believe

[Guest guest]

Dear Arghyo<br><br>Your question hits at the

toughest part of my sadhna. “Thy will, not my will.”

Faith. I am often asked this question IRL in our

discussion groups, and I can share a little of my personal

experience in case it triggers some thoughts for others

here. <br><br>My personal path began purely with

gaining of knowledge in an attempt to understand

"reality” or ‘Truth’ from a wide and apparently different

points of view including psychology and western

metaphysics. To quote my soulfriend “ reality is realized in

stages – appearance, empirical, experience.” I started

at the empirical stage.<br><br>As I understood the

basis of the Creative Intelligence that exists within

us, the creation process itself through the study of

energy, the various paths of yoga etc., I began to get a

tiny glimpse of the majesty that we are a part of and

what we deny by living in ignorance. After a while,

book learning wasn’t enough, I began the stage of

meditation looking for direct experience of that Creative

Intelligence. Meanwhile as I applied my learning to real life I

realized the importance of Faith.<br><br>My understanding

of yoga teaches me that unless I desire with intent

I cannot achieve; both material and spiritual

achievements. Achievements, I discovered, depend not on the

desire itself but our attachments to it. Attachments

represent aspects of our self which need healing/cleansing

and gets in the way of pure creation. I experienced

for myself, that the key to achieving anything was to

have an intent (sankalpa), and a total un-attachment

to the consequences of the outcome. By deferring to

the Universal Intelligence/ Shiva/shakti/ God, I

remind myself of my place again and again - only a note

in the great orchestra; a drop in the

ocean.<br><br>Desire is unavoidable for the ego centered ‘man.’ We

need the basic desire to live to remain alive. The

level of consciousness determines the nature of desire.

Some one may desire a million dollars, children or a

lover, while others may desire the Truth. Desire, to me,

is the fuel that moves us forward. It is desire that

led to the incarnation in the first place. I

personally crave or ask for mukti, from my ego, the ignorant

'i' which doesn't seem to have the confidence to

trust and let go of control of the creation process.

Then ‘i’ use my mind with its understanding and

insight to bring myself back and restabilize myself in

the 'I' which silently awaits. ( ‘i’ = ego; and ‘I” =

the transcendent )<br><br>Therefore, i use my mind

and the insights it gains as a tool to keep me

grounded in the Truth as i experience it at the moment. It

is the ego which leads to our incarnation. It is

ego-centered tools like feelings, thoughts (mind) that I use

to transcend itself. Koan isn’t it? One of my guru

says “ Ego makes a great slave, but a lousy master.”

<br><br>This going back and forth is an important part of my

sadhna. Like dyeing a cloth. Dipping in color again and

again. One day the dip will make my color permanent. I

therefore bring myself back to “Thy will be done” again and

again, every time I stray and seek control. <br><br>I

live what I understand, I try not to say that which I

can’t live and through a systematic constant vigilant

retuning I return to the center which knows, has always

known and has no need to ask. <br><br>I'm sure the

journey is imperfect, but it has worked so far and will

continue to work till I will need no reminder that "Thy

will" is always done.<br><br>Tat Twam Asi<br>UMA

[Guest guest]

Excellent, what you said is exactly practical

spirituality. To know what to achieve and where I fail is the

essence of quest.<br>Ultimately its THY WILL, not mine as

per Jnana Yoga. I dont exist as such because manas

and buddhi is but matter. Its all a dream not like

the dream we have at night. Its difficult to explain

because Time and space does not exist there. Just feel it

without that feeling.<br>Though THY WILL remains the same

for other yogas yet the way of reconciling may be

different. All roads lead to the same path. But individuals

differ due to previous Samaskaras.