= :-))

[Guest guest]

DID THEY SAY THAT?

 

Sign in a Laundromat:

AUTOMATIC WASHING MACHINES:

PLEASE REMOVE ALL YOUR CLOTHES WHEN THE LIGHT GOES OUT

 

Sign in a London department store:

BARGAIN BASEMENT UPSTAIRS

 

In an office:

WOULD THE PERSON WHO TOOK THE STEP LADDER YESTERDAY

PLEASE BRING IT BACK OR FURTHER STEPS WILL BE TAKEN

 

In an office:

AFTER TEA BREAK STAFF SHOULD EMPTY THE TEAPOT AND

STAND UPSIDE DOWN ON THE DRAINING BOARD

 

Outside a secondhand shop:

WE EXCHANGE ANYTHING - BICYCLES, WASHING MACHINES, ETC.

WHY NOT BRING YOUR WIFE ALONG AND GET A WONDERFUL BARGAIN?

 

Notice in health food shop window:

CLOSED DUE TO ILLNESS

 

Spotted in a safari park:

ELEPHANTS PLEASE STAY IN YOUR CAR

 

Seen during a conference:

FOR ANYONE WHO HAS CHILDREN AND DOESN'T KNOW IT,

THERE IS A DAY CARE ON THE FIRST FLOOR

 

Notice in a field:

THE FARMER ALLOWS WALKERS TO CROSS THE FIELD FOR FREE,

BUT THE BULL CHARGES

 

Message on a leaflet:

IF YOU CANNOT READ, THIS LEAFLET WILL TELL YOU HOW TO

GET LESSONS

 

Sign on a repair shop door:

WE CAN REPAIR ANYTHING. (PLEASE KNOCK HARD ON THE

DOOR - THE BELL DOESN'T WORK)

 

Spotted in a toilet in a London office block:

TOILET OUT OF ORDER. PLEASE USE FLOOR BELOW

 

In a Dry Cleaners shop:

DROP PANTS HERE