parental issues...

[Guest guest]

Has anyone had any experience with others

shunning yoga? In my case, it's my mom. She won't outright

say that she disapproves of it, she just gives off

that air. Her thing to say is, "it's just yoga." But

it's not! It's not "just yoga" to me. It's more than

that. I've tried talking to my mom, but she won't tell

me anything specific. She doesn't know much about

it, but she won't learn about it either. I'm at the

point that I don't know what to do. I'm going to

college in KC, but she lives in Joplin. I've devoted so

much time to my practice, that I really need to stay

here over the summer and continue with my classes

(this is the closest city that offers Ashtanga--it's 2

hours from my mom's house). But I don't think she wants

to admit that I'm moving out of her house. How can I

make her realize that Ashtanga is a necessary part of

my life now? Has anyone had this

problem?<br><br>Lauren

[Guest guest]

Lauren,<br><br>Sorry for this long message, but

I've dealt with this a lot. I started doing yoga and

other "kookie" things when I was very young and my

parents are both sceptical people. God knows why they

named me Sunshine.<br><br>Now that I'm "all grown up"

(LOL) not much has changed. Well, my mom has since

re-married to a more open-minded person. Now she even does a

little yoga here and there herself. But my dad and

step-mom just never seem to be willing to strech their

minds on issues such as yoga and alternative medicine.

They are full-on believers in pharmaceuticals, and

full-on cynics about yoga and anything else

"alternative." When I visit them, they allow me the space and

place to practice, they let me eat my weird foods

without complaint. But still there is this skickering

look on their face, or more often the case now, a sort

of "you do your thing I'll do mine" sort of

attitude.<br><br>So just don't expect your mom to change. What will

change, for sure, is your attitude towards her and a

greater ability to remain peaceful even when confronted

or uncomfortable. It's important sometimes to

disengage from potential arguments, not get defensive about

our practice or lifestyle. Don't get too serious

about it with her; my folks and I get along better if I

can make fun of myself. That's can be difficult,

though. Our parents will always know just how to yank our

chains! )<br><br>P.S. Lauren I need your e-mail address

again; after you gave it to me, I never wrote it down!

[Guest guest]

thanks for the input. i just got off the phone

with my mom actually. she doesn't see why i need to

stay at school during the week over christmas break

just for yoga. oh well *sigh*...parents just don't

understand. i'll see her on wednesday night after my yoga

class...(we're flying to ohio to see my grandma). hmm...maybe

she'll at least watch me do my practice one day while

we're there. she's never seen it or anything like that.

sun, i lost your address as well! mine is

madonna_ashtanga<br><br>later gator!<br><br>louie

[Guest guest]

If I were your mom, and you told me you would

rather be with your yoga than visit me for a week (when

I hardly get to see you anymore, etc.), I would be

hurt. And not very supportive of something I perceive

as a threat in the first place.<br><br>Not to be

laying any guilt on you. In fact, I empathize 100%. My

parents' lack of understanding/interest in my collection

of groovy life choices has been driving me up the

friggin' wall for the last 15 or so years.<br><br>I just

hoped an outside perspective might provide light.

[Guest guest]

I have a small point to make ...<br><br>Your mum,

or your gran, or people you love, may not be around

when you want them to be, they may not be around for

long. There's nothing to stop u going to your mum's and

doing self practise... NOTHING. Eeven if you are a

total newbie , you can manage the sun salutations -

it's just for a week. <br><br>This is from someone who

has faced a certain amount of bereavement over the

last few weeks and is also suffering from guilt

because I forgot that, to some members of my family, a

vist from me was one of the things they most

wanted.<br><br>Yoga may be the most important thing in your life to

you... but if that's the case I'd take a good, long,

hard look at your life. Because, unless your family

have abused and mistreated you, you should treasure

their love.

[Guest guest]

Hey Blonde...<br><br>Sorry, friends, I have not

been able to post here for a week - not that you care!

Not sure what the problem was...internet shoppers

cloggin' up the roads, I think. Anyway, Blonde, you make a

great poiint. I wanted to respond to this earlier in

this manner. I lost my mother this year and am still

in a fog. I wonder if the poster regarding parental

issues is dealing with another reason on why she doesn't

want to go home for the week...it can't be simply

yoga...? If anything, I hope the yoga helps you deal with

some of the difficulties you/we all have with certain

relationships in our lives. Ii know it has helped me. Anyway,

good luck, and blonde, I am sorry for your loss(es)

this year. It sucks, I know...{hug} Sandy