Guest guest Posted January 5, 2003 Report Share Posted January 5, 2003 Hi Bob, Thank you for your kind and instructive thoughts. They are helpful. , Bigbobgraham@a... wrote: One question I have wanted to ask is How does one reduce one's level of indulgences? That is, eliminate an indulgence without replacing it with another? I could say introduce the opposite but the will power to do that is usually lacking. It is like fighting a tide. With respect to the above question I have found that using will-power to deal with the "indulgences", addictions, or other behaviours which one wishes to change is not handled by attempting to reverse it with its opposite, or to otherwise control it. What that does is reinforce the undesired behavior! In fact it tends to "fix" it and make it harder to deal with. There is an aphorism "Resistence creates persistence." Just so. What really seems to work is to fully, consciously experience the behavior or attitude, the indulgence. Just observe it as it occurs and notice the causes and effects present. No judgement, no bias, no decisions. What tends to happen is that the "behavior" is weakened each time the "observation" occurs. Eventually, more or less quickly, it disappears. Why? Because it has been fulfilled! The desire element in it makes itself known and once fulfilled is no longer useful or needed. Example. I am prone to anger responses when frustrated. If I acknowledge immediately that I am angry -- the anger disappears because the situation is grounded. In the acknowledgement I can now choose what I am expressing and how I will express it. Sometimes I want the anger to run its course, but most of the time, the anger does not get the result I wanted in the first place so observing that it stops expressing. The root is always the desire for "self" to be acknowledged. Observing that puts the situation in its proper perspective. The key to an "indulgence": Something wants to be acknowledged. Once acknowledged the "want" is fulfilled and the effects are no longer needed. Further I have personally been helped with an awareness in which I "Let all things come together." So, as Michael Valentine Smith said in Heinlein's book STRANGER IN A STRANGE LAND, "Waiting is till fullness". This is actually a very Taoist action, but it lets "self" takes its natural place in the flow of things, and that attachment to "self" simply becomes part of the action rather than the center. Peace, John L. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 5, 2003 Report Share Posted January 5, 2003 The root is always the desire for "self" to be > acknowledged. Observing that puts the situation in its proper > perspective. Good advice. I will carry this and the rest with me. Thanks. Bobby G. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 6, 2003 Report Share Posted January 6, 2003 resisting reinforces duality. in unity there is no resistance because there is no thing to resist. , "John Logan <johnrloganis>" <johnrloganis> wrote: > Hi Bob, > Thank you for your kind and instructive thoughts. They are helpful. > > , Bigbobgraham@a... wrote: > One question I have wanted to ask is How does one reduce one's level > of indulgences? That is, eliminate an indulgence without replacing > it with another? I could say introduce the opposite but the will > power to do that is usually lacking. It is like fighting a tide. > > With respect to the above question I have found that using will- power > to deal with the "indulgences", addictions, or other behaviours which > one wishes to change is not handled by attempting to reverse it with > its opposite, or to otherwise control it. What that does is reinforce > the undesired behavior! In fact it tends to "fix" it and make it > harder to deal with. There is an aphorism "Resistence creates > persistence." Just so. > > What really seems to work is to fully, consciously experience the > behavior or attitude, the indulgence. Just observe it as it occurs > and notice the causes and effects present. No judgement, no bias, no > decisions. What tends to happen is that the "behavior" is weakened > each time the "observation" occurs. Eventually, more or less quickly, > it disappears. Why? Because it has been fulfilled! The desire element > in it makes itself known and once fulfilled is no longer useful or > needed. > > Example. I am prone to anger responses when frustrated. If I > acknowledge immediately that I am angry -- the anger disappears > because the situation is grounded. In the acknowledgement I can now > choose what I am expressing and how I will express it. Sometimes I > want the anger to run its course, but most of the time, the anger > does not get the result I wanted in the first place so observing that > it stops expressing. The root is always the desire for "self" to be > acknowledged. Observing that puts the situation in its proper > perspective. > > The key to an "indulgence": Something wants to be acknowledged. Once > acknowledged the "want" is fulfilled and the effects are no longer > needed. > > Further I have personally been helped with an awareness in which > I "Let all things come together." So, as Michael Valentine Smith said > in Heinlein's book STRANGER IN A STRANGE LAND, "Waiting is till > fullness". This is actually a very Taoist action, but it lets "self" > takes its natural place in the flow of things, and that attachment > to "self" simply becomes part of the action rather than the center. > > Peace, > John L. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 6, 2003 Report Share Posted January 6, 2003 , "SENSARU <sensaru>" <sensaru> wrote: > resisting reinforces duality. in unity there is no resistance because > there is no thing to resist. Most excellent point and well said. John L. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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