need help

[Guest guest]

Greetings to all,

I have been reading all the posts although I haven’t

been posting to the list much. I am amazed to see the

zest with which everyone on the list carry out their

sadhana and congratulate everyone for that.

I am writing again to ask for help with my sadhana. I

had been practicing KY pretty regularly till some time

back, the result of which was quite perceptible in

myself. Then suddenly I just lost the motivation. I

just dint feel like getting up in the morning to do

the sets. So instead of fretting over my lassitude to

practice in the mornings I tried doing some inner

work. I have been trying to establish a loving

relationship with my soul. I try and share every

thought and every action with my soul, like a really

close friend with whom I consult before doing

anything. I must admit that it made me feel nice and

on many occasions helped me to find courage to do

things that I couldn’t have otherwise. I would start

my day with this practice and commit to myself to keep

it going through out the day, keep coming back to it

if I would ‘slip’ in to the irresistible train of

useless thoughts as usual. And everyday I ‘slip’ soon

after I make this commitment to myself. The problem is

that I simply am not motivated enough to take effort

to gather up myself all over again and again. I lose

myself. I ‘know’ it’s beneficial for me to get back

but I don’t. It feels like too much of an effort. I

feel it’s because, although I benefit from the

process, I am not thoroughly enjoying it. Where am I

going wrong? Or is it just my lassitude. Or is it

because this process is not working for me and my

‘unmotivation’ is pressing me to go deeper and find a

completely different approach to my sadhana. Although

it beats me what approach there can be other than

this. I know you would say that if you really want to

do it, you would do it. I really want to, but am just

not motivated enough. I know that sounds

contradictory, but I can’t explain it… because I don’t

understand it myself!! As much as I abhor living

‘unconsciously’, I am unable to be present to myself

all the time. I am a little tired of this unending

process of fighting the lassitude and inertia within

me, and motivating myself again and again. I am

eagerly looking forward to all of your opinions and

suggestions. Gk , is this the result of some planetary

cycles at work!?!( sorry, that sounds like an excuse

but I couldn’t help asking!!!)

 

Sat Nam

Preeti

 

 

 

 

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[Guest guest]

> As much as I abhor living

> `unconsciously', I am unable to be present to myself

> all the time. I am a little tired of this unending

> process of fighting the lassitude and inertia within

> me, and motivating myself again and again.

 

Well, my two cents would be: try to make more realistic goals for

yourself.

 

In other words, you admit that motivation, or a lack thereof, is your

hurdle. But it appears that the goal you are striving for, "being

present to myself all the time" may be too daunting for you to begin

with. I personally don't feel present to myself all the time. In

fact, I'm just beginning to approach that level. Still in the

distance for me, but I can now see it and occasionally experience it.

Perhaps try to commit to yourself that you are NOT going to be

present all the time right now. And with that, commit also that when

you are conscious of that fact, you will try to change it for as long

as you can. Don't beat yourself up if you can't achieve that state of

mind full-time. I think that goal is great, but is something that is

achieved with diligent practice and years of work (just my opinion).

Start small and build up.

 

And with sadhana, do the same thing. You don't feel motivated to do

it every day, early in the morning, for hours.....Just thinking about

it that way kinda makes me hesitate as well. Instead, when you wake

up a bit early in the morning, get out of bed and just meditate for a

few minutes. Or maybe, do one or two asanas. And try to just do a

couple of minutes whenever you wake up. Let the effects from what you

are able to do act as the motivation to go further and longer.

 

Not sure if that's useful or not.

 

Christa

[Guest guest]

At 08:10 PM 10/23/02 +0000, you wrote:

 

>And with sadhana, do the same thing. You don't feel motivated to do

>it every day, early in the morning, for hours.....Just thinking about

>it that way kinda makes me hesitate as well. Instead, when you wake

>up a bit early in the morning, get out of bed and just meditate for a

>few minutes. Or maybe, do one or two asanas. And try to just do a

>couple of minutes whenever you wake up. Let the effects from what you

>are able to do act as the motivation to go further and longer.

 

a good sadhana I heard from a friend was simply lighting a candle in the

morning, saying a one sentence prayer ("God is in me and I am in God" or

"This is all I need to do to wake up" or "Love Love Love" or whatever) and

then blow it out. Do the same thing right before you go to bed at night.

(And be amazed at even the resistance you give yourself for doing a 10

second sadhana every morning and night)

 

I think once a routine of daily practice is established, it is much easier

for it to expand, than for it to be "big and grand" all at once (and who

are we trying to impress with our blustering anyway?)

 

another good thing: sadhana starts with s for sometimes, and ends with a

for always

 

 

 

 

[Guest guest]

Sat Nam ya'll,

Boy can I relate. But I have to remember that I didn't get where I am all

at once and it'll take time to develope some new ways. After all, if I was as

perfect as I wish I was, I wouldn't still be here playing in the dirt would I?

 

Bless ya'll,

Leo

 

 

 

[Guest guest]

Hi Preeti,

 

I think, to be conscious is the basic purpose of all the meditations. An

enlightened person is fully conscious. You are trying to be conscious, and

it is OK. But because deeply we are unconscious, we soon forget ourselves

and are lost. But slowly slowly this practice will lead you to be more

conscious. It is a gradual process. You can practice consciousness any

moment.

When you eat, eat consciously, when you walk, walk consciously, when you

breathe, breathe consciously. This will help you to become more conscious.

And one day when consciousness reaches its maximum then even one dies

consciously. One becomes immortal. Birth and Death become simply two

happenings in life. That is what I think.

 

 

Blessings

 

 

 

Bhisham