To Michele and Ananthasree on Families, Holidays and the question of Amma

[Guest guest]

Michele wrote:

 

....They knew I went off to an ashram

every summer for an extended period of time. It was kind of don't ask,

don't tell. They were much more upset over the fact that I was a

vegetarian! But they weren't very religious, and to them "ashram" meant

nothing...

 

 

 

Dear Michele and Anathasree ~ this reminded me of some incidents my sister

had with our family when we would visit them sometimes at their home in Oregon.

(For some reason, it was never an issue before, perhaps because, before my

parents moved, and we all lived in the same area, they didn't have a "captive"

audience, so to speak.) My sister has tried on and off, ever since she left

home to be a vegetarian. For awhile, she will be, and then, she'll give in to

her craving for a hamburger or pizza with pepperoni. I don't say this in any

way to disparage my sister, since I am not a vegetarian, though I did go

through a very long period without eating any red meat.

 

>From the time she left home, my sister was attracted to the spirituality of

the East. She studied yoga, along with dance, and became very adept at it.

Then, for awhile she was a Sikh, dressed like a Sikh (except for the turban ...

I don't think she could give in to hiding her beautiful long tresses); she

even got married in a Sikh outfit. There is her husband Randy in a suit and bow

tie, and there is my sister in her white dress, long white pants, white

sleeves, etc. In many ways it is a beautiful picture. None of us could attend

her

wedding. It was in the middle of winter in Minnesota. Then she met Amma ...

and that was sort of that.

 

But when we visited my parents, there would be terrible upsets between my

sister and our parents, but mostly my stepfather, when she would buy salad

greens and more varied and no meat oriented food while staying with them. It was

almost as if it was "it's my way or the highway," and since most of you know

my story, in my case, it was the highway. Mostly, it would be my stepfather

making no attempt to understand even a desire on my sister's part to eat

healthily, not to mention avoiding red or other kinds of meat. I could never

understand it. I thought, well, yes, we are visiting, and yes, it is their

home,

but she is not asking them to eat differently or to pay for the food she wants

to eat. My sister would get terribly upset and the extreme anger my

stepfather had over this simple issue.

 

I don't think it was a religious issue with my stepfather. It was more of a

cowboy issue. Well, mam, this is how we folks do things out here, and we'd

sure appreciate your cooperation. (And if you don't, we'll shoot you in the

foot.) Anyway, I just remembered this when reading what Michele wrote.

 

Sometimes parents are totally inexplicable. My therapist in Oregon, who

knows my mother and stepfather pretty well, used to always tell me that just

because people can make babies, it doesn't turn them into good parents....a

lesson I am still apparently learning.

 

Jai Ma ~ Linda