A Most Difficult Decision

[Guest guest]

Over the past few days, Shakti Sadhana's current moderators --

myself, Nora and Kochu -- met several times and finally arrived at a

most difficult decision: Any and all posts by adi_shakthi16 or any of

her avatars (asimhavahini, vinatha kumar, dkny1, geetangali ...

and numerous others) will not be posted in Shakti Sadhana. Those of

you who enjoy this person's posts can easily find them elsewhere; she

posts prolifically in many .

 

I stress that this person has not been banned. She is free to join

the Group as adi_shakthi16, and to read (and hopefully benefit from)

the posts of our other members. But she herself will not be allowed

to post under any name.

 

Our decision may come as a surprise to some, but it was anything but

rash and hasty: Nearly two years ago, when Nora and I first became

moderators at the then-new Shakti Sadhana club, the moderators of a

number of other Hinduism clubs and groups warned us of an asuric

presence, a person who was then using the ID, "gypsyqueenb" --

the very same person who is now best known as adi_shakthi16.

 

The more experienced moderators at these older Hinduism groups

advised us to ban this person at the outset, not to allow her to post

a single note in Shakti Sadhana. Nora and I disagreed: Everyone makes

mistakes, we argued. Everyone has the right to grow and change. Until

she attacks us personally, we will not ban her merely because she has

attacked others in the past.

 

And so I wrote adi_shakthi16 a note, introducing myself. We talked

about music, art, family. Nora did the same. For a while, our

strategy seemed to be working. As many of you know, adi_shakthi16 can

be a most friendly and appealing personality when it suits her

purposes: That is why is was so hard for us to believe that her aims

were entirely negative; and why many of you will find even this

message hard to believe. So taken in were we, that we briefly invited

adi_shakthi16 to act as a junior moderator (i.e. with limited ability

to ban members, approve posts, etc.) She soon demanded greater power.

We said, "wait a bit." But she quit, and the attacks began. Not

immediately, but by fits and starts, constantly growing in intensity.

 

Nora took the brunt of it; I got the same sort of thing to a lesser

degree -- adi's IM's and e-mails (all of which Nora saved and

forwarded to ) are a catalogue of hate -- she attacked us on the

basis of race, ethnicity, religion and spiritual beliefs, family

background, profession, errors we'd made in learning to be

moderators, even our children. Her communications were nothing short

of breathtaking in their viciousness. This was, it seems, adi's

reward for our naive attempts at friendship and trust.

 

Nora and I stuck to our guns for a while, and refused to permanently

ban her just the same -- for nearly two years we held out. Not that

we never wavered: I'd recommend banning adi after a particularly

vicious attack on me, and Nora would calm me down. Nora would

recommend banning when adi attacked her, and then I would be the one

advising patience. Throughout, adi tried to play us one against the

other: When Nora finally cut off adi's posting privileges, adi wrote

to me, asking me to change Nora's settings. I asked adi to simply

tone down a bit and use a new ID that wasn't banned -- that was the

birth of asimhavahini.

 

The final straw came when adi began an organized attempt to push

people away from Shakti Sadhana. Writing from the Group's e-mail

function or by messenger to many or most active members of the

Group, she smeared Nora and I to anyone who would listen to her,

including many of our close and valued friends. Some of them took her

advice, and left us. Others forwarded her mail to us, to warn us

about what she was up to.

 

adi_shakthi16 was insidiously selective in her attacks: She tended to

focus on our most serious and accomplished members; people whom she

knew we liked and enjoyed communicating with. In other words, the

people whose departure she knew would most hurt our feelings and

discourage me. And yes, she cost me some of these valued friendships.

But others stayed and encouraged me to hang in there. At the same

time, Nora was receiving the same sorts of "collateral attacks,"

worse than I endured, and adi's games cost her many friends as well.

Kochu, our newest moderator, also found himself the subject of her

maneuvers in recent weeks.

 

The attacks themselves are not the problem: We are all adults; we can

take it. The problem is the constant distraction from our avowed

purpose at Shakti Sadhana -- we, the moderators, are busy people with

busy lives, and we suspect that most of our members are as well. We

simply do not have the time to engage in an unending, petty soap

opera of personal attacks and vendettas. It is not good for the

Group, for its members -- it is not good for spiritual advancement or

sadhana of any kind.

 

So: How to express my feelings, now that we have finally thrown up

and hands and decided to ban her? I cannot express it better than Uma

( ID tatwamasi) did in July of 2001, at post #1372 at the

Spiritual Ecstacy and Meditation Group, which is still one of the

largest Hinduism Groups. Tatwamasi, as a moderator -- who had

endured harsh, sustained personal attacks by adi long before Shakti

Sadhana even existed -- fielded the following post (#1371) from

another SEM member who was also being attacked by adi:

 

"This woman ... is following me from club to club. She is trying to

harass others and using my name as the scapegoat. I

admit I once believed her lies concerning [the ]

and Spiritual Ecstasy And Meditation. I was wrong. ... I've since

learned that she has harassed clubs from as far back as Summer of

last year. She picks good clubs. I am not affiliated with this woman."

 

To illustrate that his experience is nothing new, the member then

quotes from another Group ("World of Dhayana, Post # 3022") from the

year 2000 to adi_shakthi16 (then gypsyqueenb): "Why do you use

multiple ID's? It is karma that is catching up with you. ... Please

stay away from me you have given me a bad name. I was wrong to

believe your earlier message about those two clubs. It is my fault

for doing so. That is the only thing I am guilty of. Stop following

me from club to club also Gypsy."

 

*************************

Tatwamasi responded:

 

"Unfortunately the founders of these and a few other clubs [not

yet "Shakti Sadhana,"have pampered her behavior and thereby

encouraged this negativity. You will also notice that the disturbed

person is probably painting an exact picture of

her own self through the harang.

 

"We reiterate our stand; DISCIPLINE and CONDEMN the behavior with

love and at the same time send light and prayers for

the disturbed soul and those who help this behavior flourish in the

name of spirituality.

 

"Spirituality is having the conviction of to stand firm

against irresponsible behavior. Many many gurus/leaders

of ashrams have had to remove disturbed people from disrupting

satsangh. They, like Mother, do so with love for

the child, praising the good deeds, giving firm discipline, all with

loving kindness.

 

"Again let usstand firm in taking responsible actions "where the mind

is without fear" and make our love stronger and

stronger so that storms that come and go may shake up some off some

of the leaves, but cannot touch the firm

trunk supported by diligent saadhanaa.

 

"We have already deleted another dozen or so abusive messages. Let us

move on with love. Hear, speak, only of love and

compassion. Hold your energies faar above this kind of low behavior,

learn how NOT to behave, and vigilantly remove

yourself from the presence of such energy.

 

"In meditation the monkey keeps taking our minds away from the goal.

Be vigilant, send love, gently remove the

disruptive thought and continue with the meditation.

 

"Peace to you all.

 

"Tat twam asi

 

"UMA

 

"PS. I ask again of members.. flood the board with love. No one can

penetrate that wall."

 

*************************

And now, two years later, and considerably sadder and wiser for the

experience, all I can do is repeat Uma's advice, and apply it to our

Group, Shakti Sadhana.

 

Aum Maatangyai Namahe