From Echart Tolle

June 15, 2002

Eckhart Tolle:

The story which I described briefly in the introduction to my book,

The Power of Now, is that for many years I lived in the state of

great fear and continuous fluctuation between states of depression

and high anxiety. This was to the point of becoming almost

unbearable. One night I woke up in the middle of the night, as I had

many times before, in a state of even more intense dread and fear.

The mind had lots of reasons why I was feeling fearful, and yet that

state was continuous no matter what my external situation was. It

became so unbearable that suddenly the thought occurred to me, "I

cannot live with myself any longer." That thought was the trigger for

a transformation. The thought kept repeating itself many times in my

head and then suddenly there was a stepping back from the thought and

a looking at the thought. I asked: "Who is this I and who is the self

that I cannot live with?"

In Zen they have koans, and it was as if a koan spontaneously

appeared in my mind. A koan's purpose is to destroy conceptual

thinking because it has no answer on a conceptual level. So, I

asked: "Who is this self that I cannot live with?Are there one or

two? If I cannot live with myself, who is that self?" Then, beyond

thought, there was the recognition of the "unhappy me", as I later

called it, as being something completely non-substantial and

fictional. Then consciousness withdrew completely from identification

with that "unhappy me". At that moment, the whole structure of

the "unhappy me" and its pain collapsed because the withdrawal of

identification was so complete. What was left was simply beingness or

Presence. There was still a moment of fear. It felt like being drawn

into a hole within myself, a vast whirlpool, and a realization arose

in my chest: "Resist nothing." That was the key. Then resistance was

relinquished, and I don't know what happened after that.

June 15, 2002

Dear One

its not clear as to whether the post was from Eckhart

personally or lifted from his book please clarify.

My partner Anne and I went to see Eckhart at St Jameses in London this

year and Anne ended up on stage with him to say a prayer and light a

candle.

Every time I read the opening of his book I am almost moved to tears.

I have in the distant past been in such a state of misery due to my

excessive drinking. I recovered from that but unfortunately did not

have the experience of awakening that Eckhart was blessed with.

However I am gratefull for my sobriety and endevour to stay present

as advocated by Eckhar. His book and tapes really opened my heart and

brought me to the realisation of how ego conditioned I was. Still

observing this as the pain body.

I guess I was ready for his signposts (teaching) having read Ramana

and I am THAT & many other good books. Not impling that one master is

any better than an other. Ultimately the Guru within rules.

Regards Chris

i could not snip the message sorry

Eckhart Tolle:The story which I described briefly in the introduction

to my book, The Power of Now, is that for many years I lived in the

state of great fear and continuous fluctuation between states of

depression and high anxiety. This was to the point of becoming almost