A Poem About Forgiveness

[Guest guest]

The Antidote

 

There is a lot of noise about forgiveness

it is said; "God forgives You"

but God made me what I am.

I am not the doer.

 

Then shall i forgive God?

If i am not the doer

Then how shall i?

 

If God does not exist

then i am the doer;

Shall i forgive myself?

 

Long ago i learned

God is my very self;

so then, shall i forgive

the self of myself.

 

I am angry because god has done this.

or i have, is there any difference?

if i believe in God

then it is God's doing.

 

On the other hand

if i do not believe

then i am my own God;

One must forgive or suffer

there is no choice.

 

The same applies to hate;

i hate God - or myself

again, is there any difference?

I became love many years ago

i knew this Love.

 

God appeared out of that

and I became, hating god's intervention;

hating myself, hating my existence.

i rejected God.

 

I put a form in front of god

and worshipped that

hating its existence.

 

My experience of the world

became a reflection of my hate;

i would not forgive myself.

 

Hating, of course i denied God himself;

i would not love that self

which resides in that love.

 

In the dark, i existed

surrounded on all sides by rejection

a mantle of jealousy surrounding my heart.

 

That Love\light stymied

covered in darkness, i ran away.

ahead of me, unfolded my fear;

i lived in a world of secret remorse.

 

A dark thing hating the light

Love deserted me, or i deserted Love;

I could not forgive myself.

 

The slimy black snake of anger

slithered out of my mind

and threw me to the floor

scheming death.

 

Love screamed out for God

in the voice stolen from hate;

the snake wailed and twitched in death

as Love came home.

 

Forgiveness, what is that but Love

which is my very self, whom i forgive.

this act is Love, which is myself

given to me.