Ramana's hug of Annamalai Swami - From the Maharshi News Letters

[Guest guest]

I got this story from the

HS website. Originally from the Maharshi Newsletters.

"Annamalai

Swami"

Annamalai Swami, a

lifelong devotee of Sri Ramana Maharshi, was absorbed in his Master on

November 9, 1995. He was 89-years-old. The Swami's remarkable story was

edited by David Godman and published in 1994 by the Sri Annamalai Swami

Ashram Trust.

Annamalai Swami

came to the Maharshi in 1928 and, at the Sage's behest, undertook the

supervision in the construction of the Goshala (cow shed), Dining Hall,

Dispensary and various other projects. In the mid-1940s, Bhagavan

instructed him to leave the ashram and engage in intense sadhana. He

would then occasionally meet the Maharshi on his walks, but never again

in the fifty years that followed did he reenter Sri Ramanasramam,

preferring to live a quiet, austere life in Palakottu. His small ashram

borders the western boundary of Sri Ramanasramam and he was well known

to many devotees and visitors to Tiruvannamalai.

In the passage

below, excerpted from Living By the Words Of Bhagavan, Annamalai Swami

relates the incidents preceding his departure from Sri Ramanasramam.

My days as an

ashram worker were coming to a close, although I didn't realize it at

the time. In retrospect I can remember only one small incident which

indicated that Bhagavan knew that my time in the ashram was coming to

an end.

I was doing some

digging with a crowbar when Bhagavan came and asked me, "Did you decide

to do this work yourself or did Chinnaswami ask you to do it?"

I told him that

Chinnaswami had asked me to do it. Bhagavan was not very pleased.

"So, he has given

you work. So, he has given you work. Why is he giving you work like

this?"

A little later

Yogi Ramiah remarked to Bhagavan, "Annamalai Swami is working very

hard. His body has become very weak. You should give him some rest."

Bhagavan agreed

with him. "Yes, we have to give him some rest. We have to give freedom

to him."

A few days later I

went to Bhagavan's bathroom to help him with his morning bath. Madhava

Swami and I gave him the usual oil bath and massage.

When the bath was

over Madhava Swami asked a question: "Bhagavan, the people who take

ganja lehiyam (an ayurvedic preparation whose principal ingredient is

cannabis) experience some kind of ananda (bliss). What is the nature of

this ananda ? Is it the same ananda that the scriptures speak of?"

"Eating this ganja

is a very bad habit," replied Bhagavan. Then, laughing loudly, he came

over to me, hugged me and called out, "Ananda! Ananda! This is how

these ganja-taking people behave!"

It was not a brief

hug. Madhava Swami told me later that he held me tightly for about two

minutes. After the first few seconds I completely lost awareness of my

body and the world. Initially, there was a feeling of happiness and

bliss, but this soon gave way to a state in which there were no

feelings and no experiences. I did not lose consciousness, I just

ceased to be aware of anything that was going on around me. I remained

in this state for about fifteen minutes. When I recovered my usual

world-consciousness I was standing alone in the bathroom. Madhava Swami

and Bhagavan had long since departed for breakfast. I had not seen them

open the door and leave, nor had I heard the breakfast bell.

This experience

completely changed my life. As soon as I recovered normal consciousness

I knew that my working life at Sri Ramanasramam had come to an end. I

knew that henceforth I would be living outside the ashram and spending

most of my time in meditation. There was a rule that only those who

worked for the ashram could live there full-time. Those who wanted to

spend their time in meditation had to live somewhere else. I thus knew

that I would have to leave the ashram and fend for myself, but the

thought of losing my regular meals and my room never troubled me.

I made a belated

appearance in the dining room to eat my last breakfast. As soon as I

had finished eating I went up onto the hill to look for Bhagavan. I

found him sitting on a big rock.

"I have decided to

leave the ashram," I said. "I want to go to Palakottu to live alone and

meditate."

"Ah! Very good!

Very good! Very good!" exclaimed Bhagavan. The decision clearly had his

approval. How could it be otherwise since it was Bhagavan himself who

gave me the experience which precipitated the decision?

After getting

Bhagavan's permission I packed my possessions and locked my room. I

also locked all the other places that were in my charge. I took the

bunch of keys to Chinnaswami and told him, "I have decided to go and

live in Palakottu. Please take these keys and keep them."

Chinnaswami was,

quite naturally, very surprised. "Why are you leaving?" he asked. "You

have constructed all these buildings. You have done so much here. How

can you go after doing all this work? Where will you sleep? How will

you eat? You will have many troubles because you have no way of

supporting yourself. Don't go, stay here."

I told him that I

would not change my mind. I also tried to give him the keys but he

refused to accept them. I didn't want another argument with him so I

just handed over the keys to Subramaniam, who was also in the office,

and left.

It was an abrupt

change in my life. Within a few hours of having the experience I was

walking to Palakottu, knowing full well that I had left all of my old

working life behind me."