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Dear List,

 

Thank you for being here. This is a time of great need, as it seems lately

that worldly attachments and desires have returned, seemingly out of

nowhere. Sadhana is almost exclusively viveka and vairagya (jnana) as set

forth by Sri Ramana Maharshi and Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj, but lately

neither seem to be effective. In the course of one week, whatever

spiritual "progress" I thought I had made seems to have vanished. This

comes as a great shock, because I was *sure* that things were otherwise.

 

Perhaps this is only a temporary setback. I think it is. The inner Guru

(Sadguru) has not abandoned, is still there and is telling me things. This

may be a great fork in the road, a turning point.

 

Perhaps now, the heart can only bridge the gap which the mind has created.

Lately I have been feeling that to be as innocent, gentle and pure as a

kitten is the only way to see through the illusions of Maya, which have

become so deceptive at this time in history that it takes almost a miracle

to see beyond them.

 

Om Gum Gurubyho Namaha,

 

Tim

 

-----

The past is memory, the future imaginary. Be Here Now.

 

Visit "The Core" Website at http://coresite.cjb.net -

Music, Poetry, Writings on Nondual Spiritual Topics.

Tim's other pages are at: http://core.vdirect.net.

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Tim Gerchmez wrote:

>

> Dear List,

>

> Thank you for being here. This is a time of great need, as it seems lately

> that worldly attachments and desires have returned, seemingly out of

> nowhere. Sadhana is almost exclusively viveka and vairagya (jnana) as set

> forth by Sri Ramana Maharshi and Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj, but lately

> neither seem to be effective. In the course of one week, whatever

> spiritual "progress" I thought I had made seems to have vanished. This

> comes as a great shock, because I was *sure* that things were otherwise.

>

 

welcome back, tim...

 

hariH OM!

 

how much of you is being described here?

 

the mind has a knack of focussing on [such]

limited concepts. in this case, problems,

and causing them to loom out of proportion.

the common process is one of forgetfulness...

forgetfulness of what one is in truth, which

is unknowable and free.

 

if i happen to have a negative thought, it

is merely a fraction of my totality. to my

understanding, and my preference, i'd rather

not dismiss it as unreal; instead it is

something so infinitesimally minute as to

be holistically insignificant.

 

the habit of judging others is one treachery;

the habit of judging oneself is even worse.

the ego is created and sustained by judgments.

judgments are its spark and fuel.

 

defining, categorizing, assessing this moment

and that, is the Great Doing that undoes I AM!

or *appears* to! never more than appearance!!

 

on the other hand,

all that exists, within/without is pure mystery.

moksha follows on the trail of this.

 

om shaanthi

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At 01:08 AM 4/9/2000 -0400, you wrote:

>welcome back, tim...

>

>hariH OM!

 

Thank you for the kind welcome :-)

>how much of you is being described here?

 

It's difficult to tell, because the apparent movement toward forgetfulness

has only been there for less than a week. I have found in the past that in

general, it has only been temporary, but this instance has been more

dramatic than others.

>the mind has a knack of focussing on [such] limited concepts. in this

case, >problems, and causing them to loom out of proportion.

>the common process is one of forgetfulness... forgetfulness of what one is

in >truth, which is unknowable and free.

 

Yes, understood... this forgetfulness is great sorrow.

>if i happen to have a negative thought, it is merely a fraction of my

>totality. to my understanding, and my preference, i'd rather

>not dismiss it as unreal; instead it is something so infinitesimally

minute as >to be holistically insignificant.

 

That has also been my understanding, but lately there has also been

forgetfulness of the insignificance of the negativity as well. This is

something I have not experienced before. Generally I am aware constantly

(perhaps even in the dreaming state) of the temporality, impermanence and

insignificance (even dreamlike quality) of anything perceivable or

conceivable, but lately this awareness has diminished greatly and almost

vanished.

>the habit of judging others is one treachery; the habit of judging oneself

is >even worse. the ego is created and sustained by judgments. judgments

are its >spark and fuel.

 

That's why I'm tending to look at this as a temporary "dip" into bhoga.

It's likely that an active Sadhana including regular meditation, work with

mantra and other is going to have to be implemented. That is, if I can

find the inner drive and energy necessary to devote myself to this.

Something is creating a predominance of tamas and much more rajas than

usual, which is strange because in general the life I lead and everything I

do is in the direction or service of Sattva. I even wonder if this strange

overactivity of the sun, solar storms, has something to do with it. As far

as looking from within the realm of Maya, circumstances beyond control can

play a large role in things sometimes. Even a full moon can alter moods.

>defining, categorizing, assessing this moment and that, is the Great Doing

>that undoes I AM! or *appears* to! never more than appearance!!

 

Understood as well. What I am, I am always, and nothing changes it, only

obscuring influences make it less visible or perceivable. Still, the mind

keeps questioning: Why has the "mirror" suddenly become cloudy, when before

it was a much clearer reflection of my true nature? This is a question

that still has no answer. Perhaps it's an unimportant question. The

important thing is to dive into Sadhana, wasting no time. And to watch

this obscuring tendency carefully - perhaps a cause can be determined.

>om shaanthi

 

Hari OM

 

Om Gum Ganapatayei Namaha

 

-----

"Past" is a synonym for "memory." Be intensely focused

in the NOW, as the Witness. Time is purely an illusion

created by memory, and the personality is a product of

memory. "Be Here Now" is a timeless and vital formula.

 

Visit "The Core" Website at http://coresite.cjb.net -

Music, Poetry, Writings on Nondual Spiritual Topics.

Tim's other pages are at: http://core.vdirect.net.

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Tim Gerchmez wrote:

> [...] What I am, I am always, and nothing changes it, only

> obscuring influences make it less visible or perceivable. Still, the mind

> keeps questioning: Why has the "mirror" suddenly become cloudy, when before

> it was a much clearer reflection of my true nature?

 

ahA! who's the perceiver?

 

the relative mind is expecting Absolute experience.

impossible!

 

as sri ramana asks us, "are there two selves?

one to BE and the other to perceive its BEING?"

 

all such attempts and successes are temporal dupes!

 

the Self is all there is. its mysterious projection

in/of maya is its sport, leela. how it unfolds is

ultimately not our burden. we can call it prarabdha

karma unfolding, and stay the course of the witness.

this can work for some. others are better served

realizing the real fact behind the scenes: that it's

a pure mystery. which can deliver a blow the ego

will have no way of parrying! without its safeguards

of logic and knowledge, it must and will crumble.

 

TATTVAMASI!

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>

> f. maiello [egodust]

>

> the habit of judging others is one treachery;

> the habit of judging oneself is even worse.

> the ego is created and sustained by judgments.

> judgments are its spark and fuel.

WONDERFUL SAYING! THANK YOU.

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At 09:07 AM 4/9/2000 +0300, you wrote:

>>

>> f. maiello [egodust]

>>

>> the habit of judging others is one treachery;

>> the habit of judging oneself is even worse.

>> the ego is created and sustained by judgments.

>> judgments are its spark and fuel.

>WONDERFUL SAYING! THANK YOU.

 

I'll echo that, with only one small difference. As others are not

different than ourselves, it could only be that the habit of judging others

is identical to that of judging ourselves, and both equally bad habits, in

that doing so obscures the reality... that "I" am not different than "you"

in essence! (and even in very many thoughts). When we judge others we

judge ourselves, and in judging ourselves we implicate the universe.

 

Many sages have pointed out that karma is mostly a shared phenomenon; that

we are dreaming the dream of the world, and dreaming of each other. To

know that we are dreaming is the beginning of the end of the dream.

 

OM: Shanthi,

 

Tim

 

-----

"Past" is a synonym for "memory." Be intensely focused

in the NOW, as the Witness. Time is purely an illusion

created by memory, and the personality is a product of

memory. "Be Here Now" is a timeless and vital formula.

 

Visit "The Core" Website at http://coresite.cjb.net -

Music, Poetry, Writings on Nondual Spiritual Topics.

Tim's other pages are at: http://core.vdirect.net.

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