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Sat Nam Christa,

 

As someone who has beeen through many bereavements I feel the best thing

you can do for your mother is let her grieve and just be there to support

her. That is all you can do for her, but it is very important that she

knows she has that support. It's completely normal to feel you want do

something for her, fix her pain, but you can't. Just accept that, be

there and listen. That way she can move along through her grief process.

 

 

When my first husband died someone told me it would take two years to

get over it and they were absolutely right. I actually felt something

leaving me two years later. Losing a spouse is excrutiating and the

closer the marriage the harder the loss. It can be very uncomfortable for

the people around, but it's not going to get fixed anytime soon. Your

mother has been in shock and now with the shock wearing off expect her to

feel the loss more keenly for a while. In time it will ease, but it is a

process that takes a lot of time. Love , patience and support is what

you can offer her now, and I know you will.

 

Love and blessings,

Avtar

 

______________

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I think I missed the thread. Did your mother have an accident of some kind? If

so, give her a dose, or several, of the homeopathic remedy, Arnica

10M, or Arnica CM. It will help to dislodge the memory from her body.

Accupuncture will also help with that. Is there some other cause for her

emotion? Let me know on the list or off.

 

Seva Simran

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Dear Christa,

after I lost my beloved Dad my Mother carried kleenex with her everywhere

because she cried all the time and the slightest thing would bring on tears. I

found that by relating something funny or cute I could steer her attention in a

cheerful direction. I'ld also call - often several times during the day- if I

heard, thought of or read anything at all that might interest her, just to get

her mind off herself. If some memory of Dad brought the tears I'ld relate

something funny he had done and we'ld both be laughing. When their anniversary

rolled around I noticed Mama growing tense I decided that since we know our

loved ones are with us at a moment's notice we'ld have a special dinner and

coffee and cake as if Dad was still with us. I brought flowers and a dozen

balloons (because I was afraid of how to end the day and have Mama distraught

again.) so after coffee I had Mama write a little note for Dad which we

attached and then we watched the balloons till they disappeared. I think Mama

has taken comfort in our little ritual every birthday, anniversary or holiday

and looks forward to them. I also noticed that talking freely of Daddy comforts

her ( and me too)

 

Love and Blessings to you both.

 

Ruth

-

emotional meltdown

 

I would love to get your advice. My mother has been doing pretty

good, relatively speaking. But the past week was just really bad for

her. I went over last night and she just cried off and on for over an

hour.

 

 

 

 

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