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Dear Sadhant Singh,

 

I want to thank you for taking your time to write me such an informative and

unlifting

email. I think joining this group is one of the best things that I have

done. I am going to

do the exercises you suggested and also meditate much more than I have been.

For me

it has been all about fear of losing control (from an ego perspective) and

wanting to surrender

to the truth but nevertheless being paralized by intense terror. (of the

kundalini and knowing

probably unconciously that if I cooperate things can never be the same) The

strangest and

most disturbing part of all of what I have been going through is the fact

that everything I decide

to do on a positive level there is another part of me pulling the exact

opposite direction. Many

times I just do nothing because of the anxiety I feel either way. What has

caused me grief

among other things this whole time is the fact that I was pulling away from

God and I didn't want to but did nevertheless. Confusion, frustration, and a

sense of helplessness overcame

me for awhile but deep inside I knew (or know) that I will overcome because

ultimately I love

and have faith in God. (no matter how my behavior contradicts this) and my

only solace is

that God knows who I really am and if I seem to be rebellious or care less

God knows more than me even-- that this is not my hearts desire--. I need to

get a hold in a peaceful and gentle

manner of my unconcious processes and you have helped me see that I am not

unable to

do this with more effort and courage. I think the water retention is from

the second chakra

and possibly and imbalance? I don't and have not for many years eaten salt

added to my food

or eaten high sodium processed foods. Sometimes I feel I have nutrition

deficiencies and that

my body is not the same as it used to be before the kundalini experience. I

am 28 years old

and I read somewhere that your body changes completely in 7 year cycles. I

don't know but

if I just meditate and do more yoga I will probably tune my self in to the

answers. Thank you again, and I really do appreciate your help.

michelle

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Dear Michelle,

 

>What has caused me grief

> among other things this whole time is the fact that I was pulling away

from

> God and I didn't want to but did nevertheless.

 

There is one thing you should know: God loves you, the way you are. How can

you be sure? Because He gave you the opportunity to be here, and to come

back to Him. His love only is what draws and keeps people on the spiritual

path, and the paths may be many but the destination is the same. God can't

NOT love you, because you and Him are one, and have always been one, and

will always be one. This is the big open secret of yoga and spirituality.

You may not believe this now, and that is fine. But just remember it as a

possibility. My teacher said that since this - the experience of total

union - is what you will experience in the end, why not know it from the

beginning?

 

About the terror of change... Yes, life will never be the same once you set

out on the spiritual path. But don't even think it is YOU who are

terrorized! It is your ego, and your bad tendencies who are so afraid. What

will happen to them if your behaviour becomes perfect : )? You are not your

ego, and you are not your feelings, and you are not your mind. You are a

flame of divine love. Maybe you can't see this, but others can. There is

something so strong inside you that longs for the spiritual - it longs for

home. This is who you are. If the ego makes noise, let it. This is what it

is supposed to do.

 

It is said that you need to have a lot of good karma and the touch of divine

grace to start on the spiritual path. Most people are still content to live

in the world and do not look for anything further. It is the few blessed

ones who hear the call to come home, to the place of perfection, the place

of love, the place of eternal bliss. No matter how hard things may seem,

remember that you have been blessed to be here. Remember that you have God's

love, and He is calling you back. As Rumi said -

 

"Lo, I am with you always" means when you look for God,

God is in the look of your eyes,

in the thought of looking, nearer to you than your self,

or things that have happened to you

There's no need to go outside."

 

Many blessings,

Satsang Kaur

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Dear Satsang Kaur,

 

I want to sincerely thank you for that beautiful and encouraging letter.

Sometimes hearing the truth through the words of another and

especially words of compassion and wisdom, can make all the difference.

I have felt alone in many ways and knowing that there are other people

who don't find it so unusual that I have vowed to make my relationship

and committment to God my number one focus in life is quite a breakthrough.

Your email has given me new hope and energy and has reminded me of

what love really means...I have a little plaque next to my bed that says,

"Love is patient" and since God is Love I guess I am alright after all!

truly grateful,

michelle

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Dear Michele and everyone else,

 

Attune to cycles and do what is appropriate during those cycles. They are

for example the seasons, night and day, the moon and other astrological

influences. During the feminine energies it is most appropriate to meditate

and relax. During the masculine energies we feel like taking action and

being more active.

 

My next KYTraining lesson is on surrender. It will cover some of your

questions on how to accomplish that. It will be out in about 2 weeks.

 

Sat Nam,

 

Gururattan Kaur

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Dear Michelle,

 

Reading your messages made me think a lot. I am 26 now (27 by the end

of this month) and suffer from anxiety and depression. I wanted to

share with you that the path is not easy but it is not imposible. I

still have my downs after two years of intense battle-but I think

everyone have those-.

 

Kundalini Yoga gave me (gives me) faith and hope when I thought there

wasn't any other possibility for me; it connects me with my inner

power and with God. It has helped me manage my days without

antidepressants, and it has made me discover my real self and power

to accomplish things I never dare doing before. As you mentioned, it

is scary to think we won't be the same, I felt that way too, but

think about all the positive things that will come to your life with

the change. I see it now as an evolution.

 

The most amazing part of it all is that no matter what we decide, or

how many times we stumble, God is always present within us.

 

Sat Nam,

Karem

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Dear Michelle/Karem :

 

I have suffered from anxiety since I was young, I'm

48 now, married with 3 young sons, I started

searching

and doing spiritual practices 10 years ago because

always felt that had things unresolved in my inside.

 

I have 6 months since I found KY and joined to this

list, and believe me, I'm becoming friend of my

anxiety, I don't feel it like an enemy (as I used to),

 

I don´t mean that I like it, but I accept it as a

response of unresolved issues.

 

This group has been for so far, an incredible support

for me, I've received more than I ever expected, I

feel that in the last 10 years I was sailing on

small rivers, and now I've arrived to the Sea.

 

Much Light & Peace

 

Carlos

 

 

 

Reading your messages made me think a lot. I am 26

now (27 by the end

of this month) and suffer from anxiety and

depression. I wanted to

share with you that the path is not easy but it is

not imposible. I

still have my downs after two years of intense

battle-but I think

everyone have those-.

 

Kundalini Yoga gave me (gives me) faith and hope

when I thought there

wasn't any other possibility for me; it connects me

with my inner

power and with God. It has helped me manage my days

without

antidepressants, and it has made me discover my real

self and power

to accomplish things I never dare doing before. As

you mentioned, it

is scary to think we won't be the same, I felt that

way too, but

think about all the positive things that will come

to your life with

the change. I see it now as an evolution.

 

The most amazing part of it all is that no matter

what we decide, or

how many times we stumble, God is always present

within us.

 

Sat Nam,

 

>

>

 

 

 

 

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