Guest guest Posted September 19, 2003 Report Share Posted September 19, 2003 Namah Shivayah, dear ones, Think it's so interesting the way that Mother works in our lives. To speak for myself only, this latest "controversy" re: finances has really taken me to a differant level in my experience of Her. The fact that Ammachi is, in my eyes, a mahatma, a self-realized being, a Satguru, an avatar, even, and yet is doing this great work in a human body, that is every bit as fragile as our very own, and subsequently "bound" to experience such human limitations such as fatigue, hunger, ageing and death, ultimately, is remarkable to me. Amma says that this is Her dharma, that She could've left Her body at the moment that She merged with the sublime reality. Yet somehow that reality must be so infinately loving that to be merged in it causes some overwhelming source of compassion to well up inside us, spilling over the edges and driving us to live again in this form for the purpose of uplifting mankind. It is impossible to comprehend why God extends this bit of Him/Herself to us jivas every now and then. Maybe to remind us of our true nature, of the bliss and oneness that is our right as a part of that glorious whole. When I think about moksha, I inevitably think sadhana. I see Amma, and it's almost like the light of a lighthouse as I tumble about in this dark sea of maya. We're all going to merge in That someday! Someday each one of us will not be able to wipe the smile off our face because as we look into the faces of those around us we will see our beloved there, bagging our groceries, or crossing the street. Sadhana is hard. The more you give, the more you have to give, and the less you can stand to torture yourself. As an artist, my pain used to be my muse. As I let go of my pain, I feel less inspired to express, more inspired to act. This has been hard to reconcile. When I recieved my mantra this summer, the woman whom I spoke with told me that from here on, I'd better buckle my seatbelt, because it was going to be a wild ride, but to remember that Amma would be "driving" and would never leave me stranded on this path. So far, that's been pretty darn true. What a wild ride! How does Mother manage to reach across time and space to stir it up here and now? Maybe it's not for me to understand, just to experience. Curious to hear about how She stirs up other jiva soup.... anyone else hanging on for dear life? Have the feeling our Mother is no ordinary guru.... Many blessings, Brianna Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 20, 2003 Report Share Posted September 20, 2003 - Brianna Mosteller Amma Saturday, September 20, 2003 12:21 AM sadhana is a wild ride! Namaste brothers and sisters, Brianna, be assured you are not the only one hanging on for dear life- my life has been, like yours, an absolute roller coaster since I met Mother this summer! THe "unwelcome invitees" that Swami mentioned when he discussed my mantra have arrived by the carload, truckfull, and boat load! I lost all of my income for the entire summer IMMEDIATELY upon returning from Fairfield (literally found out the next day!), my husband was forced by our dr. to take medical retirement and SS has now denied his case, and my daughter, one of the dearest people in my life, has again been struggling with rheumatoid arthritis and the issue of possible lupus (systemic) has been raised once again. The TRULY odd thing is that I have not been particularly concerned about any of these events and I am, or was, by nature, a classic worrier. The edgy part of my nature seems to have diappeared..and since it's been months now, I am hoping it is a true, lasting change. My heart seems to know that the outcomes will be as they should be and that's that. ON the upside, since meeting Amma, I am also in a much better teaching environment; last year, I was at an at-risk, on probation school where I frequently came home with deep bruises, etc from breaking up fights and was simply crushed because I could not find a way to reach the kids there - and was not alone since that year, we had a teacher turn-over of 27 out 60!!!! Despite a lack of seniority that should have prevented me from transferring anywhere else for several years, I ended up being given a lovely position at a small rural school close to my home (the other drive was 40 minutes; this one is 12 - if Ron has a heart attack, as is expected by the drs., I have a chance of getting to him now). The students are wonderfully caring and willing to learn - and are truly becomnig an academic community that is supportive, not competitive. I doubt that any other group of kids are reminded daily that their teachers loves them, but mine do. Sometimes I look across the room and actually giggle with pleasure - to which the kids grin, say yeah, we know - you love just watching us, and tell me I'm the weirdest teacher they've ever had -and hug me in the halls. I can't say that I am to the point of seeing Mother in their faces, but I am definately aware of Her love spreading and of the tiny miracles I encounter daily. My oddest experience recently was being terribly preoccupied with service one morning last week - we have a huge farm and I was wishing we could donate a massive field for people to come in and grow food for the indigent in our area. That progressed to wishing I could be heavily involved in community service at the school to help our kids understand its importance and decided - all of these going thru my mind like cannon shot during my 12 mniute drive! - to ask a friend I've made at the new school about service oriented clubs. We had NEVER discussed anything like this, but when I asked, she promptly replied that she was under contract to cover ALL community service groups at our school and also had her own group of kids that were allowed to serve by invitation only - and she was resigning from the position that very morning. Within one hour flat of leaving home, the principal had me sign the contract to fill that position. Mother does indeed hear our thoughts and can act more swiftly than a tornado on them - be careful what we ask for, everyone! Mother's a serious - and playful old sweetie!!!! Love, Snehalata Namah Shivayah, dear ones, Think it's so interesting the way that Mother works in our lives. To speak for myself only, this latest "controversy" re: finances has really taken me to a differant level in my experience of Her. The fact that Ammachi is, in my eyes, a mahatma, a self-realized being, a Satguru, an avatar, even, and yet is doing this great work in a human body, that is every bit as fragile as our very own, and subsequently "bound" to experience such human limitations such as fatigue, hunger, ageing and death, ultimately, is remarkable to me. Amma says that this is Her dharma, that She could've left Her body at the moment that She merged with the sublime reality. Yet somehow that reality must be so infinately loving that to be merged in it causes some overwhelming source of compassion to well up inside us, spilling over the edges and driving us to live again in this form for the purpose of uplifting mankind. It is impossible to comprehend why God extends this bit of Him/Herself to us jivas every now and then. Maybe to remind us of our true nature, of the bliss and oneness that is our right as a part of that glorious whole. When I think about moksha, I inevitably think sadhana. I see Amma, and it's almost like the light of a lighthouse as I tumble about in this dark sea of maya. We're all going to merge in That someday! Someday each one of us will not be able to wipe the smile off our face because as we look into the faces of those around us we will see our beloved there, bagging our groceries, or crossing the street. Sadhana is hard. The more you give, the more you have to give, and the less you can stand to torture yourself. As an artist, my pain used to be my muse. As I let go of my pain, I feel less inspired to express, more inspired to act. This has been hard to reconcile. When I recieved my mantra this summer, the woman whom I spoke with told me that from here on, I'd better buckle my seatbelt, because it was going to be a wild ride, but to remember that Amma would be "driving" and would never leave me stranded on this path. So far, that's been pretty darn true. What a wild ride! How does Mother manage to reach across time and space to stir it up here and now? Maybe it's not for me to understand, just to experience. Curious to hear about how She stirs up other jiva soup.... anyone else hanging on for dear life? Have the feeling our Mother is no ordinary guru.... Many blessings, Brianna Sponsor Aum Amriteswarayai Namaha! Ammachi Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 20, 2003 Report Share Posted September 20, 2003 The first year I became an Amma devotee I did not take a mantra, as I was very involved in SRF and had taken vows of loyalty there. But in my heart I was an Amma devotee, and I have to tell you that when that happens it doesn't matter whether you've taken a mantra or not! I didn't understand that the vast changes taking place in my life were due to Her. It just seemed like I had been thrust into some living hell on one level. Of course on another level I was so happy and blissed out that long-time friends in SRF were asking me what was happening, as they could definitley (so they said) see a change. In retrospect I'm a little envious that you were warned, at least. It might have saved me a lot of tears had I known:). Jyotsna --- Dixie Thacker <dixielou wrote: > > - > Brianna Mosteller > Amma > Saturday, September 20, 2003 12:21 AM > sadhana is a wild ride! > > Namaste brothers and sisters, > > Brianna, be assured you are not the only one > hanging on for dear life- my life has been, like > yours, an absolute roller coaster since I met Mother > this summer! THe "unwelcome invitees" that Swami > mentioned when he discussed my mantra have arrived > by the carload, truckfull, and boat load! I lost > all of my income for the entire summer IMMEDIATELY > upon returning from Fairfield (literally found out > the next day!), my husband was forced by our dr. to > take medical retirement and SS has now denied his > case, and my daughter, one of the dearest people in > my life, has again been struggling with rheumatoid > arthritis and the issue of possible lupus (systemic) > has been raised once again. The TRULY odd thing > is that I have not been particularly concerned about > any of these events and I am, or was, by nature, a > classic worrier. The edgy part of my nature seems > to have diappeared..and since it's been months now, > I am hoping it is a true, lasting change. My heart > seems to know that the outcomes will be as they > should be and that's that. > > ON the upside, since meeting Amma, I am also in a > much better teaching environment; last year, I was > at an at-risk, on probation school where I > frequently came home with deep bruises, etc from > breaking up fights and was simply crushed because I > could not find a way to reach the kids there - and > was not alone since that year, we had a teacher > turn-over of 27 out 60!!!! Despite a lack of > seniority that should have prevented me from > transferring anywhere else for several years, I > ended up being given a lovely position at a small > rural school close to my home (the other drive was > 40 minutes; this one is 12 - if Ron has a heart > attack, as is expected by the drs., I have a chance > of getting to him now). The students are > wonderfully caring and willing to learn - and are > truly becomnig an > academic community that is supportive, not > competitive. I doubt that any other group of kids > are reminded daily that their teachers loves them, > but mine do. Sometimes I look across the room and > actually giggle with pleasure - to which the kids > grin, say yeah, we know - you love just watching us, > and tell me I'm the weirdest teacher they've ever > had -and hug me in the halls. I can't say that I am > to the point of seeing Mother in their faces, but I > am definately aware of Her love spreading and of the > tiny miracles I encounter daily. > > My oddest experience recently was being terribly > preoccupied with service one morning last week - we > have a huge farm and I was wishing we could donate a > massive field for people to come in and grow food > for the indigent in our area. That progressed to > wishing I could be heavily involved in community > service at the school to help our kids understand > its importance and decided - all of these going > thru my mind like cannon shot during my 12 mniute > drive! - to ask a friend I've made at the new school > about service oriented clubs. We had NEVER > discussed anything like this, but when I asked, she > promptly replied that she was under contract to > cover ALL community service groups at our school and > also had her own group of kids that were allowed to > serve by invitation only - and she was resigning > from the position that very morning. Within one > hour flat of leaving home, the principal had me sign > the contract to fill that position. Mother does > indeed hear our thoughts and can act more swiftly > than a tornado on them - be careful what we ask for, > everyone! Mother's a serious - and playful old > sweetie!!!! > > Love, > Snehalata > > > Namah Shivayah, dear ones, > > Think it's so interesting the way that Mother > works in > our lives. To speak for myself only, this latest > "controversy" re: finances has really taken me to > a > differant level in my experience of Her. > > The fact that Ammachi is, in my eyes, a mahatma, a > self-realized being, a Satguru, an avatar, even, > and > yet is doing this great work in a human body, that > is > every bit as fragile as our very own, and > subsequently > "bound" to experience such human limitations such > as > fatigue, hunger, ageing and death, ultimately, is > remarkable to me. > > Amma says that this is Her dharma, that She > could've > left Her body at the moment that She merged with > the > sublime reality. Yet somehow that reality must be > so > infinately loving that to be merged in it causes > some > overwhelming source of compassion to well up > inside > us, spilling over the edges and driving us to live > again in this form for the purpose of uplifting > mankind. It is impossible to comprehend why God > extends this bit of Him/Herself to us jivas every > now > and then. Maybe to remind us of our true nature, > of > the bliss and oneness that is our right as a part > of > that glorious whole. > > When I think about moksha, I inevitably think > sadhana. > I see Amma, and it's almost like the light of a > lighthouse as I tumble about in this dark sea of > maya. > We're all going to merge in That someday! Someday > each > one of us will not be able to wipe the smile off > our > face because as we look into the faces of those > around > us we will see our beloved there, bagging our > groceries, or crossing the street. > > Sadhana is hard. The more you give, the more you > have > to give, and the less you can stand to torture > yourself. As an artist, my pain used to be my > muse. As > I let go of my pain, I feel less inspired to > express, > more inspired to act. This has been hard to > reconcile. > > When I recieved my mantra this summer, the woman > whom > I spoke with told me that from here on, I'd better > buckle my seatbelt, because it was going to be a > wild > ride, but to remember that Amma would be "driving" > and > would never leave me stranded on this path. So > far, > that's been pretty darn true. What a wild ride! > How > does Mother manage to reach across time and space > to > stir it up here and now? Maybe it's not for me to > understand, just to experience. > > Curious to hear about how She stirs up other jiva > soup.... anyone else hanging on for dear life? > Have > the feeling our Mother is no ordinary guru.... > > Many blessings, > Brianna > > > > SiteBuilder - Free, easy-to-use web site > design software > > > Sponsor > > > > > > Aum Amriteswarayai Namaha! > > Ammachi > > > > Terms of Service. > > > [Non-text portions of this message have been > removed] > === message truncated === Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 23, 2003 Report Share Posted September 23, 2003 Ammachi, Brianna Mosteller <rubyrapunzel> wrote: > Namah Shivayah, dear ones, > > Think it's so interesting the way that Mother works in > our lives. To speak for myself only, this latest > "controversy" re: finances has really taken me to a > differant level in my experience of Her. > > The fact that Ammachi is, in my eyes, a mahatma, a > self-realized being, a Satguru, an avatar, even, and > yet is doing this great work in a human body, that is > every bit as fragile as our very own, and subsequently > "bound" to experience such human limitations such as > fatigue, hunger, ageing and death, ultimately, is > remarkable to me. > > Amma says that this is Her dharma, that She could've > left Her body at the moment that She merged with the > sublime reality. Yet somehow that reality must be so > infinately loving that to be merged in it causes some > overwhelming source of compassion to well up inside > us, spilling over the edges and driving us to live > again in this form for the purpose of uplifting > mankind. It is impossible to comprehend why God > extends this bit of Him/Herself to us jivas every now > and then. Maybe to remind us of our true nature, of > the bliss and oneness that is our right as a part of > that glorious whole. > > When I think about moksha, I inevitably think sadhana. > I see Amma, and it's almost like the light of a > lighthouse as I tumble about in this dark sea of maya. > We're all going to merge in That someday! Someday each > one of us will not be able to wipe the smile off our > face because as we look into the faces of those around > us we will see our beloved there, bagging our > groceries, or crossing the street. > > Sadhana is hard. The more you give, the more you have > to give, and the less you can stand to torture > yourself. As an artist, my pain used to be my muse. As > I let go of my pain, I feel less inspired to express, > more inspired to act. This has been hard to reconcile. > > When I recieved my mantra this summer, the woman whom > I spoke with told me that from here on, I'd better > buckle my seatbelt, because it was going to be a wild > ride, but to remember that Amma would be "driving" and > would never leave me stranded on this path. So far, > that's been pretty darn true. What a wild ride! How > does Mother manage to reach across time and space to > stir it up here and now? Maybe it's not for me to > understand, just to experience. > > Curious to hear about how She stirs up other jiva > soup.... anyone else hanging on for dear life? Have > the feeling our Mother is no ordinary guru.... > > Many blessings, > Brianna > Hi Brianna. Ordinary guru? Is that an oxymoron? I think there are gurus of various levels of awakening. Amma is about as deep as I've seen, tho I must admit that Hari Das has a similar level of realization, in my opinion. I've been hanging on for dear life as you say for decades, not because of Amma tho, but because of inititation which is really pretty generic if it exists at all. My first one came from Stephen Gaskin, then Hari Das, Muktananda, and now Amma. The first one was in 1976, and my world was torn assunder. Now it's more ordinary, even darshans have an ordinariness about them. Not bragging, just saying us humans are so adaptable we can get used to anything, even riding the tail of a comet. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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