ISKCON Social Model

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> > > > Is it not that the wife must be inferior in all respects to the

> > > > husband?

> > >

> > > Could you unpack this statement prabhu? What do you mean by 'all

> > > respects'?

> >

> > From the story of Sita devi we learn that She had to be married to

> > someone who was superior to her in physical strength. This, and many

> > other examples, suggests that husband should be superior to his wife in

> > as many aspects as possible.

> >

> >

> > > Also, how in this day and age would you ascertain this to be

> > > the case?

> >

> > Dharma means the intrinsic nature of something. Dharmic laws are

> > tailored according to this eternal nature and are thus eternally

> > applicable.

>

>

>

> My understanding is that the wife should be equal in quality with the

> husband. But by "equal" I don't mean in the post-modern feminist way or

> that she can bench press as much as her husband can. But rather she is

> equal in adherence to dharma. The girl should be as well trained in

> performing her dharma as a woman as the man is in performing his dharma as

> a man. For example she should be as faithful to her husband as the husband

> is faithful to his guru. (It would be very instructive for any disciple to

> study what are the duties of a chaste wife in regard to her husband, most

> of them can be applied in relationship to the guru.) So the real equality

> is that they should be equal in their adherence to Krsna's Vedic culture,

> though that adherence will be different because men and women have

> different prescribed duties (dharma) to perform for pleasing Krsna.

>

> Sita Devi has been mentioned. It would be very instructive for anyone

> interested in advancing in Vedic culture to read the complete unabridged

> versions of the Ramayana (and Mahabharata) as it gives many instructions

> by example of how most of the relationships in life are to be performed.

> The relationship between father and son, between husband and wife, between

> older and younger brother, between King and his subjects, between

> Brahmanas and Kshatriyas, between followers of VAD and those outside of

> VAD, etc.

>

> Though Sita was a suitable wife for Rama because She was His equal in

> regards to feminine perfection as He was in masculine perfection this

> didn't mean that She was His EQUAL going around killing demons. She was

> always submissive to Lord Rama etc. There are many beautiful instructive

> passages in the Ramayana about how They dealt with each other. Once after

> meeting with Agastya muni in Dandakaranya Rama was asked to go to

> Janasthana to kill all the Raksasas who had colonized the area. On the way

> there Sita wanted to advise Rama that in Her opinion they should not kill

> the Raksasas for various reasons. Did she start nagging Rama? Did she say

> I am your wife and equal so you have to listen to Me? Did she become a

> pushy loud mouthed woman? No, none of the above. In a very humble and

> touching way she first stated that since she was a woman and subject to

> female frailties she probably should not say anything in this way she was

> very self effacing and humbly put Her case to the Lord. And what was

> Rama's response? Did He just brush Her off as a silly woman or an idiot?

> Did He belittle what She had to say? No, none of the above. He was

> genuinely appreciative of Her advice as it indicated that She was thinking

> of His best interest and that She loved Him. Then He said Her advice was

> wrong and that He would kill the Raksasas. The whole exchange between

> these two Supreme Transcendental Personalities is the epitome of Vedic

> culture and sets the ideal for others (us) to follow.

>

> It is texts like Ramayana and Mahabharata which were read by one and all

> which have had the most lasting efffect in maintaining Krsna's Vedic

> culture.

>

> So to reiterate the point, when the sastras speak of the prospective bride

> and groom being on equal level (for ideal marriage) what is meant is that

> they are both at the same level of expertise in the execution of their

> respective dharmas. Not the artificial equality promulgated by feminism,

> the bane of Vedic culture.

 

slaghyah strinam varah smrtah

 

>>> Ref. VedaBase => SB 9.14.21

 

My Sanskrit is not exactly up to the proper standard, but I beleave this

means that varah (husband) is smrtah (should be, is known to be) to be

slaghay (superior) to his strinam" (wife).

 

In the purport Srila Prabhupada says, "The combination of male and female is

worthwhile if the qualities of both are on an equal level."

 

So my understanding is that husband should be superior to the wife in

phisical strength and age for example. This we learn in the pastime of Sita

Devi lifting lord Siva's bow.

 

That the wife should be equally as qualified as her husband you have already

explained.