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Recently, people entering a contest submitted their new

theories, which could relate to ANY subject.

 

Below are the winners:

 

4th RUNNER-UP

Probability Theory

 

If an infinite number of rednecks riding in an infinite

number of pickup trucks fire an infinite number of

shotgun rounds at an infinite number of highway signs,

they will eventually produce all the world's great

literary works in Braille.

 

3rd RUNNER-UP

Bio-Mechanics

 

Why Yawning Is Contagious: You yawn to equalize the

pressure on your eardrums. This pressure change outside

your eardrums unbalances other people's ear pressures,

so they then yawn to even it out.

 

2nd RUNNER-UP

Symbolic Logic

 

Communist China is technologically underdeveloped

because they have no alphabet and therefore cannot use

acronyms to communicate technical ideas at a faster

rate.

 

1st RUNNER-UP

Newtonian Mechanics

 

The earth may spin faster on its axis due to

deforestation. Just as a figure skater's rate of spin

increases when the arms are brought in close to the

body, the cutting of tall trees may cause our planet to

spin dangerously fast.

 

HONORABLE MENTION

Linguistics

 

The quantity of consonants in the English language is

constant. If omitted in one place, they turn up in

another. When a Bostonian "pahks his cah," the lost R's

migrate southwest, causing a Texan to "warsh" his car

and invest in "erl" wells.

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<<Recently, people entering a contest submitted their new theories, which

could relate to ANY subject.>>

 

Hey prabhuuus... I got a lot of prizes! Where are my Samosas?? :)

 

> Below are the winners:

 

<<4th RUNNER-UP Probability Theory>>

--------------------

Text PRONTO:114979 (4 lines)

Avadhut

29-Jul-98 17:30 -0400

Jokes

Shoot-out

---------------------------

If an infinite number of Texans riding in an infinite number of pickup

trucks fire an infinite number of shotgun rounds at an infinite number of

highway signs, they will eventually produce all the world's great literary

works in Braille.

(Text PRONTO:114979) ------

 

 

<<3rd RUNNER-UP Bio-Mechanics>>

--------------------

Text PRONTO:114980 (10 lines)

Avadhut

29-Jul-98 17:33 -0400

Jokes

Texan Science

---------------------------

Why Yawning Is Contagious: You yawn to equalize the pressure on your

eardrums. This pressure change outside your eardrums unbalances other

people's ear pressures, so they must yawn to even it out.

 

--------------

 

<<& 1st RUNNER-UP Newtonian Mechanics>>

 

The earth may spin faster on its axis due to deforestation. Just as a figure

skater's rate of spin increases when the arms are brought in close to the

body, the cutting of tall trees may cause our planet to spin dangerously

fast.

(Text PRONTO:114980) ------

 

 

3 out of 5!

Not bad at all!! :))

Hope to do better next year.

 

yfs

Ava

 

(And for one more time:

NOT "AVI" as in Microsoft's "Audio Video Interface"

but "AVA" as in Sri Caitanya's "Nityandanda Avadhut")

 

> 2nd RUNNER-UP

> Symbolic Logic

>

> Communist China is technologically underdeveloped

> because they have no alphabet and therefore cannot use

> acronyms to communicate technical ideas at a faster

> rate.

>

>

> HONORABLE MENTION

> Linguistics

>

> The quantity of consonants in the English language is

> constant. If omitted in one place, they turn up in

> another. When a Bostonian "pahks his cah," the lost R's

> migrate southwest, causing a Texan to "warsh" his car

> and invest in "erl" wells.

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