Thiruvaaymozhi 7.7-His Beauty torments me and is killing me!

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SrI:

 

Dearest Sisters and Brothers,

 

In the last ten AzhwAr longed and yearned for seeing the Most Beautiful

exquisitely beautiful form of Emperumaan and had an urgent dvarai to see

His form. He even, out of his longing for His Physical Body, extended

his hands to hug Him tightly. When AzhwAr finds Him NOT present there,

he gets into the "Piraatti bhAvam- NayikA bhavam" and suffers from

severe pangs of separation. Here, in this ten she explains Emperumaan's

Divya Sowndharyam and regrets and laments that she is NOT able to join

Him. She also narrates that His Divine Beauty has become yaman (cause

for her dying). In this Thiruvaaymozhi, AzhwAr's love and frustrations

due to Emperumaan's beauty, are narrated equally and in AzhwAr's lovely

style.

 

1. Oh my dear friends and my ammA! Those large Lotus eyes of Blue hued

Ocean colour KaNNan are bent upon drinking the lives of poor foolish

young innocent girls and are like Yama for them. May be there are two

yamans (in the form of His two lovely eyes!). He really KILLS them with

His eyes and His looks. Whenever and wherever you see His eyes, His eyes

are always like the fresh just bloomed Red Lotus flowers. His attractive

look alone is enough to kill me and torment me! I am mad after that eyes

and His sight; What can I do?

 

2. Oh Mothers! You talk about me and let others also know of my pitiable

suffering state; that makes me more sad and more hurt. What is the use

of your such talking about me? KaNNan- The One who stole and ate the

butter that was just churned and was still warm- the Butter thief- His

lovely, sharp, creeper like nose- that beauty has allured me. His sharp,

long nose, is a streamlined creeper (of kaRpakaa) like beauty. That

sight of "lovely" great sharp pristine nose has entered into my heart

and lit a jyOthi in me. That jYothi aggravates my Viraha thaapam and

enhances its lustre thereby troubling me furthermore with more strength.

 

3. Emperumaan's ThirumEnI (Divine Body of Suddha satvam) is a blue hued

dark cloud like colour. (He is neela mEgha shyaamaLan). His red lips are

so reddish in colour like the bimbhA fruit. When we look at His lips,

they remind us the slices of sweet tastiest fruit. Does it look like a

fruit to me? Or have they come in such a cute round, fruit like form to

completely arrest me with its beauty? In order to avoid such a

(suffering) troubling by looking at those lovely lips, I try to see

somewhere else. But wherever I see, whichever direction it is, those

lips appear in front of my eyes, only with a view to torturing me! I

simply can Not escape the lure of His Beautiful mouth. (AzhwAr's

anubhavam is so lovely!) (kaRpooram naaRumO? Kamalappoo naaRumO? Un

thiruppavaLach chevvaay thaan thitthirukkumO? says Sri AndAL- Does that

smell so fragrantly like the Camphor or like the Lotus? Does that Red

Coral lipped mouth taste sweet? Do you know whom does she ask? She asks

the Sanghu (Divine Conch), since that has tasted His sweet red lips,

when He blows it.)

 

4. Bhagawaan KaNNan is the dearest father of Manamthan (Cupid). I think

His (KaNNan's) eyebrows are the dark bows that have come to suck the

lives of women, with its tremendous beauty. Or are they the bows of

Manmathan? (in order to entice the women?). Wherever I look, those brows

are bent upon killing me with their beauty! What can I do? Those

eyebrows run so curved above those eyes that I suffer terribly (longing

for Him to a great extent).

 

5. KaNNan- The One who lifted the Govardhana mountain like an umbrella-

His smile- What a beauty that smile IS! His "punsirippu" (smile) is like

a permanent lustrous whitish lightning. Or is it a group of beautiful

pearls, that have come to kill me? Oh Mothers! I don't know what to do.

When His such a sweet smile kills so terribly, is there any other place

that I can hide from that? He stays everywhere (and kills me with that

smile.) (Dearest Sisters and Brothers, The smile actually is a beauty.

You look at anyone when he or she smiles. It is beautiful to look at.

More so, when the Beauty itself smiles. I always used to imagine and

enjoy Kutti KaNNan, (about two year and half old) who walks with almost

no dress, except that lovely Gold araignAN, and a small metallic piece

tied to it which hides "it". He runs, rolls on the roads (with His

friends), steals and eats butter, again plays on the streets, with the

result the entire body is full of dust, butter, sticky, dirt.

"kaaNaperidhum uvakkum"- A great sight to see and enjoy. When YasOdhA

sees Him, she comes with such an anger and fire in her eyes, that she is

definitely going to beat Him. Our Dearest Kutti, can fool anyone. He

just looks at her and SMILES. HER HEART MELTS AND ALL HER ANGER HAS GONE

AWAY! SHE HUGS HIM AND LIFTS HIM IN HER HANDS AND KISSES HIM AND HIS

BEAUTIFUL DIRTY THIRUMENI, SIMPLY ENJOYING THE SMILING FACE. Swami

Desikan in his Bhagavdhyaana Sophaanam, Sloka 8, "saabhipraaya smitha

vikasitham…." says that Lord's smile understands the earlier zigs and

zags of Prapanna and does not reveal the depth of apachaarams of

prapannas. He understands us and understandably smiles and protects us,

in spite of our enormous great sins, simply because we have just

surrendered to Him, that too pretend surrendering to Him, which too

happens in us with His mercy. The smile lights up His face like a fully

blossomed Lotus (smitha vikasitham))

 

6. Emperumaan- the One who has as His bed, the AdhisEshan- His

"kundalangaL" (the ear studs?) in His ears can attract anyone with its

shining Beauty, adorning His long, lovely, tender leaf-like ears. They

are the ones that torment the women folks. Where is their asylum for

such pitiable women who get allured by Emperumaan's beauties? The asurAs

and rAkshasAs get killed by seeing such beautiful ears! (by not being

able to bear His shining lustre) and women, by not being able to bear

the sight of such Beautiful ears, get troubled by those ears. The ears

simply kill them with their beauties.

 

7. Oh Mothers! I do not know the way to describe the way how His

Divinely Beautiful "crescent like forehead makes me suffer! His four

shoulders, His Most beautiful Face (Thirumukham) are so cute. His face

is like the ashtami chandran (moon on ashtami day). Or is His face a

poisonous beautiful leaf? His Beauty is extremely strong to torment me

terribly and captures my jIvan completely. (kambhanaattazhwAn, Tamil

Poet, writes about Rama when He walks in the forest along with SitA and

Lakshmana: "maiyO? MaragadhamO? MaRikadalO? mazhaimigilO? AiyO ivan

azhagenna azhiyaa azhagudaiyaan.." meaning: Is He dark "mai"? (and black

collyerium for decorating eyes). Is He Maragadham? (The Costly Valuable

Blue Emerald stone - neela maNikkakal). Kambhan still was not satisfied.

He feels he is NOT doing justice. So he says: maRikadalO? Is He the Blue

Ocean? (to compare His colour and the guNA- Ocean colour and ocean of

mercy . But he is still Not happy because the sea is salty and is NOT

drinkable. But the Lord is Aaraavamudhan. Insatiable nectarine drink is

He. So He ends : MazhaimugilO-the Dark clouds? That can be compared to

His colour as well as His "mercy" that rains on His bhakthAs. Still some

hitch in Kambhan's mind. He says: I give up. Words do not come to my

rescue. AiYo! What a Beauty is He! He is eternal Beauty! )

 

8. (in all previous pAsurams, AzhwAr was caught by the individual attack

of each part- Now all jointly attack our poor AzhwAr. He is trapped!- He

is so fortunate that Emperumaan's Beauty chases him!). The eyes- that

has the ornament as its own Beauty- The creeper like sharp nose, The Red

coral lips, The eye b®ows, The milky white teeth which have got their

brightness and shine as their ornaments, The tender leaf like ears, the

moon like face, - They all have formed an alliance and jointly combine

to form a Divya MangaLa Divinely exquisitely Beautiful form in His face

and that face has become a jYOthi mandalam, which houses everything in

it. Such a Beautiful face, is causing me enormous sufferings and viraha

thaapam and literally kills me!

 

9. Oh Mothers! Look at His long dark hair on His Head! What a Beauty

that also is! Looks like That has been made of the darkness, as its

strands. His dark hair is like the Darkness that was spread everywhere

during Cosmic cycle end (when even the Sun was Not there) and it appears

that the darkest essence of such darkness has become His hair! Whatever

one attempts to compare the darkness and the beauty of His hair, it is

STILL NOT adequate. His hair has got the Divine fragrance of the

Thirutthuzhaay! (that adorns His Head always!). That fragrance is the

One that lured me, mothers! That is the one which has robbed my heart!

Do you all know that? Without knowing the plight of my sufferings (and

the capacity or strength of His Beautiful Dark hair which kills me), you

all are talking all sorts of things about me and scold me. Why?

 

10. Oh Mothers! You all are scolding me "why are you standing at the

entrance, Why are you standing here? Why there?" and are abusing me?

What can I do for that? My heart had already been lost to Emperumaan ,

The Most lustrous, shining form of all three worlds! After loosing

myself to Him, how do you all think of getting me back, at all?

(impossible!)

 

11. Even BrahmA, Sivan, Indran all devAs, (who can not be seen by

ordinary people (like us)), can NOT aspire to see with their eyes, Sri

krishnan. About Him, Sri SadagOpar of Thirukkurugoor, has composed 1000

pAsurams and those who read these ten (out of 1000) will JOIN NityasUris

at Sri Vaikuntam and ENJOY EMPERUMAAN ETERNALLY FOR EVER AND EVER.

 

NammAzhwAr ThiruvadiagaLE SaraNam

 

Ram Ram

 

With Best Regards

 

NarayaNa dAsan madhavakkannan

 

 

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