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Questioning the mirror metaphor

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Someone asked me:

> Tell me if I'm on to something here

> (if I can get the words out)

> When people "judge" something you say or do...

> then what they are really doing is seeing a reflection

> of themselves, and judging themselves???

> For example... if people accuse you all the time of your

> voice not being your own voice... is this because they are

> afraid of their own voice, and doubt it, so they doubt

> mine?

> Or the other day, (of course I saw the mirror then) when

> someone accused me of being "XXXXX"...

> Was she was only seeing herself...?

> Or if I say that you are wise (it is still a judgement... good

> or bad... It doesn't really matter..... It is still a judgement !)

> but you are wise, because I see what you are saying,

> and that is a reflection of myself....

> If I say someone is confusing... it's not that he or she is

> confusing... but a reflection of myself that I am confused,

> or in the mind translation confusing myself... ?

> I can go on and on...

> If my see my kid is whining, and I say "stop whining"

> hey.. guess what I'm whining..

> So when someone says "the dog is barking"

> Yep.... If you make the judgement that

> the dog is barking... that is you barking....

> Okay, still a little on the bizarre side... But I see...

> When someone makes a judgement "good or bad"

> it is still a judgement... and it is only a reflection...

> When you see "nothing" in yourself.. then you will see

> "nothing" in everyone else..

> If you see "love and beauty and compassion" in

> everyone else, that is you reflecting yourself..

> Oh god, that is so beautiful......

 

Well it is a bit more complex than the simple metaphor of the mirror and

self reflection onto others.

 

The mirror metaphor can work miracles with positive images and positive

observations. (I do not use the word judgement here). It does not work so

well, IN THE LONG RUN, with negative issues.

 

(It is actually very hard to tell an observation from a judgement. No matter

what, I deal with such verbal expressions, whether they be judgements or

observations, differently.)

 

Anyway, as you noticed the mirror metaphor can get a bit bizarre. It will,

in the long run, not lead to resolution, only self judgement, self

incrimination and self recrimination

 

You noticed that when you applied the positive images in the above examples,

that confusion and complexity do not seem to arise, while otherwise it only

seems to work partly right.

 

A long as one is aware of the limits of this metaphor, apply it. But as a

temporary tool.

 

Some people love shadow boxing, others love mirror fighting, reflecting

negativity back and forth... eventually splitting apart not even breaking

each other's or their own mirrors, eventually only seeing themselves in

their mirror, being totally self absorbed until someone else breaks their

mirror or is able to convince someone to do it themselves.

 

Some guru types, in spite of what we may feel about them when it happens,

are very good at breaking mirrors... it may only be years later that one

discovers that...

 

Love, Wim

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