yoga experience

[Guest guest]

Dear Michelle

Thank you for your response, my very problem is being scared! You are very

insightful.

I cannot be scared any more of being hurt. I have heard many stray

voices in the past and I refused to listen to any of them. I have seen things

and I turned away from them. I have stayed completely scared. I judged that

they were all bad. I was raised to believe that you should never talk to the

dead or anything that wasn't flesh and blood. Nothing in the 'spirit realm'

was good. Period!!

Finally now, I must trust my heart to tell me how to feel rather than my

fear. Rather than my mind or bible belt upbringing.

 

I am learning a lot about how to not judge others or myself. It is much

deeper than I had ever thought before. This new issue with Cecil is part of

my learning this important lesson. I must trust my heart .... I asked my

heart for a teacher and Cecil answered me. She answered me from my heart like

a part of me. She was a spark coming from my fire. I cannot judge when I am

answered with for what I asked. I must trust God and loose the fear I have

created.

This week I did something I viewed as terrible. I judged myself. When I

felt Like I deserved everyone's dislike and for them to not even know me, I

unknowingly judged them. I judged how they were going to feel. It is not

for me to say or know what others will feel because I judge myself. I must

trust that all that is right will prevail. When I have done something wrong

it is just wrong -I will learn to not do it again. I must learn from my

mistakes. Bigger still! I must trust my mistakes because they teach me!

If I try and separate anything into good or bad I will close myself

off to God. God is all around me in everyone and everything. I cannot close

myself off because I am scared that I will be hurt. If I worry about being

hurt then I am really saying that other people are bad. That is judging

others.

I cannot judge the voice I hear. I have to trust that I will know and

will hear what is God. I have to be totally open. Only in being totally open

can I release my fear. Only in releasing my fear can I totally know Gods

love.

Expecting or worrying that I may be wronged is inviting the "wrong' in

to my life. When I say Ong Na Mo Guru Dev Na Mo I am always protected. Right?

I cannot be afraid anymore. I do not think that Cecil is spirit lost

around me. I think she is one of my guides and has always been with me. I

will promise to stay grounded and to listen to my heart. Thank you for

talking to me about this. I do not want to be confused. I do not want to be

clouded. I trust I will always know the difference. I will trust and know

God. Thank you for your wonderful knowledge and thoughts. You can write me

anytime too if you want to. I feel more 'crazy' that I ever have, yet it is a

crazy good thing.

 

*When you say 'veil' are you talking about the colorful but blackish

oily/watery wall type separation curtain that I come up to when I meditate?

The first time I noticed the curtain was there I was shocked!! How could I

never have seen it before??????I peeked my head inside and I saw 3 very happy

people standing just inside of it. They were clapping and smiling and were so

very happy to see me. I told my brother about it and he told me not to ever

go through there again.He sais that I may not ever get back. Is this true? I

haven't looked inside since.

Sat NAm

Guru Tera Kaur