A Little about Myself

[Guest guest]

Friends,

 

I read about your list both on NondualitySalon and Harshasatsangh. I belong

to both lists although I'm a relatively new arrival to each of them. I've

been interested in spiritual life since I was 13 or so, initiating my

involvment with an interest in D.T.Suzuki and japanese Zen. Around 1976 I

took Saktipat initiation from Baba Muktananda. I spent 1/2 a year in India

with him, and joined him in his 2nd and 3rd world tours, although only at the

East and West coast locations here in the States.I had a final personal

darshan to discuss an overwhelming experience I had had in meditation that

had bled over onto my waking life. He certified that it was a high and

valuable experience and that I could proceed ahead firmly in the knowledge

that I was in the hands of the Inner Guru and the Shakti.

 

That was the last that I saw of him before his Mahasamadhi. When the ashram

changed hands and Gurumai and her younger brother,Swami Nityananda, took over

things began to change. With the expulsion of Nityananda, there was a general

housecleaning involving many of the Western Swamis that had taken initiation

from the Mahamandeleshvar under Baba's supervision. I was already such an

independant figure that my own status wasn't brought into question, but aside

from the Guru Gita and the bhajan's, I had only a tentative connection with

the new order of things. I felt that my own affiliation with Baba and the

Sakti was ongoing and sometimes overwhelming, so I felt no need of further

personal guidance from his heirs. Further, I had very bad feelings about

George Afif, the ashram Manager under Gurumai who had become almost a

suffogate Guru, well before his sexual troubles with minors, and I was

unwilling to submit to his direction.

 

All of this took place between 1976 and 1983-4. Since that time I've had a

very active sadhana on my own. I lived in Ithaca,NY for a time, and

considered myself an outboard member of Anthony Damiano's Wisdom's Goldenrod.

As a result of my affiiliation there I was graced with two small private

darshan's with HH the Dalai Lama, which have been the external highlights of

my yogic career since Baba's passing. During Baba's lifetime I also

participated in the 16th Karmapa's Black Crown ceremony, another highpoint in

my spiritual career.

 

For the last 20 years or so I've been on my own. Final realization has

elluded me and I feel that I've good reason to know that I won't achieve it

in this lifetime. My connection with the Sakti and the"inner Guru" is ongoing

and intense.

 

I hope this answers your concerns, and that I haven't bored you with too much

detail.

 

Sincerely,

Eric BLackstead