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Om Amrtesvaryai Namah!

 

Namaste dear siblings....my darling Amma sisters and brothers......

 

Jaya Amma!!!

 

to continue the ongoing adventures of kasi visvanath (also

posted on the other Amma list!)...as he looks longingly for His

Beloved Mother....everywhere in the deep dark forest....surrounded by

demons, and flying squirrels.....looking for that elusive Swan.

 

the continuing adventures in daily living have been

"interesting"...and ongoingly so...it's hard to explain...while work

is intense...feeling like one is policed in a way, all the

time...(very difficult for a democratically minded type...)and money

is even more intense...by its absence..."Just how little CAN you live

on darling Son?"...at the same time, Amma, my darling Amma, is making

Herself more noticeable...and drawing me ever deeper into that most

wonderful of relationships, a child to his Mother...a shishya to his

Gurudevi...

 

there is not a sweeter relationship on this earth or anywhere

else...all other relationships end at the very least at the grave,

many much sooner, but the relationship between the children and the

Divine...that remains....if one is filled with prema bhakti, what need

have we of any thing else....the Lord Himself will take care of such a

one, even bringing what is needed unasked!!!

 

So said Krsna in His Bhagavad Gita, and so also said Christ in His

lessons about the Lilies of the field....

 

i used to think that was all just myth, or self-delusion....but after

meeting Amma, and reading of Her life, and seeing the occurrences of

MY own life...i am led to the inescapeable conclusion that it is true!

even literally true!

 

If we are asking our Divine Mother for Bread, will She give us a

stone?

and if we are asking for Divine Love alone, and wanting to surrender

utterly unto Her will, then will She not take full care of one?...in

my experience, the more trust i place in my Amma the more She rewards

it...the more surrender i enter into, the more beautiful is the

day....the clouds, the trees, the birds, the people....but if i am

egoistic...worrying about this or that...work or

.....health...or...i'll just give myself a headache, and the whole

world looks terrible....on the other hand, when i notice this mind

wandering in those unproductive places....then is the time for

intervention....o monkey mind, how would you like THIS toy for a

while...a mantra, or a bhajan, or a chant...or just a redirection of

the flow of consciousness from the outside, the objects of desire, and

possession, to within, where She dwells in bliss in our deepest

hearts....

 

i am reminded of the So'Ham mantra (or Ham sa), where you breathe in

either So or Ham (depending upon your teaching...in mine it was in on

Ham and out on Sa,

only pronounced more like Hong Sau) (Bengali pronunciation)(it means

"i am She!" or "i am He!" depending upon your preference.)...it is

said this mantra refers to She Who dwells within our hearts, Whom We

can feel sometimes fluttering in there...like a swan's wings...thus

Hamsa is a name of the Goddess Kali, when She is seated or dancing in

our Hearts....

Hamsa means "swan" or goose....usually swan, as swans were believed to

have the ability to separate out and drink the milk from a milk and

water combination...thus a symbol of discrimination...of

Viveka...discriminating the real from the unreal....and most of what

we take as "real" is actually unreal according the the

Vedic teachings....

According to the Rishis, only that which remains is considered to be

real, and all else, which is transient, temporary, is "unreal"....thus

a Hamsa would be able to discriminate the real from the unreal...in

this way and relieve him/her self of any worries about the unreal

things...which must come and go as they do.

 

then we get to the Paramahamsa...the Supreme Swan...a title bestowed

lovingly by Indian devotees upon their beloved very Great Ones....

such as Sri Ramakrsna Paramahamsadeva and Paramahamsa

Yoganandaji....who wrote the Autobiography of a Yogi....and then we

get to Amma, who is beyond all of these categories....leaving us

speechless with awe.

 

as i understand it, many people have used this sadhana of Hamsa mantra

to reach the other shore...i find it very calming (and also the Ma Om

mantra works like that)...it fills me with the immanent feeling of the

Divine Presence just behind my closed eyes, just behind my breath....a

delicate, shining, Loving presence....Who is slowly but surely

stealing my mind away!!!!!O Thank You Beloved Divine Presence....you

can have it all!!! Here you are....

 

when i spend time in this space, the work worries become absolutely

irrelevant....not important...just more trash to throw out....WHAT DO

I REALLY NEED?????

 

What do we take with us when we go???only the Love we've shared with

our fellow travellers in this hotel....every kind action, every smile,

every bit of love is stored up in our favour...

 

As Amma always says, if we do a hundred things right and then one

thing wrong our neighbours will condemn us...but if we do a hundred

things wrong, and one thing right, God will notice this and love us

for it...it's all a question of to Whom do we refer? selfish ego, or

the Divine Presence within each and every one

of us.....and do we really have a choice?

 

i noticed when Venus travelled into Pisces a while ago (and is still

there going retrograde now i think...and for another few months in

Pisces!!),

the connection with Amma just seemed to open up even wider...i find

myself talking to Her a lot more (i already WAS thinking of Her and

talking to Her a lot before too!!)...music from Her songs will be

lilting thru my head day and night (and i'm NOT listening to any tapes

at the moment....don't need it!)...i'll find myself singing Narayana

Hari, Narayana, Sri Vasudeva Murare....Narayana is a name for SriVisnu

or Sri Krsna...

 

So Venus is in Jupiter's home, and Jupiter is in Venus's home.....this

is VERY good for connecting with the Divine Beloved especially if your

Divine Beloved is your Guru....(and in my case Ishta Devata is Venus,

so that more or less puts paid to that account...)excellent, never

better.

of course one could also say that it could be a good time to connect

with a human beloved also, but that would be up to you....as you know

Venus has many levels....and one could activate the lower ones as well

as the upper ones...the Bhakti and devotion... i'm still a bit in

Jupiter Rahu Rahu until May...when it'll be Jupiter Rahu

Jupiter...then Saturn in August....So Guru (jupiter) is being

activated in the transit thru

Taurus directly opposite my Sun in Scorpio and a transitting Mars,

almost on top of my sun...and Rahu/Ketu is bringing those karmic

connections more out in the open...so that i feel so much more a part

of the "family"....Amma's family...(Ketu is transitting in my 12th

house in Sagittarius....soon coming up on the nakshatra called Mula

(about 5 degrees away) ...which is pointing at the Galactic center,

about which our entire Galaxy is turning and in which Mercury (Amma's

Atmakaraka) sits in my birth chart.(12th house is the Guru's home or

ashram))

 

so my impression is thus: as Mercury in my Chart is sitting smack in

the middle of Mula...and Mercury is Amma's Atmakaraka....thus my

intuition tells me that She came from the Galactic Center, thru Mula,

with all of Her little children, to play a wonderful game upon this

little earth down here......and to remind the people that there really

are such beings as mahatmas, and that Divine love really does

exist....and thus to combat the darkness of the materialistic Marxist

and capitalist forces......to scatter Her sacred flowers, Her beloved

children, Her Names, all over the Earth, like a spider's

web...interconnecting everywhere, with the Divine Names....

 

As we know Amma has given many many of Her children Names...and one of

the forms of Divine worship involves singing the Thousand Names of the

Deity...(or 108 Names)...and with each Name you are to offer a white

flower, representing your heart's love and surrender, and all the

difficulties, and good things that you'd like to offer to the

divine....a beautiful white flower with each Lovely Divine Name...and

ARE they ever beautiful, those names of the Devas and Devis.......i

love to sing the chants, and listen to the swamis sing them

too....Amma says it does us a lot of good to do this...to actually

take part in the worship...in fact once She has gone thru such a puja

with us, She says that we ourselves can perform the worship....and

that it will help us grow, and to concentrate our minds more upon the

Divine...the idea being to establish an everyday, all the time

relationship with the Beloved Deity...such that we always feel the

loving presence and sweet Bliss of that Deity....

as Sri Ramakrsna used to say: "i just want to taste the sugar, i don't

want to BECOME the sugar!"

 

....so with Venus the Graha of Divine Love in Jupiter's home (where my

natal Jupiter was!) and Jupiter in Venus' home...wow!!!what an

opportunity for connecting in Divine Love...to taste the sugar!!!

 

In the Divine Mother's Love,

and in Her Service,

this littlest child

of Hers

bows

awkwardly,

humbly,

again and again

saluting You,

Her Darling Daughters

and Her Darling Sons!!

For So

You verily Are!!

 

as ever

Your Own Self,

 

visvanathan

 

Om Amrtesvaryai Namah!!