India Diary

[Guest guest]

Sat. Dec. 29

 

Another Bhava day. Amma's been hugging for an

hour and a half and the temple is still full to

the doors. She'll probably go 'til 3 or 4 p.m.,

then start Devi Bhava at 5 or so. What a Mama!

Have to go do seva now.

 

Well, X left this morning to attend to family

matters in the U.S. I tried to see her off and

failed. I went at 7 and she wasn't there yet.

The Indian man who seemed to know all about it

said that the taxi was coming at 7:30 and to wait,

but in my western mind I figured I could go and

come back. When I returned at 7:15 they informed

me that she had already gone. And M with her

no doubt. I felt so unaccountably sad that I

cried and walked down to the boat dock for a

while. X has been such a booster here. I shall

miss her very much. M, too, even though she was

very ill the entire month here, was a great help

and I shall miss her also.

 

I took my letters to X's room last night hoping

to see her. I left the letters, but on the rather

labyrinthine way up there--in the half light--

I saw a slight person with glasses carrying a

suitcase. Thinking it might be X, I ran after the

person, then realized it looked like a very

dark-skinned person. I think it was C, the

so-called "crazy" one. I haven't seen her today

so I wonder if she was leaving last night.

X had told me earlier that C's erratic behavior

had nearly caused riots here and that she (X)

felt that C's time was nearly over--that she

would be asked to leave soon. Y was so funny--

called C "the one who's always cleaning the clock,"

because of the way she always held her hands up

in the air during bhajans.

 

Later

 

I'm in the room with V and N because there is no

space for us (or so it seems) at DB. Earlier we

were over at the "Cafe," which serves the most

home-like western meals (I don't go there often)

and Scott came. He offered to show us his little

hole where he sleeps under the temple. It is

about six or six and a half feet high, seven feet

long, and five feet wide. He's so happy to have

a place to himself even if it is a luggage storage

place in addition to his "room." Many people sleep

in little "holes" like this under the temple here.

V is appalled. I find it fascinating that people

get by with so little--so few personal possessions.

One has to be either crazy to live here or very,

very serious about the spiritual path. It's not

just the space--it's the heat, the flies, the

dirt, the mobs of Indians, many of whom hack and

cough and spit a lot--something very culturally

different for westerners. It's a far cry from

Bellevue--or Redmond in Scott's case.

 

Scott, V, and I were outside when Mother came at

5:15 to start the Bhava. There was a young woman

(American, I believe) in a wheelchair who seemed

to be asking to be allowed to live here. She said

she had no health insurance, no one to take care

of her. Amma apparently asked about family. She

said all she had was a half-sister and father. If

she got an answer, I didn't catch it, and the

oh-so-hard-working Divine Mother went on to start

a 12 hour marathon of singing, hugging, etc. Hers

is certainly the least selfish life I've ever seen.

 

3:00 a.m.

 

Amma's dress is dark orange with gold trim and

interwoven patterns. It is beautiful. Her eyes

are still bothering Her, and She had the lights

dimmed where She sits. Thats the first time I've

seen that. I hope Her eyes get better. I do

worry for Her, although I assume it's all a big

leela.

 

 

 

 

 

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