The Journey of My Heart 4

[Guest guest]

Passages from the Diary of a Pilgrim to Sri Ramanasramam

 

 

December 30, 1982:

This Afternoon at 4 p.m., Ramaswami Pillai, Paul [Evelyn's husband]

and I went on rickshaw pradakshina during the lunar eclipse. I

attempted to walk besidethe rickshaw could talk (Ramaswami and Paul

rode in the rickshaw), but since the driver had trouble pedaling so

slowly I ultimately had to climb in and sit on the small front bench.

 

Paul and I recited the "Sri Lalitasahasranam Stotram" as we went and

Ramaswami's mood was melted. Here and there he would single out a

name and repeat it in ecstasy.

We stopped the rickshaw to walk around the shrines of Ganesha and

Hanuman and had passed Adi Annamalai by the time the recitation

ended. The sun was setting and the sky was covered in hues of gentle

pink, lavender and an unearthly blue. The normal reality of objects

and events seemed called into question inthe magical light of dusk.

Ramaswami said, "You have the recitation of ‘Sri Lalitasahasranam

Stotram' by heart, it seems. Very few can do it—it's a very rare

thing. And you do it with faith.... ‘Sri Lalitasahasranam' is so

concentrated, so powerful! You can go on and on reciting it like

Bhagavan's hymns."

At Bhagavan's bridge we offered chocolates, peanuts and tea to

Swamiji. He declined our peanuts saying, "You will first have to give

me teeth!" However, he then made it clear he had declined the Ashram's

offers to make him dentures. He told us that at the preceding culvert

Bhagavan had composed the verse of "Arunachala Akshara Mana Malai,

"Unless Thou savest me I shall melt away in tears of anguish, Oh

Arunachala!" Bhagavan told him that at that time a great flood of

tears actually poured forth from his eyes!

"We'd be so carefree with Bhagavan!" Ramaswami continued. "We'd be singing and dancing!"

"Really?" I asked.

"Oh yes! We had a hell of it!" he exclaimed laughing.

On the paved road approaching Kubera Lingam we saw the moon in eclipse

rising. The sun had just set and Ramaswami commented that in a certain

town in South India one may see the beautiful sight of "The Twin

Suns," i.e., the sun and moon rising and setting simultaneously on

opposite horizons.

Ramaswami told Paul, "Whatever good work you take up there will be

people to criticize you, but with love there comes understanding. You

cannot really know a person unless you love the person." He spoke so

beautifully while riding around Arunachala I wished I could have

captured every word verbatim.

January 3. 1983

Once more I joined Ramaswami Pillai during the rest period after lunch

and he talked on various subjects. Again and again he stressed the

importance of practicing Sri Bhagavan's teaching of Self-enquiry and

Self-surrender: "The two are one, you see. Only when you know ‘who am

I?' can surrender really come.

"Sri Bhagavan's teaching is really practical, but some people make it

into a philosophy. They really wish to publicize themselves. People

may talk on and on about Bhagavan, they may praise him, but unless

they practice his teachings none of this impresses me.

"I can't talk this way with everyone," Ramaswami commented. "I am

talking with you as though to a goddess. Because, you see, in India

we stress that a man must be very careful with women—even one's own

mother! But you recite ‘Sri Lalitasahasranam' daily by heart. Not

everyone is capable of this. Some brahmins may do so, but you do it

with devotion and faith. When I hear ‘Sri Lalitasahasra-nam' I am

completely immersed. You can practice it the way I recite Akshara

Mana Malai—automatically it goes on. I may pick it up anywhere and

continue with it."

I described to Ramaswami the routine of morning and evening

recitations done at Arunachala Ashrama, stressing that we all recite

Mother's Names by heart. He said, "Regular parayana is good, but

Self-enquiry must be practiced always. . . continuously. By

practicing stotram regularly, one may acquire most of what one

desires in life. First one, like a child, asks of God and receives;

second, he will say, ‘Whatever You wish is best.'; finally, there

comes a state in which even to think is a sin. Thought itself will be

rejected.

"To think of many things makes a man weak!" he stressed. Talking of

the many popular gurus of the day, Ramaswami commented, "I have read

the books (this one or that one) that form the spiritual literature

of today. But when one comes to the practice, the ‘spiritual

literature' is something separate."

- by Evelyn Kaselow Saphier -- (To be continued)

THE MAHARSHI

March/April 1998Vol. 8 - No. 2

Produced & Edited byDennis HartelDr. Anil K. Sharma

 

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