Terry in Wonder-land

[Guest guest]

Hi Terry,

 

You evidently had a lovely day in the fresh air of spring where you could

wander and wonder freely. But you didn't seem to notice anyone else with

you other than those you have mentally put into convenient little boxes.

Seems like you are directly experiencing "despair", but would prefer to have

some other direct experience.(Isn't that always the way, one never is having

the direct experience one wants to have, foiled again.) It is difficult to

put THAT into a tidy box all figured out. Despair is very inconvenient but

very direct. Think of this state as saving grace.

 

So - if you are trying to get "out" the only way is to go in - life is very

Alice in Wonderland - since wonder is the theme for some, al least,

wondering about others.. Despair is a hole, dig down and make the hole

bigger and blacker and deeper. Let go of the idea that despair isn't nice

or holy or that you might need to take a pill or buy another book. Since

your last hope is gone (?) then your last fear went along with it. Tell me

about your despair in detail, what it feels like, not what you think about

it- You give me "your" despair and I'll give you "mine". We'll trade for

awhile.

 

Metta,

 

Joyce

 

 

 

 

 

 

> I went down to the post office to buy a money order for $89.95,

> excited that TeeGee was going to send me the "bargain of a lifetime,

> enlightenment in one easy lesson" and two burning bushes for prompt

> reply to the offer!!!! I stopped in at the Better Business Bureau and

> the nice lady there said they had no record of the TeeGee Corporation,

> but said, "We always recommend that people should not send dualistic

> dollars to non-dual corporations. Who knows if they are real? This

> is just leads to more seeking..." I noticed her nametag just said,

> "Judi". She laughed, "Heh, heh....". I didn't know what to do after

> that, and a nice man offered me a ride (there is a transit strike in

> Vancouver just now), but he didn't take me home. I ended up at the

> aquarium in front of the Lobster tank. I stared for what seemed like

> hours, but I couldn't understand a thing. Just a tank teeming with

> life. No answers here, I thought, and started off home, but fell into

> a hole in the sidewalk. "Get out of here before it's too late",

> yelled Tim. There seemed like a thousand voices: "It's spring in

> Victoria", said Wim, "Dependent Co-arising", said Greg, "Nothing

> happening here, everything happening here," said Dan, "Rigpa", said

> Joyce, "...said Ramana", said Vicki, and a nice man named Jan was

> uploading pictures of his cats to his computer, and I was more

> confused than ever. If only I had sent that money order...oh my god,

> it was my only hope. Deep despair. Who am I? How can I directly

> experience something, anything? Can I get out of this hole? Please

> send me the ending to this exciting adventure. Need help, Terry.

>

>

> /join

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> All paths go somewhere. No path goes nowhere. Paths, places, sights,

> perceptions, and indeed all experiences arise from and exist in and subside

> back into the Space of Awareness. Like waves rising are not different than

> the ocean, all things arising from Awareness are of the nature of

> Awareness. Awareness does not come and go but is always Present. It is

> Home. Home is where the Heart Is. Jnanis know the Heart to be the Finality

> of Eternal Being. A true devotee relishes in the Truth of Self-Knowledge,

> spontaneously arising from within into It Self. Welcome all to

a.

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> Your use of is subject to

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