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I have to say that at this stage in my spiritual life,

"efforting" is required to maintain spiritual

practice. It's a tool to get further down the road,

just like God with form is a point of focus required

in the beginning. Just like ritual provides tools for

focusing our devotion.

 

I think once I get to the point where my practice is

"effortless", then that's just where I'll be and I can

let go of that.

 

I've said this before, but I don't anticipate getting

to that point in this lifetime anymore than I

anticipate gaining Realization in this lifetime. In a

sense, I think that frees me a bit from attachment to

that goal... Does that make sense?

 

With love,

Gabriela

 

--- manoj_menon <manoj_menon wrote:

> Ammachi, "pamkowal"

> <kowalsbuff@m...> wrote:

> > Dear Snehalata,

> > My friends and acquaintances think it weird

> of me, but I

> confess

> > to thinking about my future death at least once a

> day, not in a

> > morbid way or as wishful thinking (LOL), but as a

> way of practicing

> > stepping back and resting in the immortal Silence

> which is the true

> > essence of each of us. I use my daily

> contemplation of death as an

> > anchor to help me remember how precious my time on

> earth is to

> > practice resting in the Self, and how vain it is

> to believe in the

> > permanence of anything I might wish to cling to in

> the phenomenal

> > world. I consider my time spent with death in

> this way to be a

> core

> > part of my spiritual practices, one that has

> arisen naturally over

> > the course of many years after experiencing a near

> death experience

> > that was so blissful and filled with unconditional

> Love that it

> > defies description. I consider death a friend,

> not an enemy--a

> > reward for a life well-lived and well-loved. Pam

> :-)

>

> I second that. I do not think it is weird, and do

> consider it as part

> of my spiritual cleansing.

>

> I am aware, atleast once and sometimes more than

> that, of my

> impending (in the near or distant future) death.

> Till sometime back,

> I was detached about it, but of late questions of

> 'what after death

> etc' have arisen in my mind. I take it as a sign of

> either growing

> attachment to life etc, or of lack of trust in my

> Guru's ability or

> intent to take care of me in the afterlife.

>

> Either way, it is not good for me.

>

> I love Amma dearly. I wish I got more chance to

> spend with her, so

> that I could 'centre' myself around Her, and yet be

> able to perform

> my daily duties. I know that left to myself, I could

> not centre for

> nuts, and also intuitively know that the magnetizing

> power of Amma's

> presence or of her disciples can help me

> 'permanently center myself'

> to Her.

>

> I wish I could say I embody the Zen master who

> realizes himself, and

> yet carries the bag of life on his shoulder with a

> smile of total

> surrender to existence's infinite intelligence.

>

> I know I cannot say that. That is my goal though

> .... I hope goals

> are not a deterrent to being so ..... or at arriving

> so. In other

> words, I hope that, by keeping a goal (as opposed to

> a fancy wish or

> a silly desire), I am not 'efforting' to get to the

> effortless state.

>

> Jai Ma!

>

>

 

 

 

 

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