comments on the last two issues of BTG

[Guest guest]

Dear Nagaraja Prabhu,

 

PAMHO.

 

I closely read the last two issues of BTG. Deeply satisfying writing by

Navin Jani, Caitanya Caran, Karuna Dharani and many others. Good selection

of pieces! Nice to see an article by Visakha after a long time. The new

photo of you is cool.

 

 

 

 

A few editorial points:

 

March/April issue

-----------------

 

In the Bhag. section, p. 37, the black question-box is missing a hyphen on

"respect-ful".

 

 

 

p. 48 -- Vallabha Vidyanagar feeds needy people in slums.

Jayadvaita Swami just sent me his resolution against these programs,

and it is now being discussed in the GBC meetings.

It should inform your editorial policy if the GBC passes it.

 

 

 

Mantra page: caption should read Rathaytra "parade" not "festival".

 

 

 

p. 51-2 (Caitanya-candra) awkward wording:

 

"can a society be considered *progressed* . . ."

 

 

 

p. 32, column one, more awkward English from Amala Bhakta:

 

"This is most pathetic because is it based on *false-ego* understanding . .

.."

and: " . . . our original *spiritual-world* mentality."

 

This practice is called piling up nouns and using them as adjectives.

 

 

 

The layout of Amala's article could have been improved in two ways:

 

(1) shifting the section on "forgiving" to the beginning of the article;

advantage: text would match the main illustration

 

(2) shifting the picture of Indra and Krishna to the right-hand page;

advantage: the relevant text would be next to the illustration.

 

(You might give these comments to Yamaraja Prabhu.)

 

 

 

Founder's lecture:

 

*rogueism* should have been in quotation marks,

as it is not in most dictionaries. It's a special use by SP.

 

I recommend:

Small spaces on either side of the em-dash between the place and date:

Bombay, India -- March 30

 

Reason: to separate the two, rather than visually connect them.

 

The New York Times uses small spaces on either side of all its em-dashes.

You may not want to go that far. The New Yorker still uses em-dashes the way

you do. But the BBT Brhad-Bhagavatamrta uses spaces on either side of all

its em-dashes. (I suggested it.)

 

 

 

BTG is running the last lines of paragraphs that spill to the next page.

Who but editors will notice?

 

 

You are using lower case pronouns for Krishna, I see.

But "Absolute truth" must have been a typo (in the Ramanuja article).

 

 

 

Ksama recommends a comma after "otherwise" and you should adopt this.

 

E.g.: . . . some text; otherwise, Krishna would have said . . .

or: Otherwise, Krishna would have said . . .

 

It makes the reader pause.

 

 

 

January/February issue

----------------------

 

 

Please do not hyphenate ragged-right type, especially captions:

 

Kurukshe-

tra . . . Ar-

juna . . . chari-

ot . . . de-

sire

 

This is dumbing down. Have confidence in what the experts recommend.

 

 

 

The writer glorifying Vrindavana failed to notice that smoking is not

prohibited. In Tirumala/Tirupati it is. Vrindavan is not so great when it

comes to people showing respect in this way.

 

 

 

Satyaraja's article on the maha-mantra was well designed, and the contents

intersting. I found this sentence awkward and wondered why you did not

improve it:

 

". . . his [sP's] explanations incorporate the context of the vast gamut of

the Vedic teachings . . ."

 

And this made no sense to me as an editor:

 

"it [the maha-mantra] asks only for service to the Supreme Lord and *wants*

nothing else in return." (The *mantra* *wants*? No, the chanter wants.)

 

 

One point in his article on prasadam almost made me puke:

 

"once-a-week wafer"

 

This irreverant outsider view probably offends reverent insiders who are

daily communicants. (Catholicism was my inherited faith.) You should print

an apology from Satyaraja.

 

The lead-in was awkward:

 

". . . gratitude for Srila Prabhupada's gifts grows."

 

The "gifts grows" is a bit of a tongue twister.

 

". . . gratitude for the gifts of Srila Prabhupada grows" is more natural.

 

"Krishnarianism" is not arch. Did Srila Prabhupada use it? It is not in the

Vedabase.

 

(I mailed these comments directly to Satyaraja, too.)

 

Hare Krishna.

 

--ys, td