RE: [NDS] Jan/Q.1. What does Nisagardatta mean by ...

[Guest guest]

harsha-hkl writes:

>Don't be bothered by other people's opinions Jan. It is enough that you are

>bothered by your own! :-). Sages, who see to the heart of the matter become

>very gentle even with themselves.

 

Hello Harsha (and other friends)-

 

Thanks for the reminder. This brings to mind a little something I wrote a

while back (for an email newsletter I put out) that I feel moved to share.

It is interesting to me how even as I "progress" spiritually (if I can use

such

a loaded word) by letting go of more attachments and ego constructs I am

still often confronted with my need for external acknowledgment and

acceptance. However, I am more easily gently letting go of the need for

such reinforcement by reminding myself of what fuels this desire (a lack of

self-love and self-acceptance, as well as fear stoking the illusory fire of

separation).

 

Namasté, all-

 

Mike

-------

 

Playing the Music of Life:

 

Life is like playing a violin solo in public and learning the instrument as

one goes on.

-Edward Bulwer-Lytton

 

Ahhh, how true this quote is. Yes, this is indeed what life is like. But if

this is the case why do so many of us feel that our lives should appear to

be polished, mistake-free performances?

 

When learning to play a musical instrument, mistakes are an inevitable

part of the process. Mistakes do not indicate failure, but instead are a

step on the path of learning.

 

By the same token, mistakes are a part of the rest of life, as well.

A person who makes very few mistakes is a person who isn't doing much

living. True, if I sit inside all day watching TV I will make few mistakes,

but I also won't be living much of a life.

 

Part of living life is trying new things, going new places, challenging

myself to experience new situations. An expected part of this is that I

will occasionally stumble, make an error, or embarrass myself. Fear of

doing this has frequently kept me from trying new things, but this fear is

gradually subsiding as I am slowly increasing my capacity to live with

my own mistakes.

 

The first step in allowing myself the liberty to be human and make

mistakes is to really accept that (in spite of what the media portray) it

is not possible to live a life free of errors, miscalculations or occasional

lapses in judgment. This is part of the human experience, and to think

otherwise would suggest I have very poor observational skills.

 

Second, I have to remember that I am my own harshest critic. Given the

opportunity, I will most always jump forward to make a negative

judgment about myself, my appearance, and my actions. In reality, other

people are usually much more willing to allow me to make errors than am I.

Moreover, most people really couldn't care less what I am doing. They are

so caught up in their own stuff (just like I am caught up in mine) that it

would be unusual for them to take their eyes off of themselves in order to

see my own errors.

 

I should also strive to remember that what other people think of me is

none of my business. To repeat: What other people think of me is none of

my business. Whew! What a relief! For so many years I lived my life in

order to impress you, make you happy, or avoid embarrassment. The fact

that I don't have to worry about what you think of me takes a tremendous

load off of my shoulders.

 

Finally, I should keep in mind that mistakes are the price one pays for

growth. If I am out there in the world trying new things I am bound to be

making mistakes and errors. Hopefully, I can use the information gained

by my mistakes in order to continue learning and growing.

 

So live your life! Learn to play your violin as you go! But remember, the

real audience is much smaller and more forgiving than the audience we

imagine. And what they think of us is not our concern. So play, my

friends, play. There's nothing else to do, and the song is always beautiful.

 

Thought for the day: The only way I can be perfect is to perfectly accept

myself exactly as I am; faults, mistakes, warts and all.