Consciousness and the Absolute

[Guest guest]

June 27, 1981

 

 

 

Maharaj: The sprouting of Aham Brahmasmi takes place at some subtle place and

when it grows, it grows continuously. What is the meaning of this sprouting?

It indicates that I am the Brahman; then the inspiration, the intuition, begins.

The deeper meaning of Aham Brahmasmi means an intuitive, inspirational growth

from inside, the firm conviction that I am the Brahman. Such a one in whom this

growth of Aham Brahmasmi starts might undergo suffering, but that one will not

lose his understanding or this sprouting of Aham Brahmasmi. That is firmly

rooted. "Aham Brahmasmi" means that "I am the Brahman", but before saying " I

am the Brahman". You are already one with Brahman, and then only will you be

able to say, "I am the Brahman". It is just like the waking state. After

awakening, you might say, "I woke up." So the waking state precedes your saying

"I woke up."

 

There are two ways of receiving knowledge. One way is you are taught the

knowledge, you receive it externally. Another way is, the knowledge grows form

inside, intuitively.

 

So far, have you understood your Self by yourself? You have not yet seen

your Self, so how can you be convinced of what you are? Whatever you are

identifying yourself with at the moment is only the body and the intellect in

your body.

 

Questioner: One has to use the intellect to understand. I have been reading a

lot. Maybe it will take some time to try to develop a deeper emotional

understanding?

 

M: To understand what you are, and ultimately to identify with the Self that

you are, you must meet someone who had identified himself with the Self and also

who has understood the Self thoroughly. Have you come across that identity of

yours?

 

Q: No. I have seen it in other people. That impels one to try to find it in

oneself.

 

M: When you look at others, that other person is just food essence, as

yourself. What more understanding do you have? What it the quintessence of what

you are, the inner core of you?

 

When you people come here, you feel very satisfied and contented. Why?

You feel like that because when you are here, you are under the shade of, or you

abide in, your own consciousness. That means you are in a state, which

transcends body-mind and intellect. Since you are in that state, you do not

have any form, you do not have any doubts; therefore, you are in that satisfied

state. In that state, whatever sentences you hear will be implanted deeply in

you and will not be forgotten. There is no way for you to forget those

sentences because they lead you to your Self. What you hear, you will not

forget when you leave. Abide in this state of shade, in the Self, in the

consciousness that you are, even when you go out. Here there is no room for the

intellect to play about. Since you do not identify yourself with any form, mind

has no avenue for any propagation; the mind subsides in the consciousness. This

is space-like, a shade-like state.

 

Q: If you are in that state of beingness, is it necessary to say one's mantra?

 

M: Suppose you are a woman and you have not been accepting yourself as a woman,

so you are told you are a woman. This is the mantra "I am a woman, I am a

woman." When you are convinced you are a woman, are you going to repeat, " I am

a woman, I am a woman"? When you are THAT there is no question of choice.

Choice is at the level of body-mind, whether to say the mantra or not to say it.

 

Q: When consciousness, begins to become aware of itself one would logically

think that it would merge in itself. But so often it slips back into

identifying itself with the body. Why?

 

M: Why should consciousness, which is inadequacy, which is sickness, be there

at all? To a jnani, consciousness has not happened at all. If the

consciousness tries to understand itself, it gets stabilized in due course in

the Absolute. And when the consciousness gets stabilize in the Absolute, it

knows it is like a ghost, it is not real. It is not palpable.

 

You did not know your own existence after you were born. Nine months in

the womb and for sometime afterwards that "I am so and so" is absent. When you

start recognizing your mother, then you also come to be aware of you own

existence. That " I Amness comes sometimes later. Mother teaches you, in

ignorance, that you are the body and you begin to believe that. Your mind also

starts slowly to develop. So right from the beginning, because of ignorance,

the Absolute does not know itself; and because of the body, it started knowing

that it is-"I AM". Because of the ignorance you had to ask somebody " who am

I?" otherwise you would not have asked somebody " who am I?" otherwise, you

would not have asked anybody. Even so called incarnations such as Rama were

like this, they had to be taught. The incarnations are just like you. The

bondage with the body came because of wrong teaching, and then the guru came and

told you that you are not the body, and then you were liberated.

 

That is why all these births are taking place. If you knew of bondage, you

would refuse the birth. But because the "I Amness" is absent, you are trapped.

Because the "I Amness" is the quality of the body, later on you come to know you

are and that you are trapped.

 

But once you know, you are liberated.