Re:Does this look familiar...

[Guest guest]

Namasthe.

 

There are a lot of us who go through the loss of innocent trust in God

and there are few who are lucky to recover faith; and in this journey, we go

through the terrible anguish of spiritual destitution.It is in this journey

that the transmuting fire of tapas works its magic; and it is the doubt

which charms our mind with the longing and expectation of the distant vaikuntam.

It is kali yugam and the gross does cast its spell,the darkness does remind

us of the beauty of innocent joy if god decides so.After a fire what remains

is what can sustain even that fire; and in our journey towards vaikuntam

these fires of doubt and darkness must burn us.

During this journey,through this birth and through the births we have knotted

ourselves with our vasanas and karmas;the pattern of knots being 'unique'

and specific to the choices that we have made;and there is a magician who can

make these knots disappear and set us free again;the magician is as 'unique'

as the way we have knotted ourselves;to some the taraka mantram of Rama Nama

does the magic, to some it is the Krishna leela, to some it is the enoromous

effort of intellection and contemplation ;can there be a single way out?

 

It is probably our encounters with these knots that causes the annoying moments

of loss of faith and doubts and spiritual anguish;but do we have much choice

except to wait for that magician- our ishta devatha?

 

The anguish,longing and bliss during this journey to vaikunta of many saints

comes down to us as the poetry of their soul;it is Meera's search for vrindavan

and her longing for krishna's voice(Hari Avan ki avAz..);it is gopika geetham;

it is Annamacharyas longin for the Lords voice(Paluke bangaramayena?);and

Tyagaraja's tears and songs...I am sure if our longing and cry is sincere,

that magician will come,the delay is probably for us to clear our eyes

and make our minds transparent so that we may see him and recognize him.

 

 

These thoughts are written spontaneously since I too know the pain of 'loss

of faith';I requset others to correct any errors in my understanding that are

bound to be there.

 

 

With Pranams.

Murali Manohar