India Diary Con't.

[Guest guest]

Jan. 7

 

Here in Calicutt still. Nine of us are sleeping out

on the back porch of the "house." I'm very grateful

to J for switching me from the school to the house.

I hear the school is pretty primitive. T is there

and says "that crazy C" is in her dorm there. "How

that woman gets around!" she says. It's all

Mother's leela.

 

I'm trying to "be like water" and getting gentle

practice with one of the ladies on the porch, who

essentially took down the modesty curtain across

from me by hanging all her wet laundry on it. Now

it droops to the point that people can see in.

I felt inwardly that she would not be receptive,

but decided to try to explain the problem to her.

She (as expected) claimed there was no problem, so

I just smiled and said okay.

 

Now sitting in the balcony, T and I are playing

tag-team with our good seats side by side. The

balcony is the assigned place for westerners.

We think Mother is to come about 11:30. The crowds

are already large and it's only 10:00 a.m. They

are getting ready to do the third archana of the day.

 

11:28 a.m.

 

Crowds as far as the eye can see. It is a major

operation to get from the temple to the house.

Manoharan (Scott) and I are supposed to take a

rickshaw into town to go confirm my ticket at the

Air India office. Plus he needs to go to a bank and

a film-developing place. This may be a long ordeal.

 

January 8

 

This must be Wednesday. I slept on my travel collar

wrong last night and got a headache. One of my

porch-mates from Reunion Island did some energy work

on me and now I'm feeling much better. I called

Kelley (my daughter) and asked her to call Northwest

Airlines International and confirm me on Flt. 8 for

January 15.

 

It's odd about being in India. The physical realities

are somewhat grueling by western standards, yet

inwardly there is such grace and joy! Of course for

me it's Mother's presence. I can honestly say there's

no where else I'd rather be--although at this point

I miss the kids and the word "home" has a certain

resonance.

 

Kelley said they were having a winter storm in

Austin with three inches of ice. I told her that

winter seems pretty far away here. She laughed.

She also said that Barbara got the permanent job!

Mother's blessings! I remember Prashant's words,

"She never forgets."

 

Our sleeping quarters are truly an international

conglomeration. There's H from Reunion Island, E,

an Indian Christian, a Japanese woman, P from

Ireland, the European with all the wash, L from

France, myself, and a Swedish woman, older, tall

and blond, with her eyes always full of God.

 

Since my reading with the psychic, I've been thinking

about his saying that he thought Mother was going to

bring me to India, and he was getting the number 4.

Last night while in the balcony watching Mother, I

was thinking about how much I love the kids and how

I had always planned on seeing Matthew grow up. I

suddenly thought, "Maybe in 10 years (in 2006) I'll

come to live with Mother!" Mother was in the middle

of a darshan (of course! She darshaned 10,000

yesterday, they said!) but she immediately pulled

her head free and looked up, shooting me a meaningful

look, holding it for a second, then returned to

darshaning the same man! It seemed like a

confirmation of my thoughts. It's very unusual for

her to do that here where darshans are so much

quicker than in the US. On one level that is not

good news, as I want to be with Her far sooner than

that. But at another level it feels right with no

strain. Going in 4 months or 4 years (the psychic's

thought) seemed to be rushing it a bit, even to me,

although I'll fly to her whenever she gives the

word, even if that word is tomorrow. The thought of

leaving her is one of two that moves me to tears here

in India. (I'm wiping tears as I write this.) The

other is the one brought up by the airplane incident,

leaving my children and grandchild through death.

 

Another Mother story: S is a devotee who works in

the library, so I've been with her nearly every day.

The last "sadhana day" on the roof Mother called

her up and began massaging S's head and temples as

though she had a headache. So later in the library

I asked S about it. She said she had just gotten a

migraine. She first saw the flashing lights,

signalling one was coming, and then it just hit

her in the right temple, the area Mother was massaging

the most. Naturally I asked if her headache went

away, and she said yes, she was glad to be able to

tell everyone who asked that it had! The blessings

of a satguru!

 

Scott (Manoharan) and I did indeed go confirm my

Air India ticket yesterday, but more on that later.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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[Guest guest]

Ammachi, Ellen Lamb <jyotsna2> wrote:

> Can't they do anything right in India? I asked

> Scott the other day why India, of all places,

> produces so many saints. He replied that he had

> given the matter a great deal of thought and decided

> the best analogy was to think of it in the same way

> that earth with a lot of manure grows great plants.

> I thought it was a good analogy.

 

Plants also do not grow in toxic waste, but as Swami Vivekananda put

it:

"If there is any land on this earth that can lay claim to be the

blessed Punyabhumi,to be the land to which souls on this earth must

come to account for karma,the land to which every soul that is

wending its way Godward must come to attain its last home,the land

where humanity has attained its greatest highest towards

gentleness,towards generosity,towards purity,towards calmness,above

all,the land of introspection and of spirituality-it is INDIA"

[Guest guest]

Dear sister Jyotsna,

 

thank you again for another diary entry.

I admire your courage in being so straightforward and honest in what

you write. I do not think that I could be so courageous in exposing

my inner thoughts and opening myself up for criticism.

We know you respect and love India, as it is the physcial locality

of Amma's birthplace, and Her main ashram; and also because you have

the desire to return there to live, in the future.

 

I have a good friend from India who lives here in Iceland. Her home

city is about 3 hours from Benares. My friend is constantly amazed at

how easily and quickly business and governmental transactions get

done in Iceland. One can understand this well if one has ever waited

in line for several hours in a major Indian city to buy a train

ticket or (in years past) to make a phone call, as I have myself. On

the other hand, my friend dearly misses the warmth and hospitality

found in the Indian culture.

Recently, Amma was asked to improve one bus transportation

facility by a government official, and Amma took on that task.

And, we have read Indian govt. officials saying that Amma is

accomplishing tasks with Her charitable activities that the govt

(with more financial resources), is not able to get done.

 

Amma is our ideal of efficincy, and also love, warmth and hospitality.

My hope in life is that from the manure that is the state of my body

and mind, Amma is in the process of making me one of Her beautiful

plants; to me this process seems to take a long time, but for Amma

who is also Kali, the Mother of time, maybe it is just one of Her

Divine seconds.

 

Thamk you again Jyotsna.

In Amma's Love,

Sara

 

 

 

Ammachi, Ellen Lamb <jyotsna2> wrote:

> Sometimes I wish I'd done like Faintglow and

> posted anonymously. Would it work if I told

> you my real name is Hester Schwartz and I live

> in Arizona?

>

> Thurs. Jan 9 (Still in Calicut)

>

> Well, I'm having a bad day. Tired of the red stuff

> they apparently spread all over this porch getting

> all over my white clothes, tired of the backwardness

> of India. Tore my new skirt on this silly step

> that never should have been built the way it's built.

> Can't they do anything right in India? I asked

> Scott the other day why India, of all places,

> produces so many saints. He replied that he had

> given the matter a great deal of thought and decided

> the best analogy was to think of it in the same way

> that earth with a lot of manure grows great plants.

> I thought it was a good analogy. Talked to Kelley

> again today. She said I was confirmed on Northwest,

> so that's a relief.

>

> Mother, please forgive my mistakes. I didn't mean

> to burst into the program last night at a quiet time,

> and I really didn't know quite what to do when I

> saw you looking at me. I wasn't sure I could

> gracefully kneel. I should have at least pronamed.

> Instead I fled up the stairs. What are you going

> to do with such a backward child? I would like to

> be perfect for you, and sometimes I don't even feel

> that I'm okay.

>

> I'm in the temple and one of the monks is giving a

> talk in Malayalam. I'll try to catch up on some

> items past. I promised to write more about getting

> my Air India ticket confirmed. The other day, Scott,

> another guy and I set off for downtown. The third

> got off at the bus station, I think. Scott wanted

> to develop some film and when we got to Eroth Centre

> at one Bank Road, there was a one-hour photo place

> right in the same complex as the Air India office.

> So he went to develop his photos and I went to Air

> India.

>

> The office was upstairs and there was this large,

> dimly lighted, dingy office with about 50 people

> sitting around and not one office worker anywhere.

> There was one sign that said "Enquiry" and "Prepaid

> Tickets" with an apparent customer sitting there also

> waiting. As usual, most were men. After a while

> sitting, I went over to the above-mentioned counter

> and spied a book with numbers and names. I asked the

> man sitting there if I should sign it, and it seemed

> that I should. So I put "140. E. Lamb." Then,

> totally freaked out by the surreal, hot, dim room

> where no one was moving, I went down to find Scott.

> He was very involved in ordering pictures and said

> he'd be ready in a few minutes. I told him it was

> "too scary" at the AI office.

>

> While I waited I sat down in the only available seat,

> which was between two young Indian men. The one on

> my right had what appeared to be a movie star

> magazine. The article he was reading was on the

> recent Michael Jackson concert. The article began,

> "First of all about the Michael Jackson concert, if

> you were not there you should kill yourself." I

> couldn't help thinking that if a magazine in the U.S.

> published such a line someone demented would kill

> themselves, and what an uproar there would be.

>

> After waiting 10 or 15 minutes, it was nearly two,

> and I then recalled seeing a sign saying lunch was

> from 1-2, so I went back upstairs with the idea that

> the office help might all have been at lunch. When

> I arrived there was one clerk conversing. To make a

> long story short, more desk help showed up, Scott

> showed up and started running around asking questions.

> He inquired about the list I had signed up on as

> #140 and learned they were currently on #67! He just

> about went ballistic, asking "How long?!" to

> indifferent shrugs. We were envisioning a ten hour

> wait to confirm a lousy plane ticket. Finally he

> (we) were told to go a newly-arrived, business-like

> looking man a in a crisp blue uniform shirt. Scott

> told him we only wanted to confirm a flight. He told

> us to go over to Mr. Singh, this huge, handsome,

> mustached and turbaned sikh. My God, what a man!

> Mr. Singh was temporarily busy, but told us to take a

> seat in excellent English. He even spoke English

> on the telephone! Then he speedily dispensed with

> my ticket confirmation, asking where I was staying.

> I showed him the address (both in English and

> Malayalam) that I have in my notebook. He commented

> that there seemed to be a LOT of people staying there.

> Scott said, "She's a GREAT guru!" and I added

> helpfully, "SAT-guru!" though my motive was more to

> get the handsome Mr. Singh to look at me than to

> add anything meaningful to the conversation. Mr.

> Singh smiled and handed my ticket back to me. I was

> almost sorry to leave him. I have to admit he's the

> most physically attractive man I've seen in India.

> His sheer masculinity was so powerful. Not that it

> matters!

>

> Back in the temple, the very dapper police official

> I spoke of earlier (three stars on his epaulets)

> with the brass-tipped stick, came to the rear of the

> stage, bowed low with his head pressed to the floor,

> then proceded to be lead singer in a bhajan. At

> present he's doing the chimes. When would one see

> that in the U.S.?

>

>

>

>

>

>

> Platinum - Watch CBS' NCAA March Madness, live on your

desktop!

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[Guest guest]

Ammachi, "Girish S.V." <girishv@e...> wrote:

> Ammachi, Ellen Lamb <jyotsna2> wrote:

> > Can't they do anything right in India? I asked

> > Scott the other day why India, of all places,

> > produces so many saints. He replied that he had

> > given the matter a great deal of thought and decided

> > the best analogy was to think of it in the same way

> > that earth with a lot of manure grows great plants.

> > I thought it was a good analogy.

>

> Plants also do not grow in toxic waste, but as Swami Vivekananda

put

> it:

> "If there is any land on this earth that can lay claim to be the

> blessed Punyabhumi,to be the land to which souls on this earth must

> come to account for karma,the land to which every soul that is

> wending its way Godward must come to attain its last home,the land

> where humanity has attained its greatest highest towards

> gentleness,towards generosity,towards purity,towards calmness,above

> all,the land of introspection and of spirituality-it is INDIA"

 

Girish (and Jyotsna),

 

Namah Shivaya.

 

I know this topic has been discussed, but I wish to offer another

viewpoint, perhaps humbling.

 

"Necessity is the mother of invention". We are all ware of this

saying. We can twist the language in this context to be "Necessity is

the mother of an avatar's birth".

 

So, looked at this this way, India mostly, and perhaps the world to a

lesser extent, seems to be in a DIRE NEED for many avatars to be born.

Perhaps, there is so much of injustice (adharma) happening in India

that the Lord is forced to take birth there again and again to

maintain a semblance of order, before departing.

 

Looked at it this way, the picture on India (or Indians) is not very

rosy. Remarkable Saints being born there with remarkable regularity

is, very honestly, an indication that Indians 'do not know how to

manage their social/ethical/personal lives and need a saint to put it

all in place for them'.... Not a very flattering view of my dear

country.

 

While neither viewpoint (what Girish espoused or I offered) is wholly

true, what I think is true is a combination of both, which will help

a true sadhak maintain a sense of equanimity.

 

So, lest we Indians get swept into a false pride of India being

a "DIVINE BHOOMI", I humbly suggest we look a little bit more into

what it actually means, and most impotantly, that we work towards

improving our lives daily - morally, spiritually, socially,

emotionally.

 

And please, please, please.... do not think I am slighting Swami

Vivekananda. He has been my hero since so many years. I do not doubt

his statement one bit, all I am saying is that this saying may have

been said in another context, and that (in my viewpoint), it is not

the ONLY applicable statement in this context.

 

Jai Ma!