Remembering Srila Prabhupada - Realizations

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Realizations

 

 

For a while I was the headmaster of Vrndavana Gurukula

when it was a fledgling gurukula. At that time, Srila

Prabhupada's Vrndavana friend, Bhagatji, was often

going in to see Prabhupada. Bhagatji was also like the

sugar daddy of the gurukula; he was helping me out in

different ways. When he used to go in and see

Prabhupada, I was thinking, "Well, maybe I can go in

with him when he goes." So Bhagatji used to let me tag

along, go in, and just sit in Prabhupada's room and

hear the different talk. A lot of times it was in

Hindi or Bengali, so I couldn't really understand

much, but it was nice to just sit and be with Srila

Prabhupada.

 

Then I got a little puffed up, thinking, "This is

great. Now I have this position. I can go in and see

Srila Prabhupada." With that contamination in my mind

one night, I went in to see Srila Prabhupada while he

was sitting out in his garden speaking to a couple of

Indian guests. As I entered, the Indian guests were

sitting there and Prabhupada said to me, "Go and get

some asanas." I ran out and tried to get asanas, but I

realized, "I don't know where to go to get asanas."

Then I was in a quandary. I didn't know what to do. I

thought "Well, I guess I'll have to go and ask

Prabhupada." I went back in and said, "Srila

Prabhupada?" He said, "Yes?Where should I get the

asanas?" He said, "Go and see Hari Sauri. He will show

you." Then I ran and found Hari Sauri. "Hari Sauri,

Prabhupada wants some asanas for the guests. Can you

give me some?" He said, "I don't think we have any."

Then I said, "Oh no!" He said, "Let me look." Then he

rummaged around in his closet and he came up with one

crumpled-looking asana. I thought "I've only got one

asana. What am I going to do?" Then I went back out

and the guests were getting up to leave.

 

Prabhupada said, "Get them some prasadam." So I ran

back and found Hari Sauri again. I said, "The guests

are leaving. Prabhupada wants me to give them some

prasadam." He said, "All right, here is some

prasadam." Then I came out and gave them each some

prasadam. At this point I was thinking, "Well, at

least I did one thing right." But I still have this

one asana, so I went back to the garden.

 

As I came in, Prabhupada was talking to Bhagatji and

no one else was around. It looked like Bhagatji was

already sitting on something and Prabhupada was

sitting on his own raised seat. I stood there with the

one asana, and I didn't know what to do with it. I

couldn't understand whether Prabhupada meant for me to

use the asana, or Bhagatji, or whether it was for the

guests or what -- I didn't know. I was completely

bewildered. As I came in, Prabhupada said, "I have

several times asked you to get asanas. What is the

difficulty?"

 

I said, "Srila Prabhupada, I could only get this one

asana."

 

Prabhupada replied by just saying, "Hmmm."

 

"Srila Prabhupada?"

 

"What?"

 

"What should I do with the asana?"

 

Prabhupada said, "Take your one asana and sit down on

it!" Then he began to laugh. I felt like a complete

fool as he began to laugh. Bhagatji also started

laughing, and I also started to laugh. I could

understand at that point how I was so puffed up

thinking I was a big personality that I could go in

and see Srila Prabhupada, but he had just revealed to

me what a complete fool I was -- an incompetent

bungler. They were both laughing and I was also

laughing. I couldn't even quite understand why I was

laughing, but somehow or other, by his chastisement in

making me look like a fool, I felt completely

relieved, because I could understand my actual

position. I was just an insignificant, foolish servant

who couldn't do practically anything right. Somehow it

was a great relief just to know that, so I sat down,

and they went on talking.

 

-- Rupa-vilasa dasa Adhikari

 

Rupa-vilasa dasa and Candrika-devi dasi, interview.

 

 

- From the Prabhupada Nectar by HH Satsvarupa dasa

Goswami Maharaj

 

 

 

 

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