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A lawyer is a man who helps you get what's coming to him.

 

A lawyer is someone who prevents somebody

else from getting your money.

 

A lawyer is someone who protects you from

other members of his profession

 

I've got a brilliant lawyer. He can look at a contract

and in less than a minute tell you whether it's oral or written.

 

Old lawyers never die, they just lose their appeal.

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