A little personal story and philosophy (warning: long-winded; response to Swastik)

[Guest guest]

Dear William,

 

I am glad that I have been able to have a positive

effect on you. However, I alone cannot be creditted

for my advice and effort - the wisdom of people I

consider spiritual mentors have helped me time and

time again in the past, from both this list and off

the list.

 

Love and hate, sometimes or more, are really on the

same coin, when you think about it. Both serve as

more than enough of an inspiration for all sort of

people to do things, whether those things end up good

or bad. However, it is up to us to try to learn how

to understand both and perhaps in time learn how to

balance all out. After all, (excuse me if I use a bit

of Buddhism jargon in this, Lol) is the way out of

suffering not the Middle Way?

 

I personally would not reject weakness too much. Too

much rejection leads to denial, and denial leads to

delusions and even illusions. I would embrace the

fact that one has weakness, but on the same level,

work on how to overcome such weaknesses and perhaps

even turn such weaknesses into strengths. For

instance, I am what one calls a book nerd, and I even

have a thing for perfection now and then...some see

this side of me a strength (it can be, since it drives

me to improve in life), but is it really healthy for

me, considering that it leaves me prone to questioning

my self-worth more often than not? So instead, I take

pains to understand that no one is perfect...but to

keep the positive aspects, I will use that drive to

take action when needed.

 

Another method to helping you, I believe, is

subliminating your energy into devotion...it will ease

the wounds on your heart, if not heal it all together.

The simplest thing I learned in the Psychology of

Religion, both the college course and listening to

other experiences, is the fact that faith helps people

deal with the tides in life.

 

If all else fails, though, there goes a saying...not

sure if someone else said it or if it was the Dalai

Lama who said it... "If there is a solution, do not

worry about it. If no solution exists, worrying will

not help."

 

As for Ma Kali, though I am still a student in

learning the Hindu Culture, she always spoke to me as

well. When I accepted the fact that I was a Pagan, I

just chose to go eclectic, not picking a grounding or

path at all. However, I eventually found myself drawn

to Kali (though did not put much effort into learning

about the Sanatana Dharma until a year or so

later)...since I started to believe that people

misunderstood her. I did not bother to search for

pictures or anything, but I decided to draw her like

how I would view her. I drew her with a set of arms

slaying down demons, then another set of arms

comfortng a baby. Then when I became a bit more

serious about my spiritual grounds, that is when I did

research and found this group...then I did more

studying on how Kali was viewed in the Sanatana

Dharma, then...well, I think you saw my report on her.

I found images of her slaying demons, but then I also

found that she has the nurturing side to her as well.

So, here I am now...lol...still learning, of course,

though probably at a slower pace due to college taking

my time. Otherwise, even when I have no nose stuck in

my Shaktism-related books, I always try to apply my

knowledge and spirituality in all aspects in my life.

 

 

I think I told you a bit on my dreams as well...which

strengthened my devotion. While I am involved with a

man right now, my faith and love in Devi precedes

all... Like you, I will not find any greater lover

like Devi. Anyone who finds out of my devotions can

scorn me, attack me with self-righteous vigor, and

other things...such attempts may lower my self-image,

but never turn me away from my dharma, no attempts

will turn me from the one I grew to love. I used to

be lost, but now I am complete (or more complete than

I was before, lol!).

 

I see myself as a warrior for her, in a way. Not that

I do anything devastating like declaring some holy war

and attacking other faiths, but in the sense that I am

majoring in Psychology to learn how to help others

fight their inner demons, while learning how to fight

my own demons as well. I am a warrior in the sense

that I wish to study more and more so that I may help

dispel the ignorance surrounding what I grew to love.

So even though I am not the most knowledgeable person,

I will use the knowledge I learn to help

others...while continuing to learn - that is how I see

myself as a warrior. If anything I do provokes any

bit of thinking, any bit of consideration, that is one

step to achieving my goal. Also like you, I would die

for the one I love as well...if I have nothing to die

for, then what do I have to live for?

 

Hang in there dear. You are not alone...not alone at

all. Even if no physical body surrounds you, you are

still not alone.

 

 

Blessings, as always,

An'ya/Christina

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

--- swastik108 wrote:

> Anya dearest,

>

>

> Your words and support fill my heart with joy and

> allow me to see through the doorways to great vists

> of happines..

>

> You made me smile. With love perhaps the world could

> be saved. Anything you have to say is a big help for

> me. Recently, I have had my heart broken. I was too

> attached to this girl for 7 1/2 years and found out

> she ws cheating. I cry almost everyday for it. Will

> I let it destory me? No! Now is the time to reject

> weakness and embrace the strengths within. I know

> there is infinite potential within that I can acces,

> I just wish I has tht right guru to do it.

>

> The other day at a bar someone asked me about

> Kali...Oh the words! They flowed seemless from the

> core of my being and the one boy had to leave

> because it overwhelmed him! These western people

> cannot understand what it means to be in love with a

> Goddes, I could die for her smiling, I could

> dedicate my life to her, I view my existence as an

> offering to her lotus feet and it feels me with

> purest just.

>

> I pray that Ma is knowing all things and guiding me

> the right way.

>

> Jay Ma! And all of you people especially ladies

> her,,,within you I see her as well. Focus on that,

>

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