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The straight track through a meandering path

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Dear So & So :-)

 

(The person this post was originally send to, agreed that I should post this

So & So)

 

You wrote:

> I feel like a child that is just beginning to learn to walk.

> Finding my voice has caused me more trouble,

> then when I was silent..

 

Actually, I do not think it caused YOU (the real self) trouble, but it

causes others some trouble with truth.

As your self confidence increases, tenuousness decreases. That tenuousness

probably shows through a little bit and people looking for weakness latch

onto that... but... it is not weakness... it is an innocent and positive

naivety... keep it... Signs of the inner perfect child, so invulnerable (and

yet so).

 

People who react negatively are, amongst other things, also sub-consciously

afraid that you will "hurt yourself"... meaning that you will be punished

for speaking so truthfully... That is their experience (although they may

have forgotten).

That is their problem, it was yours but not any more. It is the one in 500

that counts... ignore the others...

 

There is compassion, and dispassion... they somehow go together. (Is

'dispassion' an English word?)

> I feel like there are a multitude of obstacles in my path

> attempting to knock me down, preventing me from walking.

> I feel like the child that is afraid to speak to its elders,

> and finding the elders have no clue what I'm talking about...

> does that make sense? Am I talking baby talk?

> or am I talking in words that go way over their heads?

> Is it perhaps that like my children, that understand more

> than I give them credit for...That some adults are treating

> me the same way...That my words may come out as childish,

> and simple, easy explanations for complex theories.

 

It is good that you are voicing this... You are doing very well...

You are accepting help to guide you around those obstacles

that others are putting in your way...

I used to think that these type of things were tests. They are 'kind of',

but not deliberately, life just is that way.

> I ask myself, am I better off, just smiling and nodding my head,

> and saying "okay" and get back to reality......

 

You are in reality NOW... You may notice that you will be doing some

*genuine*

'smiling'... from understanding and compassion, not from giving in to the

lie.

> .... and forget about sharing what I know and understand?

> Keep it inside as my truth, and leave it there. Everywhere you

> look are still judgements, and people that claim enlightenment

> and don't look in the mirror. Is it harsh of me to be harsh,

> and ineffective of me when I am harsh??

> But love is not always rosy... If I love all and accept all, shouldn't

> that just allow me to shut my mouth and allow all.....

> Or should I shout out what I know if it can benefit someone,

> anyone, even if it is just one.

 

Everything you say here comes into play, it is part of the doubt that was

always there but is now being confronted by you... and as you do that, it is

on its way out...

 

Have you ever seen pictures of Buddhist lamas, (e.g. the Dalai Lama) their

faces... A strong understanding happiness, a loving kindness that overcomes

a possible harshness... a humour that has no trace of cynicism, etc.

Look for some pictures of them and notice that you recognize that in their

faces. Your face will be like that, it will happen to you... patience will

increase as you see how hard it is to put simplicity into practice,

reality... REALIZATION...

You will approach other people's difficulties that way, because you know how

it works... slowly... You are experiencing the dynamics of the re-emergence

of truth.

> The post ... about the meandering path on the k list...

 

Your are right, the path is meandering... but you are walking over it in as

straight a line as possible... straightening your track...

The meanders are behind you... In front of you see that the meandering path

is also a *wide* path and you are trying to walk forward over it in as

straight a line as you can. That is *not always in the middle*, sometimes

you

veer off to the left, sometimes you veer off to the right. When you look

from

the path's point of view you are going hither and thither but when you look

from your own point of view you are going as straight as you can, the truth

firmly under your feet and in your sight...

Can you visualize that.

> Don't misunderstand.. I don't feel that they HAVE to understand,

> I don't deny anyone their right to speak what they wish,

> and if I disagree, I try and make sure they know I lovingly disagree....

> but when someone gets pissy with me, I do get more clipped and

> short, afraid to say too much, afraid to be nice and yes,

> quite instantly afraid of them...

 

"How were your father or mother with you?" Understand your reaction as being

conditioned in early childhood situations. Remnants of behaviour, humorous

really, behaviour only... it is not you... Quite likely, one or both of your

parents had no patience with the ones around them, and your mom's or dad's

*behaviour* is still a bit stuck to you. It will go! How do I know?

It happened with me the same way...

> shall they crush me with their cruel human need to be on top

> shall I allow it by silence

> shall I respond to their human need with a mirror

> shall I hate myself for pointing them to the mirror

> shall I remain silent , and in doing so......do they

> see.......... fear in me

> love in me

> hate in me

> weakness in me

>

> Which is the course of action?

<snip>

 

Yes, as you are suggesting to yourself, silence would be good... quite

likely just temporarily though.

Remember that straight track that you are making through that wide

meandering path...

You are now on the side of silence... but keeping your track straight you

will at some point speak again...

 

Because you do that well...

 

Silence, that is your own inner voice suggesting it. That voice knows that

Truth is not necessarily a verbal thing... it is also silence.

Silence is not withdrawal...

You have a lot to digest...

You do this for you... your true self.

 

Do not worry about what others say.

> And what they see, does it cause them to rejoice in their

> ego majesty or retreat in their own misery and say

> "why did I do that?"

 

You know, most people are so engrossed in their own game, they only see you

as the play ball in their game... they haven't seen you...

You have given notice that you are not going to be used as a pawn in their

strategies.

> ps. as I was rereading this, I felt, perhaps I should post this to the

> list... I don't know. I'll think about it

 

You know I was just thinking that...

 

Love, Wim

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Wim:

>Silence, that is your own inner voice suggesting it. That voice knows that

>Truth is not necessarily a verbal thing... it is also silence.

>Silence is not withdrawal...

 

Beautiful!!!

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