kriya/meditation

[Guest guest]

Sat Nam Tracy,

I'm not sure where I read Gururattana's suggestion to work with

a counselor or therapist (maybe along with the l2 steps) to process

inner conflicts and pain - but it was a suggestion that I had put

aside for many years. Growing up in an abusive environment, I had

learned that if I needed anything, I had better do it myself. In my

teens and twenties, I medicated myself with virtually anything I

could get my hands on. Through the grace of God, I was led to the

AA program when I was 26. It sounded wonderful - the prospect of

starting my life all over again, one day at a time - and leaving the

past behind.

I am certain that I have grown and developed in many areas of

my life - but there has always been some sort of undercurrent -

depression, anxiety, whatever that has interferred with my ability

to experience inner peace and joy on a consistent basis. After

twenty six years in AA, I humbled myself to seek counselling from a

professional that specialized in abuse. I have learned an enormous

amount during the past year. For one thing, victims of abuse have a

very difficult time being "in their bodies." It has always been so

much easier for me to reside in my head - with my thoughts.

My initial reaction to going back over my past once again

was, "What difference will it make? Nothing I can do about it now."

It obviously hasn't changed the past in any way shape or form, but I

am certain that I have grown considerably in compassion and

understanding regarding the scope and depth of my woundedness.

Gururattana wrote that after exploring "our stories", it is

incumbent to "let them go", but I'm not sure that I even knew what

those words meant a year ago.

There's an expression in AA that says, "the longest journey you

will ever take will be from your head to your heart." It has indeed

been a very long journey. I am grateful for the twelve steps,

kundalini yoga, fellow seekers, and (last but not least) the grace

of God.

I would be curious to hear what Gururattana would add to the

wonderful suggestions you have received with respect to handling an

unhealthy method of coping.

God bless you. I was so touched by your honesty and openness

in sharing your dilemma.

With love and light,

Abinashi

[Guest guest]

Sat Nam Abinashi,

thank you for your wonderful post about your courageous journey back

to yourself. And for sharing the insight about how those of us who

grew up with no adult to rely upon (and often adults that relied upon

us as children) learned not to ask for help. Surely one of the great

liberations of being an adult is having the ability to seek out and

ask for help in developing the tools and understanding we need to

progress on our journey back to ourselves and towards our ultimate

liberation from destructive habits and our true selves.

 

i believe it was the Dalai Lama - or perhaps a westerner who was

working with him - who noted that many westerners have issues of

self-esteem that often cannot be resolved with meditation alone. As

members of an individualistic society not a collective one, our

psyches are somewhat different. While an extremely experienced guru

(teacher) may be able to help us with these issues if they are also

knowledgable about psychology and willing to spend extra time with us,

it is perhaps more appropriate to supplement our practice of KY with

therapy at certain points. KY is a very powerful tool for releasing

repressed emotions, when combined with therapy it can greatly enhance

our understanding of ourselves and ability to let old emotions and

habits go for good. We cannot teach ourselves what we do not know, and

by accepting help, surrendering to the process, and healing ourselves

we contribute to healing the whole. For we are all one By taking

back our power to heal ourselves and by giving ourselves permission to

seek help when we need it, we change our story (our personal

mythology) from that of victim to hero. This does not mean that the

"facts" of the past change, it means that our understanding of our

past and the stories we tell ourselves are from a different

perspective...and with understanding we become the creators of our

lives and souls not the victims of fate controlled by others and our

own fears. We can begin to see how great suffering can result in great

compassion when we have the courage to take responsibility for

ourselves. We become active participants in our lives and our heroes

journey is towards the light of our soul. And surely compassion is the

greatest gift we can share with ourselves and the world? Bowing to

the hero in all of us

blessings and love

ovasoul

 

 

 

 

Kundaliniyoga, "dkellylyon" <dkellylyon@m...>

wrote:

>

> Sat Nam Tracy,

> I'm not sure where I read Gururattana's suggestion to work with

> a counselor or therapist (maybe along with the l2 steps) to process

> inner conflicts and pain - but it was a suggestion that I had put

> aside for many years. Growing up in an abusive environment, I had

> learned that if I needed anything, I had better do it myself. In my

> teens and twenties, I medicated myself with virtually anything I

> could get my hands on. Through the grace of God, I was led to the

> AA program when I was 26. It sounded wonderful - the prospect of

> starting my life all over again, one day at a time - and leaving the

> past behind.

> I am certain that I have grown and developed in many areas of

> my life - but there has always been some sort of undercurrent -

> depression, anxiety, whatever that has interferred with my ability

> to experience inner peace and joy on a consistent basis. After

> twenty six years in AA, I humbled myself to seek counselling from a

> professional that specialized in abuse. I have learned an enormous

> amount during the past year. For one thing, victims of abuse have a

> very difficult time being "in their bodies." It has always been so

> much easier for me to reside in my head - with my thoughts.

> My initial reaction to going back over my past once again

> was, "What difference will it make? Nothing I can do about it now."

> It obviously hasn't changed the past in any way shape or form, but I

> am certain that I have grown considerably in compassion and

> understanding regarding the scope and depth of my woundedness.

> Gururattana wrote that after exploring "our stories", it is

> incumbent to "let them go", but I'm not sure that I even knew what

> those words meant a year ago.

> There's an expression in AA that says, "the longest journey you

> will ever take will be from your head to your heart." It has indeed

> been a very long journey. I am grateful for the twelve steps,

> kundalini yoga, fellow seekers, and (last but not least) the grace

> of God.

> I would be curious to hear what Gururattana would add to the

> wonderful suggestions you have received with respect to handling an

> unhealthy method of coping.

> God bless you. I was so touched by your honesty and openness

> in sharing your dilemma.

> With love and light,

> Abinashi

>