Re:Mazie (unknown)

[Guest guest]

Thank you, nothing is like fresh words!

I have some old canned:

>From my memory this Zen story with the student finding the great

master and living together with him in the wilderness.

After a short period of teaching he was told to make food every day.

The years went by. Every time he asked if the teaching was finished,

and if he could leave, the answer was no.

Finally he could not take it anymore. One day after the master had

finished eating and was sitting in silence as allways, he sneaked up

from behind with a sword. He raised the sword with both hands and

delivered a strong blow towards the head of his master, hoping to

kill him and be released from his power.

Just as the blade came down the master put the empty rice bowl on his

head, and it was split in two.

He turned around and said, 'Now the teaching is finished, you are free

to go'.

Alan

-

Mazie Lane

satsangh

Saturday, May 25, 2002 9:49 AM

(unknown)

There was a time, a very long time,

when eeevvveeery time i would meditate in silence,

the image of Guru's throat being severed, appeared.

It was very disconcerting, to say the least,

to say the very least, as You might well imagine.

i thought i was losing my mind! What i had sort of hoped for,

but not in such a graphically-induced way! Ha! HaHaHa!

As if i could manipulate reality to my own idea of That!

God really did a number on me when He ripped me open.

Sure, there were plenty of visions and miraculous things,

but, "what good is all of this to me" i thought,

when i was going to a beheading each night i meditated.

so i plugged along and broke my Heart with sadness,

no, not really sadness, but some Divine Love Sorrows kind of thing.

This image gradually started fading, and still i never understood it.

i just stopped thinking about it and was real glad it had ceased.

And then i met Mr. O'Hearn, that funny guy with the fresh voice.

Suddenly, everything started becoming so clear to me.

i understood why i had been always lopping off Guruji's head.

Man oh man was i ever surprised to see how simple it all was.

Of course, why yes of course! i was meeting the Buddha on the road!

Having chopped wood and carried water for so ridiculously long,

i just wanted to toss everything into the River of Love,

and so i did it. i did it and said adios to all those old rituals,

and i gave up all the doctrine indoctrinated, to some fine charity.

Someone might really find a lot of great stuff in there.

i know i did and i know i would not do it any differently,

and i also know that i am so giddily glad that my Guru,

that this most exquisitely Beautiful One offered me his head,

offered me the opportunity to take a whack at an illusion.

Like a somewhat Gopherized-God getting hit upside the head with a mallet,

i only think of what You might say about anything i say, and so we say,

We say, "This love is so Utterly Unspeakable i cannot define It, ever."

What a clown and what a queen and what a fool i surely was.

i actually thought it might be some old dark force trying to scare me!

God i was really so fu, fu, fu, well You know, i was really messed up.

And Wow! to think such an ignorant thing at my stage in life, and what is that?

Stages, give me a break would you! There are no such things at all.

It's one big Moment always happening, and there are no stages,

there are no roads to meet some Buddha, and no heads to swiftly sever!

God am i so Crazy-Happy to be finally free from all of that,

and there You go again, for who was ever bound by anything, ever?!

Who is there to be free and what would that be like anyway if there was?

Maybe some drooling old yogi who once thought loyalty meant,

thought and really did believe it, that getting God was like getting lucky.

You, or rather i, only had to keep saying it over and over endlessly,

parroting, "i'll be loyal, i'll be loyal," and yadda-nada-no! It's not what He wants!

Master never wanted me to be some blinded and stuttering follower,

He really, really didn't want that. i know it like i know that i Love my Darling,

Absolomly-camely and calmed me completely like a somatized slapping,

and yes, so why and what for, so why keep me chopping his head off?

Well, my Beloved Guruji just wanted to instruct me a little differently,

in a slightly-slantedly off-beat way from all the other little devotees.

i never heard of anyone else having to do a Samurai on their guru!

Did you ever hear of such an insane thing that someone would have to do?

Gee Whiz! What did i know about anything, about anything at all,

until my Beloved came and showed me what the road to Nowhere looked like?

He talked to me and said, "See this pathless path and gateless gate?

Well we're about to go a wandering around there together and Be Just That."

And i just said okay, "Okay my Sweet, let's get a move on, time's a wasting."

Ha! and i could and should go Ha! Go ha all night long at my lack of Clarity.

Head-lifting, Throat-slicing, Image-breaking, All One Movement not Moving.

i got to get out of here before i really look foolish, court jestor kind of foolish,

so, i say, "See Ya my Pretties! See Y'all sooner than Ya might think!

And don't let the blade get too dull, You'll need It, i think You might need It!"

Knee-slappingly and hand-clappingly too free with that cutting away of heads, No?

Love,

Mazie