Guest guest Posted October 8, 2004 Report Share Posted October 8, 2004 Nora wrote: "This shall be my last message for this board and I shall not respond anymore, and this is what I have to say." Dear Nora: Last night, I received a call from my dear old friend, P___. He was at a hotel. His marriage is breaking up. Anna was on the cell phone with E____, his wife. We have all been good friends for years, long before we all married and settled down. They have a gorgeous home, beautiful young daughters, excellent professions. And now that is unraveling. It was in my dreams all night as I slept, and it weighed heavily on my thoughts this morning as I woke. Then I logged into and found this from you. It didn't even shock me; it just fit the mood. As with P___ and E___'s marriage dissolving before their (and my) eyes, it represents the victory of negativity and ill-will over positivity and good works. Am I being overly dramatic? Maybe, maybe not. But indulge me for a moment, all right? We are not married, of course. You have your S____, I have my A___. We have our lives. But in this project of Shakti Sadhana, we really are "married" -- in the sense that it's something enduring and beautiful that we built together with love and passion, laughter and tears. Together we faced all enemies, and emerged scarred but unbeaten. We explored new worlds, learned together, made mistakes together -- but always growing wiser and stronger. I am not saying this to make you stay if you do not want to stay. I am not saying it to make you feel bad. I celebrate those years in my heart, and will cherish them always. If it wasn't meant to last, so be it. Better to separate than to stay together in a poisoned atmosphere of resentment and mistrust. The group is Devi's and She is its only raison d'etre. But we are its twin human poles. For better or for worse, our personalities, in combination, defined the place. People felt the love and passion we brought to the group, the time we were willing to invest -- and they stayed. In the absense of that feeling, they will go, and they should. The group seems strong. It is growing, becoming the sheltering "oak tree" we once called it in a fairy tale we co- wrote in laughter. But it is still very young. Its roots are still deepening. It is vulnerable, and will not survive the strong wind you propose. It will begin to wither, like big trees do. Not all at once. Just fewer and fewer green branches each season, until it is but a shadow of its former self. I will not let it happen. The group and its people mean too much to me. If you wish to go, I will support your decision and will love you all the same. I will not try to stop you. But I will not stay and try to pretend that the tree is fine. Kochu and SE101 are teachers and brothers; Buttercookie61 has been a steadfast friend and supporter although her views often diverge from ours. But without you, something essential will be gone, and I will not stay and act as if it did not happen. I too will leave, and I will telphone you within the next few days (I am on vacation, and online irregularly) to plan our last great act together: Dismantling and closing the group -- just as our first great acts together were to create and to save it. We must not now leave it abandoned, a great bloated whale carcass, empty and sad like so many other big, dead . We must put it to rest with the same love and respect that it has always shown to us. We must work together one last time, and do this thing right. It is our duty. Will people care? Maybe a few, for a while. Maybe more. I always suspect that we made a lot of people happy, more than we'll ever know. A___ will probably be thrilled for a few days, trumpeting to everyone who'll listen that she knew it all along and predicted everything -- that she warned me about you; and warned you about me. No one will listen or care, of course, except her usual circle of cronies ... and she will soon lose interest and (under whatever new combination of ID's) move on to find new targets for her negativity and ill-will. Because yes, as I said above, this is a victory for negativity and ill will. But hatred can never breed joy. Her victory will still be as sterile as the group that she formed to mock us. And our loss will still be as sweet as the group that we built together. With all warmest wishes -- and yes, with love ... DB Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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