Love is.....

[Guest guest]

Dear Judi,

 

You wrote:

> Well, it's like this, love and surrender are synonomous. (sic)

 

Try, please try to be precise Judi, a person knowing something about

unconditional love would not say it that way, could not say it that way.

 

Try the following:

If love and surrender are synonymous, are unconditional love and

unconditional surrender also synonymous.

A person who surrenders unconditionally might not be very close to love yet,

maybe closer to defeat and the grief that comes with it.

I know there are all sorts of nuances in the meaning of the word surrender',

well, that being so... you then cannot just make a blanket statement such as

'love and surrender are synonymous'.

I have a client who equates love with the fear of losing attachment to a

co-dependent, needy and manipulative relationship. She is fully convinced of

that, she thinks that all people in the world consider love to be that way.

That is an illness, pathological. To more or less equate love to surrender

is just as unhealthy. That we encounter those two words often in the same

paragraph of the writings of people who write about love, does not make them

synonymous. Thos two words might just be wrongly and inappropriately linked

through unfortunate circumstances in life.

When data base tables are linked incorrectly the answer to a query may be

logically (program logic) correctly associated but reasonably wrong.

 

I'm not trying to be unduly critical here, but I would like you to learn to

use your words and expressions better, you are not too good at using them.

This is friendly advice, well meant. It may not be what you want, that's why

you get it for free.

All this would not matter if you did not claim to be what your web pages

express, you even invite people to join your egroup, well you better be good

at semantics... That is what the medium of email is about... No matter how

you cut it, it is through the written word that you attempt communication.

You cannot afford to shoot off words and expressions as though you were

shooting from the hip. You may want to give your egroup a country & western

cowboy like, ranchy flavour, there is a certain freshness to it, but the way

you express yourself so absolutely black-and-whitely may not be as effective

as you wish. This is not about a theme park.

 

So, to repeat, you cannot just make a blanket statement such as 'love and

surrender are synonymous.'

Of course they are not... hopefully surrender will let somebody discover

that love was already unconditional, but that person could also discover

that the surrender (especially when unconditional) could lead to homicide

(or on a grander scale... genocide).

If anything, surrender is part of a recovery process, surrender can lead to

the recovery of primordial, eternal and universal love.

 

Take good care of words.

 

Words, words, words, better not use them if they are not used properly.

 

You wrote:

> You wanted to know what "it" is and what is "impossible".

> The answer on both accounts is love.

> I'll leave you to do the math.

 

No Judi, you cannot wriggle yourself out of that one. I only asked you to

clarify your sentence which was all botched up.

When you write, do not leave the interpretation hanging in the air, write

what you mean, write your truth. Or are you trying your hand at a new form

of koan, ranch style?

 

Oh, and there is no math involved in unconditional love...

Words, words, words and now you want numbers as well, I bet you they won't

add up....

 

So what did YOU mean when you said IT IS IMPOSSIBLE.

Clarify that to yourself Judi.

 

Love, Wim

 

PS. I will cool it after this, Judi.