Guest guest Posted February 23, 2002 Report Share Posted February 23, 2002 Namah Shivaya, Len, Here is the story about my mantra change. I didn't actually ask for a mantra change, but I'll tell you what happened. I received a mantra from Amma the first time I met her in NYC around 1989. I asked for one, and was given a slip of paper with a mantra on it. Now I don't know if this is what Amma was giving out to everyone, but it happened to be my "ishtadevata". However, (rather stupid of me) I couldn't quite feel for many years that I had a "proper" mantra diksha, where my guru gives the mantra to me in my ear. I was also a little confused with questions about my family guru that I had considered THE guru for me up to then (though I had never recv'd a mantra from Her as I was too young when She went into Mahasamadhi). It took me many years of growing up, meeting Amma and thinking about my questions to see who Amma was to me, and that there was no conflict between Gurus or questions of divided loyalties after all. During those years, I would sporadically try the mantra, and stumble a bit at a certain part of it...but this I attribute to my not making a serious practice of it. Thus I had arrived at a very different place in my relationship to Amma two years ago in July 2000, when a series of happenings culminated in my being granted my silly wish. As gurus always do! We had had a scare about my husband's health in May 2000, and in praying for the diagnosis to be benign, I had vowed to do a series of "Lalitha Sahasranama" pujas accompanied by fasts for nine Fridays. Don't ask me why I picked the number or the day, except that it seemed to be appropriate! Well, completely coincidentally, the last Friday of this series took place the week before Amma came to New York that July. The very next Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday, there was Amma in town. So I was there to see her on Wednesday evening during Devi Bhava, and the thought occurred that since I had just finally learned the whole "Lalitha Sahasranama" and completed this series of Fridays, I should do the stotram to Amma as she sat there in the mood of Devi herself. I could get no place to sit that evening, every time I sat down someone would move me along, and finally I stood in the wings of the stage on which Amma sat, and did the whole stotram to Her from there. When it was done, I took my place in darshan line (my token number added up to nine, I remember...sorry for the trivia, but this is the sort of thing one does at 2 am!) And when it came my turn to go up to Her, She told me to sit there and meditate for a while nearby. So there I was (sitting down at last!); right near the mantra line. While I observed this short line move up and receive mantras from Amma, I thought "What a pity I never got a mantra in my ear from Amma...silly of me to care, but it would been so special.." By now, I had no doubt that Amma was the Sadguru for me. As the thought occurred, I decided on the spur of the moment to inquire from the gentleman facilitating the mantra line and giving the slips of paper to the newly initiated, if Amma might do me the favor of repeating my mantra in my ear. He said "you can ask her" (since I am Keralite too, and speak Malayalam); and so there I was in mantra diksha line. When Amma heard my request, She asked me what mantra did I have already? I repeated it, and She considered it carefully and said, in effect, "replace those two words with this (new) one" and repeated the modified version into my ear (still the same "ishtadevata"). And so, She fulfilled my wish. As always! This time, I was so much more aware of the joy and significance of the moment than I had been 10 years ago! Perhaps I had been purified and prepped through the fasts and pujas too, for this moment. Anyhow, I felt that I had earned it a bit more than the last time...and when I say I earned it...I really mean that Amma led me through that growth...and prepped me a little better than I'd been before. So it is ALL due to Her Infinite Grace, as you all well know. I find that I use this mantra much more easily, and only when I read Lutz's posting did it occur to me in retrospect that Amma may have changed the sticking points on that mantra to make it easier for me, even though I didn't quite realize that at the time. Now you can answer your own question...do you think it was Her decision or my request? I think the moves are always Hers! Om Amriteswaryai Namah... Usha > Message: 4 > Fri, 22 Feb 2002 13:05:28 EST > Len Black Lotus Rosenberg <kalipadma > Re: Re: Lutz's explanation of Mantra Diksha > > Namaste, Dear Usha -- > > Fascinating. Under what circumstances did Amma change your mantra? Was > this her decision, or did you request it?....... > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 23, 2002 Report Share Posted February 23, 2002 Dear Usha, that is a nice story and a little balm to my subdued anger about Amma's Mantra diksha. I am a person who takes such things very serious (typical German trait) and when I notice oriental carelessness I get upset. But seems Amma is letting such things happen only if people have lousy motifs about their practice. This is at least my private theory. The eager boys and girls get also proper diksha! Greetings Lutz Ammachi, DJUM@a... wrote: > Namah Shivaya, Len, > > Here is the story about my mantra change. I didn't actually ask for a mantra > change, but I'll tell you what happened. > > I received a mantra from Amma the first time I met her in NYC around 1989. I > asked for one, and was given a slip of paper with a mantra on it. Now I > don't know if this is what Amma was giving out to everyone, but it happened > to be my "ishtadevata". > > However, (rather stupid of me) I couldn't quite feel for many years that I > had a "proper" mantra diksha, where my guru gives the mantra to me in my ear. > I was also a little confused with questions about my family guru that I had > considered THE guru for me up to then (though I had never recv'd a mantra > from Her as I was too young when She went into Mahasamadhi). It took me many > years of growing up, meeting Amma and thinking about my questions to see who > Amma was to me, and that there was no conflict between Gurus or questions of > divided loyalties after all. During those years, I would sporadically try > the mantra, and stumble a bit at a certain part of it...but this I attribute > to my not making a serious practice of it. > > Thus I had arrived at a very different place in my relationship to Amma two > years ago in July 2000, when a series of happenings culminated in my being > granted my silly wish. As gurus always do! > > We had had a scare about my husband's health in May 2000, and in praying for > the diagnosis to be benign, I had vowed to do a series of "Lalitha > Sahasranama" pujas accompanied by fasts for nine Fridays. Don't ask me why I > picked the number or the day, except that it seemed to be appropriate! Well, > completely coincidentally, the last Friday of this series took place the week > before Amma came to New York that July. The very next Monday, Tuesday and > Wednesday, there was Amma in town. So I was there to see her on Wednesday > evening during Devi Bhava, and the thought occurred that since I had just > finally learned the whole "Lalitha Sahasranama" and completed this series of > Fridays, I should do the stotram to Amma as she sat there in the mood of Devi > herself. > > I could get no place to sit that evening, every time I sat down someone would > move me along, and finally I stood in the wings of the stage on which Amma > sat, and did the whole stotram to Her from there. When it was done, I took > my place in darshan line (my token number added up to nine, I > remember...sorry for the trivia, but this is the sort of thing one does at 2 > am!) And when it came my turn to go up to Her, She told me to sit there and > meditate for a while nearby. So there I was (sitting down at last!); right > near the mantra line. While I observed this short line move up and receive > mantras from Amma, I thought "What a pity I never got a mantra in my ear from > Amma...silly of me to care, but it would been so special.." By now, I had no > doubt that Amma was the Sadguru for me. As the thought occurred, I decided > on the spur of the moment to inquire from the gentleman facilitating the > mantra line and giving the slips of paper to the newly initiated, if Amma > might do me the favor of repeating my mantra in my ear. He said "you can ask > her" (since I am Keralite too, and speak Malayalam); and so there I was in > mantra diksha line. When Amma heard my request, She asked me what mantra did > I have already? I repeated it, and She considered it carefully and said, in > effect, "replace those two words with this (new) one" and repeated the > modified version into my ear (still the same "ishtadevata"). And so, She > fulfilled my wish. As always! > > This time, I was so much more aware of the joy and significance of the moment > than I had been 10 years ago! Perhaps I had been purified and prepped > through the fasts and pujas too, for this moment. Anyhow, I felt that I had > earned it a bit more than the last time...and when I say I earned it...I > really mean that Amma led me through that growth...and prepped me a little > better than I'd been before. So it is ALL due to Her Infinite Grace, as you > all well know. > > I find that I use this mantra much more easily, and only when I read Lutz's > posting did it occur to me in retrospect that Amma may have changed the > sticking points on that mantra to make it easier for me, even though I didn't > quite realize that at the time. > > Now you can answer your own question...do you think it was Her decision or my > request? I think the moves are always Hers! > Om Amriteswaryai Namah... > Usha > > > > > Message: 4 > > Fri, 22 Feb 2002 13:05:28 EST > > Len Black Lotus Rosenberg <kalipadma@j...> > > Re: Re: Lutz's explanation of Mantra Diksha > > > > Namaste, Dear Usha -- > > > > Fascinating. Under what circumstances did Amma change your mantra? Was > > this her decision, or did you request it?....... > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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