A friend in maya

[Guest guest]

> Dear Prabhus,and Maharajas

> PAMHO

> AGTSP

> I have a devotee friend that is deeply in maya, and I try to preach to

> him, but he seems so "thick skinned" that nothing gets to him, no matter

> how many sastric quotes I give him.The problem is he has become a

> grhamedhi,and he really fits the catagory of SB 7.5.30.

> Matir na Krsna paratah svato va,mitho 'bhipadyate grhavratanam,adanta

> gobhir visatam tamisram,punah punas carvita carvananam.

> "For those who have decieded to continue their existence in this material

> world for the gratification of their senses,there is no chance of becoming

> KC, not by personal endeavor, by instruction from others or by joint

> conferences.They are dragged by the unbridled senses into the darkest

> region of ignorance, and thus they madly engage in what is called 'chewing

> the chewed'" Since he is a friend I do not like to judge him this hard,but

> it is a fact.He has not much sadhana ,gets up very late, eats in

> restaurants all the time,(not even properly offering the food),watching

> lots of karmi TV and movies, and he does not follow the 1th principel of

> no illicit sex.He tries to engage his wife in illicit sex,(to her

> frustration)and he even made his exwife pregnant 2 years ago.His life is

> such a mess I give up to try to help him, he tells me he want to stay with

> his wife, but next moment wants to move back to the temple as his wife

> does not give in to his illicit sex desires all the time when he wants

> it.He is initiated and his guru is in good standing,but his guru is aloof

> to help him.And I find this frustrating,very frustrating.It seems that

> such association is just bad association, but "otherwise" he is sincere in

> external preaching.I just wonder how to pull this guy out of maya. I

> really would welcome any sincere advise, I try to get him involved in

> Krsna Katha but he wants to involve me in gramya katha(for which I have

> little and no interest).How do you engage someone like that in the

> auspiscious activity of Krsna Katha?????

> YS

> Payonidhi das

-----------------

Dear Prabhu

PAMHO.AGTSP!

 

It is very sad and abnormal how a devotee initiated gets this mentality. It

is lack of proper training association and guidance. It is not his fault but

the illusion that is around us. It is his contamination not only of this

life but dirt brought forward from his past life also. To change the

consciousness is not a easy thing.

 

First he himself has to have a desire to give up bad association. Secondly

it requires surrender. Thirdly the austerity to follow the principles.

Unfortunately he does not have any of these. For such a person any Krsna

Katha you present he will not accept.

 

I noted that he requires improvements on sadana,rising early, on how to

avoid watching Karmi movies or Tv, avoiding restaurants, on offering and how

to avoid illicit sex.

 

The best thing would be to engage him in a very deep service twenty four

hours of the day. Give him something to do. Do not let him to be free even

for a few minutes.The service should be within your presence. Do not send

him out anywhere. I do not know if he is willing to do some service. I have

an experience that some work will make him be occupied.The service could be

of his taste. If he develops a taste of service he will improve in aspects

of sadana, rising early, karmi movies and Tv. Give him some Krsna Katha

videos to watch only if he is interested. Do not force him too much.

 

The other thing is to give him prasadam offered by you. Do not put him into

too many rules and regulations. If he wants to go to a restaurant request

him to eat only vegetarian food at least by saying Sri Vishnu three times.

 

On subject matter of illicit sex life, only present him the instructions of

Srimad Bhagavatam about the the life you may get next and the severe

punishment given by Yamaraja. Quote some stories. If you have a movie about

this show him.

 

You also said "otherwise" he is sincere in external preaching.Then you

should study what he likes to preach. Only discuss to him on that subject

matter. We also have to study his weakness. Always attack him at that time.

 

May be in this life he may not succeed but let us hope that at least he gets

human life next by taking prasadam.But let him not fall down to lower

species. Let us hope to at least save him by prasadam. May be he can go BTG

also.

 

The most important solution ultimately, is to pray to Srila Prabhupada and

The Deites on our behalf for his spiritual life.