Guest guest Posted October 20, 2002 Report Share Posted October 20, 2002 **SIGH** That is a big sigh of great relief. Ever since the baby was born there have been moments and episodes of great stress for me...when both children are needing their mother at once. Almost always, because of necessity, I must tend to the littlest first and this has brought great pain to our daughter (who will be five soon), and, of course, her pain is also mine. I had allowed myself to get exhausted in the attempt to keep Ananda from feeling the pain of this form of separation by trying to keep things the way they were before the baby came, like by playing with her, reading with her, taking her for walks and to the playground, etc. It wasn't working. Exhaustion never works! Then, recently, something clicked, like a fingersnap. All I need to do is to BE THERE when she looks to me. I do not even need to get up from my chair or speak a single word, let alone tire myself in the various attempts to give her something I think will make her happy. All I need to do is be fully present, fully aware, and fully in love when she is hurting and she looks into my eyes. This is a tremendous gift for us both, you know. Some people call it satsang. And it Gives life and it Gives energy, and it magnifies the peace and the love and the joy that we know is always available. Ever since this fingersnap, Ananda and I have been feeling free and unburdened again. I have had more energy to do things with her for the sheer joy of doing them and for no other reason, and she responds to this with squeals of delight and sparkling laughter at the littlest provocation. Also, I have found that both of us are resting deeper. **SIGH** Now I have tears in my eyes, because I feel so grateful and truly wish this deep rest, this sweet restful peace, for every(single)one. With so much love, Kheyala Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 20, 2002 Report Share Posted October 20, 2002 , "Kheyala" <kheyala@n...> wrote: **SIGH** That is a big sigh of great relief. Ever since the baby was born there have been moments and episodes of great stress for me...when both children are needing their mother at once. Almost always, because of necessity, I must tend to the littlest first and this has brought great pain to our daughter (who will be five soon), and, of course, her pain is also mine. I had allowed myself to get exhausted in the attempt to keep Ananda from feeling the pain of this form of separation by trying to keep things the way they were before the baby came, like by playing with her, reading with her, taking her for walks and to the playground, etc. It wasn't working. Exhaustion never works! Then, recently, something clicked, like a fingersnap. All I need to do is to BE THERE when she looks to me. I do not even need to get up from my chair or speak a single word, let alone tire myself in the various attempts to give her something I think will make her happy. All I need to do is be fully present, fully aware, and fully in love when she is hurting and she looks into my eyes. This is a tremendous gift for us both, you know. Some people call it satsang. And it Gives life and it Gives energy, and it magnifies the peace and the love and the joy that we know is always available. Ever since this fingersnap, Ananda and I have been feeling free and unburdened again. I have had more energy to do things with her for the sheer joy of doing them and for no other reason, and she responds to this with squeals of delight and sparkling laughter at the littlest provocation. Also, I have found that both of us are resting deeper. **SIGH** Now I have tears in my eyes, because I feel so grateful and truly wish this deep rest, this sweet restful peace, for every(single)one. With so much love, Kheyala Dearest Kheyala, This is so Dear, Dearest. Here's something from b for you this morning - He was nearly 2 years old. Until this day, he frolicked in undifferentiated awareness, without any sense of separation. It is the natural state, although to even describe it as a state is inaccurate. Timeless, free of all choosing, bright and shining being - - all just words that of course cannot really convey the mystery rapture of the truth of all of us. He is sitting in a hallway, about 20 feet from his mother, who has recently returned from the hospital after birthing his new sister. He is radiating pure joy and delight! There is nothing but this persistent bliss, regardless of any sensations, which are also experienced as echoes of the mystery rapture itself. Suddenly, incredibly – there is a stark and undeniable observation: he is distinct from his mother! She is over in the kitchen and he is here, on the floor, in the hallway! A monumental fear grasps him! He opens his mouth to scream, but he is paralyzed. Shocked and mute, he knows he is embodied for the first time, and this hell of apparent individuation seizes him in an enormous vice of panic and terror! Thus begins my dream journey. Now I see that moment as a Kiss of most merciful Blessing. I am my mother, and I am the hallway, and I am the fear, and I am the joy, and I am here, and this is the only place there is. And it is wonderful, and it is terrible, and it is awesome, and it is ordinary, and it is – just is! And we float, untethered, forever at peace in limitless Mystery -- so utterly amazed, and so poignantly held in Arms of Loving Grace! LoveAlways, Mazie & b Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 20, 2002 Report Share Posted October 20, 2002 Dearest Mazie and b, I'm all choked up.... I hadn't planned on posting "Ahhhh" to HS until I thought, "Oh, but I really want Mazie to read it" and then when I checked messages, there were Grace and Evelyn and all I could do was gaze and gaze and there were no thoughts and there was only This Beauty. And THEN, as if the moment could be any More blessed, here is this sharing from b and his precious, ageless heart of two and also of two- times-who-cares-how-many and I feel like gratitude is just spilling over all over the place.... ....and it keeps on tumbling back and forth, mysteriously between and within itself... Oh my gosh, such grace... So silent and yet utterly obvious... Om Shanti Om > Dearest Kheyala, > > This is so Dear, Dearest. Here's something from b for you this > morning - > > He was nearly 2 years old. Until this day, he frolicked in > undifferentiated awareness, without any sense of separation. It is > the natural state, although to even describe it as a state is > inaccurate. Timeless, free of all choosing, bright and shining being - > - all just words that of course cannot really convey the mystery > rapture of the truth of all of us. > > He is sitting in a hallway, about 20 feet from his mother, who has > recently returned from the hospital after birthing his new sister. He > is radiating pure joy and delight! There is nothing but this > persistent bliss, regardless of any sensations, which are also > experienced as echoes of the mystery rapture itself. > > Suddenly, incredibly – there is a stark and undeniable observation: > he is distinct from his mother! > She is over in the kitchen and he is here, on the floor, in the > hallway! > > A monumental fear grasps him! He opens his mouth to scream, but he is > paralyzed. Shocked and mute, he knows he is embodied for the first > time, and this hell of apparent individuation seizes him in an > enormous vice of panic and terror! > > Thus begins my dream journey. > Now I see that moment as a Kiss of most merciful Blessing. > > I am my mother, and I am the hallway, and I am the fear, and I am the > joy, and I am here, and this is the only place there is. And it is > wonderful, and it is terrible, and it is awesome, and it is ordinary, > and it is – just is! And we float, untethered, forever at peace in > limitless Mystery -- so utterly amazed, and so poignantly held in > Arms of Loving Grace! > > > > LoveAlways, > > Mazie & b Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 20, 2002 Report Share Posted October 20, 2002 Hi Kheyala, On a similar level - when mother or father is on the telephone or watching TV to the child or infant the parent has disappeared into the phone or the TV (or anything requiring intense focus like the computer)! The child then starts acting out, demanding attention in various ways. The cure is just what you discovered. One turns completely, makes eye-contact, and that may be enough. The parent may have to speak saying something like, "I am here, what do you need?" And it never takes more than a minute to handle the situation. If on the phone, it is important to put the phone down to assist reappearance. Love, John L. , "Kheyala" <kheyala@n...> wrote: > **SIGH** > > That is a big sigh of great relief. > > Ever since the baby was born there have been moments and episodes of great stress for me...when both children are needing their mother at once. Almost always, because of necessity, I must tend to the littlest first and this has brought great pain to our daughter (who will be five soon), and, of course, her pain is also mine. > > I had allowed myself to get exhausted in the attempt to keep Ananda from feeling the pain of this form of separation by trying to keep things the way they were before the baby came, like by playing with her, reading with her, taking her for walks and to the playground, etc. It wasn't working. Exhaustion never works! > > Then, recently, something clicked, like a fingersnap. > > All I need to do is to BE THERE when she looks to me. I do not even need to get up from my chair or speak a single word, let alone tire myself in the various attempts to give her something I think will make her happy. All I need to do is be fully present, fully aware, and fully in love when she is hurting and she looks into my eyes. > > This is a tremendous gift for us both, you know. Some people call it satsang. And it Gives life and it Gives energy, and it magnifies the peace and the love and the joy that we know is always available. > > Ever since this fingersnap, Ananda and I have been feeling free and unburdened again. I have had more energy to do things with her for the sheer joy of doing them and for no other reason, and she responds to this with squeals of delight and sparkling laughter at the littlest provocation. Also, I have found that both of us are resting deeper. > > **SIGH** > > Now I have tears in my eyes, because I feel so grateful and truly wish this deep rest, this sweet restful peace, for every(single)one. > > With so much love, > Kheyala Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 21, 2002 Report Share Posted October 21, 2002 Hi John Thank you for the reminder....especially about the resolution being so quick. It's easy to forget that part when there is resistance to truly stopping, and we Know how long it takes resistance to solve anything!!! (as if it ever had a chance Love, Kheyala , "John Logan" <johnrloganis> wrote: > Hi Kheyala, > On a similar level - > when mother or father is on the telephone or watching TV to the child > or infant the parent has disappeared into the phone or the TV (or > anything requiring intense focus like the computer)! > > The child then starts acting out, demanding attention in various > ways. The cure is just what you discovered. One turns completely, > makes eye-contact, and that may be enough. The parent may have to > speak saying something like, "I am here, what do you need?" And it > never takes more than a minute to handle the situation. > > If on the phone, it is important to put the phone down to assist > reappearance. > > Love, > John L. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 22, 2002 Report Share Posted October 22, 2002 Yessssssss! Satsang,simple presence with my children is the best...this is where i fall so easily in love with life. Thank you Shawn on 10/20/02 7:12 AM, Kheyala at kheyala wrote: > **SIGH** > > That is a big sigh of great relief. > > Ever since the baby was born there have been moments and episodes of great > stress for me...when both children are needing their mother at once. Almost > always, because of necessity, I must tend to the littlest first and this has > brought great pain to our daughter (who will be five soon), and, of course, > her pain is also mine. > > I had allowed myself to get exhausted in the attempt to keep Ananda from > feeling the pain of this form of separation by trying to keep things the way > they were before the baby came, like by playing with her, reading with her, > taking her for walks and to the playground, etc. It wasn't working. > Exhaustion never works! > > Then, recently, something clicked, like a fingersnap. > > All I need to do is to BE THERE when she looks to me. I do not even need to > get up from my chair or speak a single word, let alone tire myself in the > various attempts to give her something I think will make her happy. All I > need to do is be fully present, fully aware, and fully in love when she is > hurting and she looks into my eyes. > > This is a tremendous gift for us both, you know. Some people call it satsang. > And it Gives life and it Gives energy, and it magnifies the peace and the love > and the joy that we know is always available. > > Ever since this fingersnap, Ananda and I have been feeling free and unburdened > again. I have had more energy to do things with her for the sheer joy of > doing them and for no other reason, and she responds to this with squeals of > delight and sparkling laughter at the littlest provocation. Also, I have > found that both of us are resting deeper. > > **SIGH** > > Now I have tears in my eyes, because I feel so grateful and truly wish this > deep rest, this sweet restful peace, for every(single)one. > > With so much love, > Kheyala > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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