Coming Home to ISKCON

[Guest guest]

---------- Forwarded Message ----------

 

Letter PAMHO:9402132 (100 lines)

Braja Sevaki (dd) TKG (Mayapur - IN)

08-Feb-05 00:56 (19:56 -0500)

Jahnu (Dvipa das JPS) (Mayapur - IN) [26248]

Coming Home to ISKCON

---------------------------

Coming Home to ISKCON

by Dasanudas Vanacari

 

Posted February 7, 2005 on Chakra.org

 

Dear Maharajas, Godbrothers, Mothers and Friends,

 

Hare Krsna! Please accept my humble obeisances at your feet. All glories to

Srila Prabhupada!

 

Those of you who know me, or have been reading my articles published on VNN

and elsewhere, know that in the past I have been very critical of ISKCON. To

you, this announcement may come as somewhat of a surprise. To others, it may

seem trivial--what's the big deal? Well, it is a big deal when one wakes up

to the realization that one has made an enormous mistake, and must

immediately begin the process of correction.

 

To all of you, and especially to the stalwart devotees of ISKCON, I owe my

deepest apologies. I am very ashamed and embarrassed by some of the things I

have said about ISKCON over the last decade. I beg your forgiveness for my

offenses, and your blessings that I may never again become so overcome by

illusion.

 

And to the non-ISKCON devotees and friends who may have read my online

writings over the years, I regret to inform you that I was wrong about many

things, especially my negative attitude towards ISKCON and devotees of

ISKCON. That was a very bad example and I implore you not to follow it. This

is not the place for explaining why I adopted such negative attitudes;

suffice it to say that they seemed like good ideas at the time. But in my

humble opinion, this might be a good time to express succinctly how and why

my attitude has changed.

 

Just after New Year 2005, I was in Washington, DC visiting a friend who I

had been preaching to over the Internet. I was on a japa walk near the

National Cathedral, meditating on the events of the past several years.

Suddenly as if directed by Supersoul, I thought, "But what if my mind is

wrong?"

 

Examining this idea, I was shocked by the growing realization that I had in

fact been misled by my mind into rejecting some of Srila Prabhupada's most

important direct instructions: to remain within the ISKCON society, to

accept the authority of the GBC, and to cooperate together with my

Godbrothers to further the Krsna consciousness movement. I further realized

that, even if I disagreed with ISKCON's management policies or did not like

the service I was assigned, nevertheless it was my duty to accept and

perform them to the best of my ability. My rejection of ISKCON was simply in

illusion created by my fault-finding mind.

 

There is a saying, "You can choose your friends, but not your family." We

may like to think that we chose Srila Prabhupada as our guru. But in

reality, he chose to bring us into Krsna's family. Once we are part of that

family, we cannot simply turn our backs and walk away without being guilty

of gross dereliction of duty.

 

All of us disciples are related through Srila Prabhupada, and that spiritual

family relationship is eternal. We may like or not like our Godbrothers or

their actions, but we cannot resign from the ISKCON family without also

rejecting Srila Prabhupada's direct instruction not to do so. Srila

Bhaktisiddhanta Sarasvati Thakur wrote that we should find the faults in

ourselves, not in others. Our spiritual destination is determined by our own

actions, therefore we should not care what others do, but simply perform our

own duty to the best of our ability.

 

I realized that I should not be critical of my Godbrothers, since I was not

being held responsible for their activities and attitudes, but for my own. A

tremendous weight lifted from my shoulders, and my heart was relieved of a

stressful burden. I immediately walked down to the Metro station and went to

the Potomac ISKCON temple, where I tearfully saw the Deities, ecstatically

participated in the Sunday feast kirtan, and became reacquainted with many

old friends.

 

A short time later I rejoined ISKCON, and am now serving in Srila

Prabhupada's mission once again. It is wonderful to see how the devotees who

remained steady have matured while I was away, and this is very gratifying.

There are still problems in ISKCON, but I feel very optimistic that they can

be resolved. The recent installation of Sri Pancha-Tattva Deities at Mayapur

is a milestone in accomplishing Srila Prabhupada's vision for ISKCON. The

Spiritual Strategic Planning Team initiative is the most exciting new

development, giving me great hope for the future of the society.

 

But even if problems remain, much more importantly, now I am properly

situated in service at the lotus feet of Srila Prabhupada. I am doing my

duty: attending the morning program and performing my assigned service with

humility and enthusiasm. I am doing my best to see the good in my

Godbrothers and brush aside their insignificant faults. After all, they are

also devotees, and also have the right to service in Srila Prabhupada's

ISKCON family. And I have become very skeptical towards my rascal mind.

 

There are literally thousands of devotees in a similar situation to mine:

disconnected and alienated from ISKCON, yet yearning for the safe shelter of

Srila Prabhupada's lotus feet. In the future I think we will see more and

more senior disciples of Srila Prabhupada have similar realizations, and

desire to return to ISKCON to serve his mission. I beg all devotees to clear

their path to reunification with ISKCON, and not to shatter their hearts by

placing obstacles in their path of reconciliation with their eternal

spiritual family.

 

Begging to remain your insignificant servant,

 

Dasanudas Vanacari

(Text PAMHO:9402132) ------

 

------- End of Forwarded Message ------