

Taking over not just the kitchen but the entire house would be a piece of cake -

doors aren't locked and on one foot one is rather helpless )

 

 

Jan

 

 

On 12/5/00 at 4:44 PM Mark Otter wrote:

 

ºWell, certainly annoying the hell out of the cat is probably better than

ºputting it in a box. Do you have a problem with whales as well? Maybe

ºyou should just move.... (just kidding - actually I'm trying to take

ºover your kitchen before all them babes start showing up for the

ºchocolate...) oh golly, I'd better go do some work, or I may get

ºfired....oops too late.

º

ºyup,

ºMark

º

º

[Guest guest]

Hmmmm... Well, I would start by drugging the chocolate to be sure you

are really incapacitated, as I hear you are still climbing mountains in

spite of your crippling affliction (hey, cool, have you ever had a

crippling affliction before? kinda neat, huh?) How Dickensian. Then

what would my evil master plan have me do next? Well, I dunno, because

right off the bat as I was stepping off the bat (no, I am not accusing

you of having a bat problem in addition to your whale and mice problems

- gosh after calling you a cripple, I sort of hate to keep mentioning

problems... I was trying to indicate my mode of travel...)Well, anyway

right off the bat, I got bowled over by your attack cat. Yikes, with

all the killing going on down there, I'm not coming anywhere near the

place. You should warn people!!! HEY GIRLS!! forget about having Jan's

chocolate - he's got an attack cat!!!! you could get killed. By the

way, how did you teach your cat to bowl? Don't you need an opposable

thumb to bowl?

 

of course if I did manage to get past the cat, I could drug the

chocolate, we could set it out for the mice and enjoy a nice glass of

ice tea together.... hey, got any chocolate to go with our ice tea?

damn, this is one dangerous trip.

 

well, Jan, have a nice life all alone in your own private hell, with

tainted chocolate and dangerous attack mammals. No wonder the mail

takes so long to get to you. the postmen keep disappearing... oh, that

and the fact that I haven't put the paper in the mail yet. sorry. I'd

have done that ages ago, but I spend all my time composing nonsense for

some email list or other and never do any work here... damn still fired!

(and not one whit closer to being sane either.)

 

Love, Mark

ps could you step on the mice with that cast of yours? Oh, I see, you

DON'T want the mice to die. never mind. I had mice once. I moved.

(really)

 

jb wrote:

> Isn't it Greenpeace that's having a problem with whales getting

> extinct? Perhaps a device as proposed is something for them...

> Taking over not just the kitchen but the entire house would be a piece

> of cake - doors aren't locked and on one foot one is rather helpless

> )

>

>

> Jan

>

>

> On 12/5/00 at 4:44 PM Mark Otter wrote:

>

> ºWell, certainly annoying the hell out of the cat is probably better

> than

> ºputting it in a box. Do you have a problem with whales as well?

> Maybe

> ºyou should just move.... (just kidding - actually I'm trying to take

> ºover your kitchen before all them babes start showing up for the

> ºchocolate...) oh golly, I'd better go do some work, or I may get

> ºfired....oops too late.

> º

> ºyup,

> ºMark

> º

> º

>

>

> eGroups Sponsor

[Click Here!]

>

> //

>

> All paths go somewhere. No path goes nowhere. Paths, places, sights,

> perceptions, and indeed all experiences arise from and exist in and

> subside back into the Space of Awareness. Like waves rising are not

> different than the ocean, all things arising from Awareness are of the

> nature of Awareness. Awareness does not come and go but is always

> Present. It is Home. Home is where the Heart Is. Jnanis know the Heart

> to be the Finality of Eternal Being. A true devotee relishes in the

> Truth of Self-Knowledge, spontaneously arising from within into It

> Self. Welcome all to a.

>

> To from this list, go to the ONElist web site, at

> www., and select the User Center link

> from the menu bar

> on the left. This menu will also let you change

> your subscription

> between digest and normal mode.

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

On 12/5/00 at 5:45 PM Mark Otter wrote:

 

ºHmmmm... Well, I would start by drugging the chocolate to be sure you

ºare really incapacitated, as I hear you are still climbing mountains in

ºspite of your crippling affliction (hey, cool, have you ever had a

ºcrippling affliction before?

 

Oh yes - I have been running for quite some years and often, the physiotherapist

ordered

complete rest - so instead of running I went on a workout with the bicycle

 

 

kinda neat, huh?) How Dickensian. Then

ºwhat would my evil master plan have me do next? Well, I dunno, because

ºright off the bat as I was stepping off the bat (no, I am not accusing

ºyou of having a bat problem in addition to your whale and mice problems

 

No bats here - occasionally, an owl that seems to be lost

 

º- gosh after calling you a cripple, I sort of hate to keep mentioning

ºproblems... I was trying to indicate my mode of travel...)Well, anyway

ºright off the bat, I got bowled over by your attack cat. Yikes, with

ºall the killing going on down there, I'm not coming anywhere near the

ºplace. You should warn people!!! HEY GIRLS!! forget about having Jan's

ºchocolate - he's got an attack cat!!!! you could get killed. By the

ºway, how did you teach your cat to bowl? Don't you need an opposable

ºthumb to bowl?

 

With the cat it's quite simple: keep the face at least one yard away from her

She has a natural talent for bowling - and occasionally, she is practicing

with the wild tomatoes from the garden - quite an expert.

º

ºof course if I did manage to get past the cat, I could drug the

ºchocolate, we could set it out for the mice and enjoy a nice glass of

ºice tea together.... hey, got any chocolate to go with our ice tea?

ºdamn, this is one dangerous trip.

 

As dangerous as one wishes - on this island one has the rare opportunity to get

lost

while hiking although the road to civilization is less then 300 yards away...

But a box

of chocolate, a bottle of water and warm cloths do minimize that risk

º

ºwell, Jan, have a nice life all alone in your own private hell, with

ºtainted chocolate and dangerous attack mammals. No wonder the mail

ºtakes so long to get to you. the postmen keep disappearing... oh, that

ºand the fact that I haven't put the paper in the mail yet. sorry. I'd

ºhave done that ages ago, but I spend all my time composing nonsense for

ºsome email list or other and never do any work here... damn still fired!

º(and not one whit closer to being sane either.)

 

With the mail, it is a double delay. Not only the postmen are disappearing

(economized away) but the mail

disappears as well - and sometimes appears at a different address But if the

mail is containing valuables, it "just"

disappears

º

ºLove, Mark

ºps could you step on the mice with that cast of yours? Oh, I see, you

ºDON'T want the mice to die. never mind. I had mice once. I moved.

º(really)

 

Only a dead mouse could be stepped on - the cast would survive that though

Wasn't there something like a non-lethal trap when you had mice?

Such a contraption is an easy DIY project - and it's easier than moving )

 

Love,

Jan

 

 

º

[Guest guest]

Hi Mark and Jan.

> (unless the cat tunnels out, so don't give the damn cat a

> cake, okay?)

 

That about the cake is right with Jan's cat, I think. Hhmmmm?

Of course Schroedinger's cat can eat his cake and have it too.

Ah, now I know!

Jan..., your cat is experimenting with quantum mechanics. Are you sure

he did not read about Schroedinger's thought experiments. He is trying

to eat the mice and have them too.

The cat is out of the bag, with a quantum jump. You are observing an

evolutionary stage in the developments of cats, your cat is at the

pinnacle of its development...

You need to cultivate more mice so that your cat can get on with it.

 

Wim

[Guest guest]

On 12/5/00 at 4:54 PM Wim Borsboom wrote:

 

ºHi Mark and Jan.

º

º> (unless the cat tunnels out, so don't give the damn cat a

º> cake, okay?)

º

ºThat about the cake is right with Jan's cat, I think. Hhmmmm?

ºOf course Schroedinger's cat can eat his cake and have it too.

ºAh, now I know!

ºJan..., your cat is experimenting with quantum mechanics. Are you sure

ºhe did not read about Schroedinger's thought experiments. He is trying

ºto eat the mice and have them too.

ºThe cat is out of the bag, with a quantum jump. You are observing an

ºevolutionary stage in the developments of cats, your cat is at the

ºpinnacle of its development...

ºYou need to cultivate more mice so that your cat can get on with it.

º

ºWim

 

Some of the mice are getting a crash course in advanced quantum physics; those

that still are alive when brought to me are saved because nice food is offered

to the cat and she drops the mouse, who will lie motionless as if paralyzed.

Carefully, the mouse is transported to a place, out of reach for the cat and

when returning after about half an hour, to see what happened to the mouse,

until now it was gone - tunneled through hyperspace to the mice planet... When

after finishing her copious meal, the cat remembers the mouse again, she is too

surprised to find it gone - the mouse's jump through hyperspace must have

changed her memory simultaneously. Instead of looking around, she will sniff at

the spot the mouse was put on the ground and then, cast a glance at the sky,

with a look, conveying "gone up in smoke". Which actually could be true with a

transporter malfunctioning

 

Jan

[Guest guest]

mark.otter writes:

>...Well, anyway right off the bat, I got bowled over by your attack cat.

>Yikes, with all the killing going on down there, I'm not coming anywhere

near the

>place. You should warn people!!! HEY GIRLS!! forget about having Jan's

>chocolate - he's got an attack cat!!!! you could get killed. By the

>way, how did you teach your cat to bowl? Don't you need an opposable

>thumb to bowl?...

 

Um... Mark - did you go off of your medication again?? Please see me

after class.

 

And are you trying to pull that boat scam again? Folks, he really has a

46' yacht anchored off the coast of his own island... and he bought all of

this by preying upon kindhearted but naive people in email Satsanghs

across the world. So folks, humor him if you must, but don't send him

cash. Instead, if you believe him and want to help him out, send him a

whole boat (just slap a few stamps on it and it will go through the mail

just fine). He should be able to use it as a skiff for his yacht. And send

your cash to me... I've got this great investment opportunity... Invest in

the "Mouse-B-Safe" silent ultrasonic solar-powered cat collar (available

in the regular version, or the just released, half-off Schrodingers model).

Although it has the unfortunate effect of acting as a dog-whistle, it

will do wonders for your cats' cardiovascular systems.

 

Happy Holidays/Solstice, everyone. Be peaceful-

 

Mike

 

------------

Cat Haiku (Author Unknown)

 

You never feed me.

Perhaps I'll sleep on your face.

That will sure show you.

 

You must scratch me there!

Yes, above my tail!

Behold, elevator butt.

 

The rule for today

Touch my tail, I shred your hand.

New rule tomorrow.

 

In deep sleep hear sound

cat vomit hairball somewhere

will find in morning.

 

Grace personified.

I leap into the window.

I meant to do that.

 

Blur of motion, then --

silence, me, a paper bag.

What is so funny?

 

The mighty hunter

Returns with gifts of plump birds --

Your foot just squashed one.

 

You're always typing.

Well, let's see you ignore my

sitting on your hands.

 

My small cardboard box.

You cannot see me if I

can just hide my head.

 

Terrible battle.

I fought for hours. Come and see!

What's a 'term paper'?

 

Kitty likes plastic

Confuses for litter box

Don't leave tarp around

 

Small brave carnivores

Kill pine cones and mosquitoes

Fear vacuum cleaner

 

I want to be close

to you. Can I fit my head

inside your armpit?

 

Wanna go outside.

Oh, shit! Help! I got outside!

Let me back inside!

 

Oh no! Big One

has been trapped by newspaper!

Cat to the rescue!

 

Humans are so strange.

Mine lies still in bed, then screams

My claws are not that sharp.

 

Cats meow out of angst

"Thumbs! If only we had thumbs!

We could break so much!"

 

Litter box not here

You must have moved it again

I'll crap in the sink

 

The Big Ones snore now

Every room is dark and cold

Time for "Cup Hockey"

 

We're almost equals

I purr to show I love you

Want to smell my butt?

[Guest guest]

Mike,

 

you are a silly man, but a talented poet.

 

Love, Mark

oh wait, I'm projecting again.

 

UnbrknCh8n wrote:

>

> mark.otter writes:

>

> >...Well, anyway right off the bat, I got bowled over by your attack

> cat.

> >Yikes, with all the killing going on down there, I'm not coming

> anywhere

> near the

> >place. You should warn people!!! HEY GIRLS!! forget about having

> Jan's

> >chocolate - he's got an attack cat!!!! you could get killed. By the

> >way, how did you teach your cat to bowl? Don't you need an opposable

>

> >thumb to bowl?...

>

> Um... Mark - did you go off of your medication again?? Please see me

> after class.

>

> And are you trying to pull that boat scam again? Folks, he really has

> a

> 46' yacht anchored off the coast of his own island... and he bought

> all of

> this by preying upon kindhearted but naive people in email Satsanghs

> across the world. So folks, humor him if you must, but don't send him

>

> cash. Instead, if you believe him and want to help him out, send him

> a

> whole boat (just slap a few stamps on it and it will go through the

> mail

> just fine). He should be able to use it as a skiff for his yacht.

> And send

> your cash to me... I've got this great investment opportunity...

> Invest in

> the "Mouse-B-Safe" silent ultrasonic solar-powered cat collar

> (available

> in the regular version, or the just released, half-off Schrodingers

> model).

> Although it has the unfortunate effect of acting as a dog-whistle, it

> will do wonders for your cats' cardiovascular systems.

>

> Happy Holidays/Solstice, everyone. Be peaceful-

>

> Mike

>

> ------------

> Cat Haiku (Author Unknown)

>

> You never feed me.

> Perhaps I'll sleep on your face.

> That will sure show you.

>

> You must scratch me there!

> Yes, above my tail!

> Behold, elevator butt.

>

> The rule for today

> Touch my tail, I shred your hand.

> New rule tomorrow.

>

> In deep sleep hear sound

> cat vomit hairball somewhere

> will find in morning.

>

> Grace personified.

> I leap into the window.

> I meant to do that.

>

> Blur of motion, then --

> silence, me, a paper bag.

> What is so funny?

>

> The mighty hunter

> Returns with gifts of plump birds --

> Your foot just squashed one.

>

> You're always typing.

> Well, let's see you ignore my

> sitting on your hands.

>

> My small cardboard box.

> You cannot see me if I

> can just hide my head.

>

> Terrible battle.

> I fought for hours. Come and see!

> What's a 'term paper'?

>

> Kitty likes plastic

> Confuses for litter box

> Don't leave tarp around

>

> Small brave carnivores

> Kill pine cones and mosquitoes

> Fear vacuum cleaner

>

> I want to be close

> to you. Can I fit my head

> inside your armpit?

>

> Wanna go outside.

> Oh, shit! Help! I got outside!

> Let me back inside!

>

> Oh no! Big One

> has been trapped by newspaper!

> Cat to the rescue!

>

> Humans are so strange.

> Mine lies still in bed, then screams

> My claws are not that sharp.

>

> Cats meow out of angst

> "Thumbs! If only we had thumbs!

> We could break so much!"

>

> Litter box not here

> You must have moved it again

> I'll crap in the sink

>

> The Big Ones snore now

> Every room is dark and cold

> Time for "Cup Hockey"

>

> We're almost equals

> I purr to show I love you

> Want to smell my butt?