Prabhu VS Mataji--can we have closure on this?

August 17, 2005

Dear Gauri das prabhu,as well as all maharajas and other prabhus (both male and

female) on this network;

Please accept my humble obeisances. All glories to Srila Prabhupada!

In general, the position you are taking on this issue seems to be reasonable.

Malati prabhu has presented the multiple quotes indicating Srila Prabhupada's

usage of "prabhu" in dealing with his female disciples. Other prabhus have

presented ample evidence that Srila Prabhupada introduced calling women

"mother" or "mataji" into the movement. Clearly, it was not a concoction by

male chauvanists or brahmachari fanatics, etc. However, I was also present in

the movement during the heavy male chauvanism period, and it was clearly very

offensive and destructive, as has been painfully documented by some of my God

sisters joining this discussion. It seems to be primarily an American problem,

as well as incidences in Europe. For some Vaishnavis, the word "mataji" is what

is known, in psychological terms, as a "negative anchor", or something that

immediately draws the mind to painful treatment or events of the past, which

are many in our society. Most of the worst perpatrators of offenses, both

against women and men, from the eras being discussed, are long gone--fallen

sannyasis or others whose whereabouts are completely unknown. Shastra clearly

states that this is the result of Vaishnava apharada, regardles of gender!

There certainly have been many atrocities against common decency in our society

as to how women have been treated, such as the infamous Berkeley SKP group or

the New Vrindavan SKP group, which mixed apparent exploitation of women, even

sexually, with book distribution and "the pick", all in the name of Krishna

consciousness; yet the movement said little because they produced "results". So

many years later we see what kind of "results" came along with the scores and

money galore in terms of pain and suffering. Many devotional lives were

completely destroyed, barely to be recovered in this lifetime, if at all.

Therefore, the best thing is to respect the ladies as they care to be called.

For example, since I know that my God sister Vishaka would be strongly

displeased by being called "Mataji", I would not do it. I call her by her

spiritual name, given by Srila Prabhupada personally. In this regards,

discretion is wise, rather than a flat policy to all. On the other hand, I have

been in India for the past two years, and here, for the vast majority of

ladies, calling them "mataji" would not be an issue, because it is within the

culture. For them it does not trigger trauma or issues of male domination.

Anyways, sensativity is required, along with desa, kala patra considerations.

In any case, I certainly feel this issue is now becoming belabored. Can we

"complete" by agreeing for some time that there is more than one way of

addressing ladies, and that one should be wise and sensative about it? I

request that all the prabhus, both male and female, consider bringing this

discussion to a close for now, as it is becoming rather obtrusive, as different

parties bring forth empassioned oppinions. It is also very time consuming just

attempting to process such a flood of entries on this issue. I have almost been

tempted just to erase entries, regardless of party, which are flooding the

Internet with this subject, in the interest of not getting bogged down by the

weight of so many letters on this one subject (though I attempt to honor them

all by reading, but I don't really have the time for it). All readers please

consider laying the matter to rest for some time, although there are points on

both sides of value. Continued fighting will inevitably lead to Vaishnava

apharada! We can utilize this valuable time reading shastra and chanting the

glories of the Lord, as well as other forms of service. Thank you in advance

for your consideration.

Your servant,

Makhanlal das (ACBSP)

"Gauri (das) TKG (Bhaktivedanta Manor - UK)" <Gauri.TKG (AT) pamho (DOT) net> wrote:

> I am amazed how one can react as feeling offeded when addressed as mother.

That's exactly the point! .....................etc.