The Ideal Man ( A repost )

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sierradelta2

 

I don't have the beauty of Hindu poetry to support this, as I am very

much a beginner in my studies, so all I can give you is the

considered opinion of a woman once widowed and once divorced:

 

The ideal man is the one who simply loves his woman. He is the one

she can rely on to "stand in the gap" when the world is too big to

handle, and events are too frightening to face alone. He is the one

who remembers if she thinks hothouse flowers smell like funeral homes-

-and brings her wildflowers from the meadow next door instead. If she

is upset, he is the strong shoulder and warm arms that comfort her.

He is passionate, but patient. He can be angry, but not violent. He

laughs with her joy, and shares her sorrows (and even cries, at least

upon occasion--he's human, too).

 

Of course, if he's REALLY perfect, he also remembers her birthday and

their anniversary. But if he's all the other "stuff" it won't be so

important, anyway.

 

But I also want to hear what the ancients had to say. And Rumi, too,

perhaps? (I am searching for Rumi's reincarnation--if only just to

listen....*sigh!*)

 

adi_shakti16

 

hey rose- i wish i had your fluency in 'english' and could write in

that language with such ease and elegance. But, where is

that 'rennaisance man'? gone are the days of roses and romance! i

think 'feminism' has really screwed it all up a big time for all

single mothers!!! (lol ) no chivalry! no red carpet treatment!

anyway, a littele shakespeare to brighten your daqy, rose!!!

 

[in The Merchant, Portia's three suitors must chose one of three

chests--of gold, of silver, or of lead--to win her hand. The suitor

choosing the chest with her picture will marry her. Each chest has an

inscription:]

 

The first, of gold, which this inscription bears: "Who chooseth me

shall gain what many men desire." The second, silver, which this

promise carries: "Who chooseth me shall get as much as he deserves."

This third, dull lead, with warning all as blunt, "Who chooseth me

must give and hazard all he hath."

 

The first suitor chooses the gold chest and reads the following

message:

 

All that glitters is not gold... Gilded tombs do worms infold...

 

The second suitor chooses the silver chest and reads the following

message:

 

Some there be that shadows kiss;

Such have but a shadow's bliss

There be fools alive iwis

Silvered o'er and so was this...

 

The third suitor whom Portia loves chooses the lead chest and sees

her picture: [While he is deciding, the following song is heard...]

 

Tell me, where is fancy bred,

Or in the heart, or in the head?

How begot, how nourished?

Reply, reply.

It is engend'red in the eyes,

With gazing fed, and fancy dies

In the cradle where it lie

Let us all ring fancy's knell

I'll begin it--Ding, dong, bell

Ding, dong, bell.

 

Bassanio, the suitor says, "So may the outward shows be least

themselves; the world is deceived with ornament." This view is

confirmed when he chooses the lead chest:

 

You that choose not by the view Chance as fair and choose as true...

 

 

Sugaranbrine

 

"i think 'feminism' has really screwed it all up a big time for all

single mothers!!!"

 

I must respectfully *disagree*.

 

Feminism has brought about great changes for women. As a woman (a

girl, really, at 26) I now have choices I never would have had in the

past. I can choose to go to work. I can choose who I marry or if I

want to marry at all. I can choose to learn to knit or sew or cook or

even fix cars. There are less expectations of me because of my gender.

 

Feminism is about the ability to make choices. Feminism is about

loving being a woman. It is about celebrating femininity.

 

Feminism is *not* about hating men or wanting to me a man. It is

quite the opposite.

 

Sure there are those out there that take things to the extreme (just

as Osama bin Laden is extreme in his way), but that does not speak

for the majority. I know many many girls and women that are involved

in the Third Wave of the feminist movement, and we all celebrate

lipstick and high heels and being a mother and knitting and being

feminine. We've come a long way from the bra burning days.

 

Feminism has not screwed anything up for anyone other than the

patriarchal societies and the misogynists of the world. Feminism has

opened doors and broken down barriers for us as women. Personally, I

feel it was long overdue. We still have a ways to go before society

as a whole sees us as being a mixture of mother and whore and teacher

and Goddess and therapist and all of those other amazing things that

we all are.

 

Adi_shakti16

 

OH ERICA!!! i luv every word you say in ur post!!! exactly!!! By

making that 'exaggerated' remark ( a hyperbole) what i was hinting

was we women have become so strong that men do not feel like

being 'protective' like before! like, opening the car door or'

hanging up the curtains' or 'plugging the leak in the toilet' or'

even changing the oil in our car.' it looks like , we do not need any

pampering any more ! but in reality, every woman luvs to be pampered!

Maybe not sonnets shakespearean style but definitely some 'roses'

once in a while, walking barefoot in the park holding hands etc....

 

luv your last para- 'we are mothers .....'

 

what i really meant was men think we can get along without them!!!

true, the moden woman is not 'co dependent' but every woman becomes a

complete woman only when she is 'loved, cherished and honored' by a

MAN. (totally)and vice-versa!!

 

'love is amany-splendored thing'

 

adi_shakti16

 

My Pretty Rose Tree by William Blake

 

A flower was offered to me:

Such a flower as May never bore.

But I said "I've a Pretty Rose-tree",

And I passed the sweet flower o'er.

 

Then I went to my Pretty Rose-tree:

To tend her by day and by night.

But my Rose turn'd away with jealousy:

And her thorns were my only delight.

 

 

Adi_shakti16

"I think; therefore I am single."

 

think about it! why r so many single women in washington, dc?

 

 

vicki70x7

 

Thank God we have come a long way from the bra-burning days! Back

then I was a divorced mother and could not get jobs for which i was

qualified simply because i was a woman! It hurt to be told "Our

GIRLS work in the steno pool; our BOYS work in the lab"

 

Not to mention, back then women, single or divorced could not get

credit any where. I was not a bra burner, but i thank those ladies

for what they did for our gender.

 

 

Sugarandbrine

 

I agree that women, in general, require some amount of romance and

roses and poetry. But by nature, I believe that most women are care

takers. But the feminist in me says "All women are different! We

should celebrate it!"

 

My "famous" example of differences between men and women:

 

If I go to my car and it won't start, I worry that the 1000 things I

had to do today will not get done because I have no transportation. I

can not pick up the dry cleaning, can not get to the post office, can

not pick up the kids from school, etc. It doesn't matter what is

wrong with the car, it only matters that the car will not start and

dang it! I have too many things to do for other people today...this

can't happen.

 

If a man had the same problem, he'd be more concerned as to why the

car wouldn't start and he'd want to figure out how to fix it. He'd

pop open the hood, see that it was just one tiny hose that was

busted, get a buddy to drive him to the auto parts store, buy a new

hose for less than five dollars, and fix the car.

 

This is why I believe we, as men and women, approach Mother

differently as well. I, as a woman, have a different sort of

relationship with Her than any man would. And the point is...that's

okay. We all approach situations differently depending on millions of

factors. If we understand that others are on their own path and are

seeking in their own way and *respect that* this world will be a much

happier place.

 

It's true that still waters run deep, but roaring waters have their

place on this earth as well. Without raging loud rivers there would

be no mountains.

 

Adi_shakti16

 

erica, i luv your style and admire your guts!!!!

 

i purposely write thw 'way' i do so people will open up and express

themselves!!! i do this with my kids (one daughter is about ur age)

and i will make such 'procovative statements then this girl of mine

who is normally like a church mouse (all quiet) will explode like

a 'volcano' -

 

that is what these forums are meant for - about relationships! inte-

personal!! not only with god/goddess or 10 mahavidyas but among

ourselveves!!! because the GODDESS INS YOU!!!!

 

IN THIS FASHION, WE PICK UP NOT ONE BUT MANY TRUTHS! what is tantra

if one does not have an open mind or open heart? does it mean keeping

a closed fist - keeping everything secret? confedential? that is why

i am all for yoni tantra!!!

 

DkSesh

 

Regarding keeping secret, there is a purpose. Usually the mantras

evoke certain siddis because of its vibrations and its purpose.

usually these siddis and its merrits are for the person who has

reached certain stage and knows how to handle the power. Such a

person will use the mantra as a stepping stone to go ahead.

 

People with lower maturity but only a zeal, curiosity or jelousy will

generally not be able to handle such powers. Sunch people will not

only misuse and waste such powers like an idiot squandering his

money, but, in the process will waste time as well. While these are

harmful to the individual in terms of loss of time, certain people

will harm others and temselves with it.

 

If you have observed, there are certain people, many who consider

that Trantra or Vedanta or any path for that matter is for siddis

only. they can't see beyond the arishadvargas. Such people can harm

others and themselves.

 

While the lord protects and provides, its a horrible thing to say

that we will not protect and keep a mantra secret for ego's

sake ,that all should have it, is carelessness. It shows the lack of

ability to clearly identify and bring up a person, with a mantra,

that is intended for the purpose/situation, and let lazyness rule

over in the name of dharmic goodness. Its laziness pampering ego, or

fame pampering ego or some element of arishadvarga pampering ego from

making use of correct and principled judgement as they use things of

power and knowledge.

 

A lot of examples are alore to illustrate it. The panchatantras

depict a smart monkey curious about wood slit and getting crushed.

If you read the autobiography of Swami Rama, Living with the

himalayan Masters you will find excellent information on it.

 

Nothing works where arishadvargas tend to leave their mark. Which is

why one has to keep the mind in lord always and live life for

him/her. So arishadvargaas or aham has no place to live.

 

For those prepared, the lord will come as a guru and teach. So long

as there is a sense of I people will fail to see it. The mantras and

the texts have a beeja rishi. Its this rishi who obtained it in his

superconscious state or in a divine state. It did not exist in

litrature before it. What this means is that they are all there...in

time..safe and sound..forever... only that why when u are ready to

get it, it will come to you on your own.

 

How many of you have read autobiography of a Yogi and the amulet that

Yogananda received. it comes and goes. So are the mantras. So do the

responsibilities on the mantras. All u need to do is to open your

eyes and see.

 

Hope this clarifies.

 

Wakeinbliss

 

You ended your post with 'all u need to do is open your eyes to see'

and beforehand your post was negative ,talking about how frustrated

your own ego is with religious pontification and religious

reiteration for your' masters ',when we all know the masters are

inward truths, neither eastern nor western in physical origin but

spiritual in birth and a term like 'master' is only as sound as the

comprehensions of the student. Im intersted to know what you think

You have mastered' other than cynisism *grin*just teasing

 

adi_shakti16

 

sesh, i agree with you on one thing and that is tantric practices

specially like panca makaras are for people of 'heroic' disposition

only - what is called 'vira sadhna' - even sri ramakrishna did not

advocate its use on a widespread basis- when we read about these

spiritual practices it is for information only not to practice them

without proper guidance from a qualified tantric guru!!!

 

BUT TO LOVE THE DIVINE MOTHER- NO PREREQUISITES OR TRAINING OR

GUIDANCE IS NECEESARY- that is beauty of shakti sadhna- you approach

the divine mother just like a small 'baby' totally 'naked' and

hungry! This is what silentsoulji has been discussing earlier and

nora and devi bhakta have also mentioned in their many posts!

 

we all know about the secrecy of 'bija' mantras and tantric practices-

they are for our own safety and welfare!!

 

but we are now discussing about 'yoni tantra'- and again, i repeat,

yoni tantra is NOT ABOUT SEX - IT IS NOT A TREATISE ON SEX-It is

about worshipping a woman ( the deity in the woman) in its entirety-

women are not just sex objects and are not meant for copulation

only!! (they are not ***bitches**** making puppies only- they are the

mothers of these puppies!) WOMEN ARE GODDESSES AND EVERY WOMAN IS

WORSHIPPABLE!!

 

in many parts of india, linga puja is performed -it does not mean

people are worshipping the 'phallus' -they are worshipping

the 'puruha' and the 'prakriti' and the linga is just a symbol. yoni

tantra is complex and is not practiced widely. by reading about it we

are not doing any harm to ourselves or others!!! if that was the

case , no translation would have been so readily on the net!!!

 

THE ONLY PRE-REQUISITE FOR ANY SPIRITUAL DISCIPLINE IS A DESIRE TO

KNOW AND REALIZE THE 'SELF' -ALL OTHERS ARE SECONDARY DETAILS !!

 

**************************************************

LET ME SHARE WITH YOU A STORY !

 

ThiCh Nhat Hahn:

 

"A woman who practices reciting Buddha Amitabha's name, is very tough

and recites "NAMO AMITABHA BUDDHA" three times daily. Although she is

doing this practice for over 10 years, she is still quite mean,

shouting at people all the time. She starts her practice lighting

incense and hitting a little bell. A friend wanted to teach her a

lesson, and just as she began her recitation, he came to her door and

called out: "miss Nuyen, miss Nuyen!".

 

As this was the time for her practice she got annoyed, but she said

to herself: "I have to struggle against my anger, so I will just

ignore it." And she continued: "NAMO AMITABHA BUDDHA, NAMO AMITABHA

BUDDHA..." But the man continued to shout her name, and she became

more and more oppressive. She struggled against it and wondered if

she should stop the recitation to give the man a piece of her mind,

but she continued reciting: "NAMO AMITABHA BUDDHA, NAMO AMITABHA

BUDDHA..." The man outside heard it and continued: "Miss Nuyen, miss

Nuyen..."

 

Then she could not stand it anymore, jumped up, slammed the door and

went to the gate and shouted: "Why do you have to behave like that? I

am doing my practice and you keep on shouting my name over and

over!" The gentleman smiled at her and said: "I just called your

name for ten minutes and you are so angry. You have been calling

Amitabha Buddha's name for more then ten years now; just imagine how

angry he must be by now!"