To Prajna on seeing Ammachi

[Guest guest]

Prajna wrote:

 

The miracle was, Amma kept looking at me, right into my eyes. Over and over,

She would draw someone into a hug and gaze at me over their shoulder. I

couldn't believe that it kept happening, and soon I began to feel broken down

by

the gaze of the Mother of the Universe. I ran outside in tears...

 

"Here I am running away from the end of Devi Bhava again as usual. I feel

like a fake, a liar, a thief. How can I pretend to be deserving of such a

relationship with You while I am wearing all these thousands of stupid masks,

and

You see beneath every one of them...Aren't I wasting Your time? I don't

deserve You but I can't tear myself away, so let me be invisible. My love is

obscured by this insincere ego. Don't look at me until my eyes are honest."

 

She came by...reached Her hand out for me and I held it for a few minutes.

Her tiny little hand, so soft and gently rubbing mine, I was on another

planet! I felt so undeserving of such love, such acceptance.

 

Later that night during my flight to Seattle the plane hit some violent

turbulence and began lurching around, dropping dramatically and shaking....I

pulled out my Amma doll and chanted my mantra. Suddenly I remembered Amma

looking

into my eyes and then holding my hand and I just held that memory in my

heart as a deep peace came over me. "Thy will be done, Amma," I said and the

engines went dead...Finally the engines turned back on and we landed safely a

few

minutes later...

 

So, many many blessings. I just feel so grateful and humbled....She is right

here and I just have to stay open. Thanks to all of you for your prayers,

they are working. I hope everyone is well, I can't wait to read other people's

stories about their time with Amma. We are truly blessed.

Dear Prajna ~ what a marvelous and wonderful story, deserving perhaps to be

sent into "Immortal Bliss." I remember once before reading, in the magazine, a

story a long time ago where prayers to Amma kept an airplane safe. There was

a cute drawing of the airplane with Amma gently holding it up by the tail.

: ) Perhaps none of us feel worthy of Amma or Her gaze or Her time or Her

attention ... yet we must be, else why would She be coming to see her

children so often? As you said, Her gazing at you was miraculous, and even

though

She didn't answer your questions directly, it seems She did so indirectly ...

and maybe the answers will continue to unfold as you practice the tool She

gave you ... what a gift! Thank you so much for sharing such vivid experiences

with us. Jai Ma ~ Linda P.S. This just heightens my resolve to get to Santa

Fe to see Her this year, so you have passed along some of Her strenght and

grace to me. : )