Sruti Kirti - Prabhupad - Remarriage

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On July 8, 1999 Sruti Kirti Prabhu, Srila Prabhupad's trusted personal

servant for many years, was giving a 'Remembering Srila Prabhupad' talk in

the New Raman Reti (Alachua) temple. He promised to tell a story that he

had never told before. I am here retelling it (I had made a video tape of it)

 

The following took place in New Dwaraka in Dec of 1973. One mataji (Sruti

Kirti did not mention her name, so I will also not reveal her name) who was

23 to 24 years old, her devotee husband had been killed, [if I recall,

around this time there was a devotee in New Dwaraka who was caught having

an affair with another devotee's wife, and he was shot and killed by the

other devotee. I did not ask Sruti if this was the same incident, but I am

quite sure it is]. The mataji was now without husband. She had a brother

who was a devotee, but still, the mataji was in anxiety because she knew

the philosophy, that a woman is to be married only once. She knew,

philosophically, she was to remain a widow for life. But she was still

very young. 23, 24. No children. She was in anxiety. Sruti Kirti knew her

and her brother well and so they discussed it. She wanted to speak to SP

about her situation.

 

Sruti Kirti explained the situation to SP and SP agreed to see her. The

mataji, her brother and Sruti Kirti went together to his room.

Prabhupad spoke first. He said, "So, you are wanting to marry again?". She

said, "No, no, Srila Prabhupad. Not now. I have no one in mind. But, I was

wondering, I am so young, so sometime in the future, would I ever be

allowed to remarry again?"

Prabhupad said, "I would not prohibit you". [ I am noting here that the

mataji was young and had no children ].

Then Srila Prabhupad went on to say, "But, what is the guarantee that the

next one will be any different then the last one?" Sruti Kirti said Srila

Prabhupad went on speaking at length, saying, "In your society it is so

difficult. The men, they do not understand Dharma. And the women, they do

not understand Chastity." Sruti Kirti said SP quoted some Sanskrit verses

and said, "It is very difficult. It is not such a good idea".

 

The mataji had nothing more to say, but her brother wanted to explain

further. He said, "It is not that she wants a husband right now, or even

children, its just that a woman requires protection".

Prabhupad, one by one, looked at her and said, sadly, "So, you are not

protected?" He looked at her brother, "You are not protected?". He looked

to Sruti Kirti, "You are not protected?" "Krsna is always protecting -

but you must have so much faith in Krsna. Faith in the instructions of

Shastra, and faith in the guru."

Sruti Kirti said they stopped discussing at that point, they had no where

else to go with the conversation. He said they all 3 realized they really

had no strong faith in Krsna's protection. And they saw that Srila

Prabhupad's faith was real.

The mataji was ashamed that she had even approached Srila Prabhupad to ask

for such a thing [Just see, in 1973 ISKCON devotees knew these things,

remarriage, were against Srila Prabhupad's desire, against shastra, against

what Krsna teaches and what we know will please Him. The devotees knew

that well then, but today, it seems to be up for interpretation, up for

debate - or completely lost - my added opinion ]. The mataji then put on

white. But, she wanted some way of letting Srila Prabhupad know she had

taken up the mood of widow. She didn't want SP just to see her from a

distance, but wanted to stand directly in front of him in white, so that he

would know her mind and conviction.

On Srila Prabhupad's next visit to LA she devised the Escalator plan.

When SP arrived at the airport all the devotees would follow behind him as

he walked through the airport. Part of that walk was to come down an

escalator. So, the mataji placed herself at the bottom of that escalator,

wearing her white sari. It worked. when SP got to the escalator all the

hundreds of devotees around him and to pile 2 to 3 on each step behind him.

And at the bottom of the escalator was the mataji standing with a young 4

year old girl (not her own child) who had a flower garland to give SP.

Coming down the escalator he saw the mataji in white, and when he reached

the bottom, he smiled at her, giving his blessings for her proper choice

and determination. Then the 4 year old girl went to put the garland on SP,

who had stopped just at the bottom of the escalator, and bent over to

receive the garland. Immediately behind SP, on the last steps of the

escalator, were Srila Prabhupad's secretary and personal servants and

several sannyasis, who had no where to go as Srila Prabhupad had stopped at

the bottom of the escalator. And immedately behind those devotees were

another several hundred devotees ecstatically chanting, coming down the

escalator steps - with no where to go . Prabhupad's secretary and

sannyasis turned around and started waving to the devotees to stop and to

back up on the moving stairs. There was no place to go. Meanwhile the 4

year old girl was having a hard time getting the garland over SP's head,

and SP was patiently standing there, bent over, without a care in the

world, taking his time waiting for the girl to get the garland on him...

Meanwhile his secretary was frantically yelling and waving at the devotees,

trying to hold back a moving wall of hundreds of devotees who kept piling

up with no where to go. Finally, the girl got the garland over SP's head

and he offered respects and moved on.

 

 

End of story, told by Sruti Kirti and now retold by me...

 

But, I again want to point out that devotees in 1973 knew well what was

expected of them by SP concerning this topic of remarriage. And even

though SP at first said he would not prohibit her from marrying again, 2

things are there. One is she was young and without child, and secondly,

after saying that, he elaborated why it was not good for her to remarry,

and he made clear his real desire and the actual postion of shastra. What

was the guarantee the next husband will be any better?

 

And, it is most interesting that SP noted that in the West the men do not

understand Dharma, and the women do not understand Chastity. That, he

said, is the difficulty here. And those 2 points, I am trying to

understand and trying to preach and trying to get others to understand.

But it seems so hopeless at times. As Srila Prabhupad himself said, in the

West, most just don't understand these things... And few want to even try

to learn. But those of us who do want to learn, who do have some

understanding, we cannot give up. We are have to carry on, to carry the

torch light and keep making progress... That will prove our faith in Krsna.

 

 

 

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