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The Human/Divine SELF Restoration Process

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Dear Dharma,

 

You wrote:

> I gotta tell you, friend, that's about the craziest way

> I ever heard of to try to raise Kundalini!!

> You're a helluva lucky guy that your K. kicked in

> before you killed yourself. :)

 

It also means that you hardly read what I wrote on the K. list years

ago...

Not that that was needed!

It also means that you hardly read what I wrote in the post that you

just responded to.

 

Like I said there was absolutely no risk... and I did not "try to raise

Kundalini".

The self healing kicked in on time... as I knew it would.

I wanted to fully understand the dynamics of human suffering as well as

the dynamics of human healing.

> Itzhak Bentov, author of _Stalking the Wild Pendulum_, said in his

seminal

> article on his lab research into Kundalini, that he considered it a

normal

> development of the nervous system.

 

Kundalini will not happen to harmoniously developing humans...

Another blanket statement?

 

I have Itzhak's book, bought it hot off the press in those days. I love

his book, I recommned it to many but not for the K part, I did not find

everything on K. as he described in his conclusions.

Not that that is needed!

 

Love, Wim

And thanks for your concern...

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Dear Dharma,

 

You wrote:

> I really can't remember... sorry. :)

 

It's OK.

 

Me:

> >The self destruction took me a long time (it took me 13 years)

 

You:

> You did that for 13 years Wim!!

 

How I went about it was quite simple, but the picture I paint here is

even more simplified and the unsavoury details are... as they are

unsavoury... being left alone.

I started out by saying the f...our letter word. And especially the one

starting with a d... got pretty good mileage. None of those words were

in my original Dutch-English-Christian vocabulary. I took off my white

cloths (oh yes, just wait) and got myself being manipulated. Before, you

see, with a factory job on the side, I was a regular guru (Muktananda

type), the thing I did was called CEnTrance (Imagine that word written

in a circle, going from 'centre' to 'entrance' then via, 'trance'

wrapping itself around to 'trancent'). And there was the shaktipat

thing, and a small growing group of devotees.

The turn around towards my endeavour to find that innate human self

healing mechanism (software side:) and the need to fully understand

human suffering (software and hardware:) had to do with my, then, five

year old son (more later) who was involved in a vision that brought

about the resolution to devote my life to finding the destructive /

reconstructive breakpoint authentically. The vision had to do with a

certain 'Avalokiteshvara' whom I had never met before and whose name was

new to me.)

The following Saturday morning, I sent the devotees home, telling them

to figure it out for themselves as I had things to do.

I took books and paraphernalia, boxed them up and over time started to

forget all, even the Sanskrit I had laboured so willingly to learn.

I let myself being lived more and more by circumstance and when there

were forks in the road I took the one most travelled, living life by

letting morals and society's artificial checks and balances subside.

Yes, it is true, there was always the 'observer' in me, for lack of an

other word, and there was an angel on my shoulder... to stop me short of

molestation and worse.

 

This was not easy..., way harder than trying to stop to smoking, in fact

I found it very hard to start to smoking again.

In the beginning I was so extremely aware, but as I got into my

deviations, that awareness disappeared quickly as I lost myself in them.

I became a son of a bitch, which was not hard as I had been that (and

arrogant!) before. I had to learn to manipulate people though, which

trick is not too hard as I only had to look around for hints.

Twice I got myself into a big financial mess but I manipulated myself

out of it. Eventually I become manager of a computer training company

where everyone eventually (and myself initially) worked their pants off

and I in the end could just come in and do nothing (absolutely nothing),

which was the beginning of the end. I procured a hell of a good salary,

could travel a lot and did my things devious travelling. I will leave it

here... I ended up not a pretty sight not even able to enjoy the very

rich bonus-and-thank-you holiday from the shareholders in the most

expensive place in country.

 

Me:

> >we are resilient, my God; the auto-therapy was

> >way shorter (about 2.5 years). I was surprised

> >about the short restoration time, however intense

> >it was and however hard work it took.

 

You:

> I'd be interested to hear about those 2.5 years, exactly how it went.

:)

 

I would like to oblige, I have written about that a lot in snippets and

long emails over the past three years. I am in the process of collating

that material from about 1600 pages of email,

 

Me:

> >Like I said there was absolutely no risk...

> >and I did not "try to raise Kundalini".

 

You:

> You were trying to *force* "the healing mechanism" to "kick in."

> Isn't that the same thing?

 

If you replace the words "trying to force" with "expecting in due time",

that is what I am trying to say, BUT at that time, I did NOT AT ALL make

the connection that is was unadulterated full force kundalini. I only id

entified it with my wife after she, by chance, got me Yvonne Kason's

book.

 

Me:

> >The self healing kicked in on time... as I knew it would.

> >I wanted to fully understand the dynamics of human

> > suffering as well as the dynamics of human healing.

 

You:

> But I have to say... if you were doing that in full confidence that

K.

> would appear and save the day, isn't that pretty different from

someone

> who's just plain self-destructive? So I'm not sure it proves anything.

 

The idea was not at all to prove, nor did I know that it would be K...

No proof was needed as I was already confident and convinced that the

'solution comes with the problem'. That was an insight that came

originally from my mother and that became part of the enlightenment

phase that culminated for me in 1975.

 

The kundalini aspect only dawned on me a little while into the self

healing phase... and only after corroboration of characteristics that I

found in Yvonne's book and later in 'Hata Yoga Pradipika'.

 

Remember, I set out (1) to fully experience the dynamics of human

suffering, that was the intent of the self-destructive phase and (2) I

wanted to find out what that self healing mechanism entailed, that was

the reconstructive phase.

 

I did not need to prove that it would happen... I already knew. I wanted

to find out what the processes were, the dynamics.

 

You:

> >>Itzhak Bentov, author of _Stalking the Wild Pendulum_, said

> >>in his seminal article on his lab research into Kundalini,

> >>that he considered it a normal development of the nervous system.

 

Me:

> >Kundalini will not happen to harmoniously developing humans...

> >Another blanket statement?

 

You:

> Well, if you mean people who have no blocks and so forth,

> I don't think there are any...

> except for people who've worked hard to clear them...

> and even then, you have to keep clearing.

> You pick up more stuff just in the course of everyday life.

 

No, not so...not to prove anything but... here is another experiment

that we did, (and again I have written about that before...)

Emmy, my wife, and I did not know that we were expecting a son. Emmy

thought that she could not get pregnant, 4.5 months into the (what

appeared to be) pregnancy we discovered that she was pregnant... (Were

we daft or what? :-) Previous dreams and visions started to fall in

place and make sense. Our son's was a home birth, in a cabin in the

woods in which we lived... Very very beautiful... Imagine perfection, be

daring! It was so!

Angels came down in choirs to sing and we called our son Emanuel

Krishna...

>From the moment he was born we took the furniture out of our cabin,

lived on the floor on carpets, pillows and cushions so that we could be

equal to him, not towering menaces. We introduced furniture as he grew

up (in Dutch we say "navenant") and he was always part of the choosing.

During his birth, Emmy and myself easily confirmed to each other that we

would not use words like 'No' or 'Don't', etc. We resolved that we could

only be positive as we already had discovered that such stands on its

own as divine reality, negativity having no existential characteristics

in reality except in illusion and conceptual notions. We could easily be

totally unconditional... There was never a: "If you do this or that,

then you will be punished or corrected or rewarded." That was part of

our enlightenment and it was so easy... Emanuel is a most wonderful

being, who when he was 17, realized that he was enlightened from the get

go... and that that was nothing special per se. It was a birthright that

was never taken away.

We were on a trip through Holland, when, while sitting by a lock in a

small waterway of a tiny country village... he said that it was all so

simple, that he had no questions or doubts whatsoever. For two hours his

grace and gratitude beamed off him, the most wonderful gift a child can

ever have his parents participate in...

Emanuel fully functions, is a happy dancing singing music making

computer programmer, director of a medium size computer company. He

travels the world with his backpack and laptop from chinatown Victoria,

where he lives. Travelling from Iceland to Kuala Lumpur to India to

Europe and whatever in between... He smiles...

We never had to provide for him except for setting the environment the

way a gardener would do for a flower to develop from seed.... knowing

that the seed grows by itself.

Nothing about reincarnations... He just is...

There were and never are any expectations in his life...

When I asked him about my destructive / reconstructive experiment he

said "Do it', he was five years old...

 

This is not to brag, I hope that that is clear. I grew up a

'radically'... from the root on up...

My parents were not perfect (No way was he perfect, my dad told me when

he set my early nightmares in my youth to rest as he was preparing to

pass on)...

My mother's earliest sayings that I remember were: "Don't worry it will

land on its feet.", "It finds the solution by itself.", " It will find

its own direction by itself. "

(She is 86 and will come to visit us from Holland this coming Sunday...

first time in an airplane...

Neat eh?!)

 

You:

> And how about all the spontaneous awakenings nowadays?

> Seems to be a regular epidemic!

 

Hold the word "epidemic" Dharma, I know you don't mean it that way, but

better to use a better word if we have one...??? :-)

The spontaneous awakenings are the self healing process... exactly my

point... I am not surprised. You think all these bodhisattvas are just

sitting there catching flies... :-)))

Swat! "Dang it, another self-awakening..." Swat, swat!

 

You:

> But nobody's sure of the cause...

 

Hey, Dharma, what about just the innate process to heal oneself...

> Love,

> Dharma

 

Absolutely,

Love, Wim

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Dear Maureen

 

Dharma wrote:

> Okay, but there were no known cases of it (K.) in the West before

1932,

> except maybe for someone who went to the East to study yoga...

> now it's all over the place. Clearly something has changed. :)

 

Wim wrote to Dharma:

> So true, in 1929 there was a convention of

> 12 bodhisattvas in the heavenly realm :-)

> where it was decided *to promote* the idea that the

> retransmission of suffering to the next generation had to stop...

 

Maureen wrote:

> I'm confused!! No cases of K awakening in the West before a certain

> date? Or are you saying just recorded? Because I see it in many cases

> and lives. George Washington stands out among others.Don't you see the

> American Indians as very K active? I do.

 

*Promote* is the keyword in my answer above.

 

Of course the self reintegration to regain the human/divine unity and

reality was available from day one (?) :-) "Thanks be to God!!!"

 

There is a link between 'generational transmission of suffering' and

'Kundalini / SELF reintegration'.

When SELF reintegration kicks in a tad late :-) in life, the inherited

or

passed on suffering from ancestors gets carried over to the next

descendants. That is the meaning of the Judeo(?) / Christian concept of

'eternal sin' or as we say it in Dutch 'inherited sin' (erfzonde)

 

Sin comes from 'being without', 'being amiss', 'wanting'.

Being on 'the left side of zero on the number line.

Conceptual negative numbers only have hypothetical reality.

Being in the red is really ILLUSORY DEBT to institutions (instituted

debt).

Institutions with illusory, although agreed upon power.

 

Sine (latin), zonder (Dutch), sans (French).

 

'Inherited Sin' (ahum) has only illusory power through the institution

of threat enforced power, duress only, never agreement.

The institution became formalized in deficiency centered cultures...

mostly (but not exclusively) in the form of religions.

 

None of us is conceived or even born deficient !

This has to be our common re-cognized truth !

 

As I have written before, Adam and Eve during the Eden episode

recovered the innate human / divine re-integration mechanism

first hand (if I may say so).

 

It was momentous, although the *attempt* to crush it came almost

immediately...

A temporary recoil...

Selvation (sic) cannot be crushed...

SELF will raise its head...

Uncoil we will

 

Love, Wim

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Hi Wim,

 

Maureen's response to me was not posted on this list. But since you have

sent it, I'll just say that my statement was on the basis of Sanella's

book... and I'll send the excerpts that I sent to Maureen's list.

 

Love,

Dharma

>Dharma wrote:

>>> Okay, but there were no known cases of it (K.) in the West before

>1932,

>>> except maybe for someone who went to the East to study yoga...

>>> now it's all over the place. Clearly something has changed. :)

>>

>Maureen wrote:

>> I'm confused!! No cases of K awakening in the West before a certain

>> date? Or are you saying just recorded? Because I see it in many cases

>> and lives. George Washington stands out among others.Don't you see the

>> American Indians as very K active? I do.

>snip<

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