'God' and machine language

[Guest guest]

(No offenses here. It's just a silly joke.)

 

In the beginning, 'God' created the bit. And the bit was a zero.

 

On the first day, he toggled the 0 to 1, and the Universe was. (In those

days, bootstrap loaders were simple, and "active low" signals didn't yet

exist.)

 

On the second day, "God's" boss wanted a demo, and tried to read the bit.

This being volatile memory, the bit reverted to a 0. And the universe

wasn't. Thus 'God' realized the importance of backups and memory refresh,

and spent the rest of the day (and his first all-nighter) reinstalling the

universe.

 

On the third day, the bit cried "Oh, Lord! If you exist, give me a sign!"

And God created Ver 2.0 of the bit, even better than the original

prototype. Those in Universe Marketing immediately realized that "new and

improved" wouldn't do justice to such a grand and glorious creation. And so

it was dubbed the Most Significant Bit (MSB). Many bits followed, but only

one was so honored.

 

On the fourth day, 'God' created a simple ALU with 'add' and 'logical

shift' instructions. And the original bit discovered that by performing a

single shift instruction, it could become the Most Significant Bit. And

'God' realized the importance of computer security.

 

On the fifth day, 'God' created the first mid-life kicker, rev. 2.0 of

the ALU, with wonderful features, and said "Forget that add and shift stuff.

Go forth and multiply." And 'God' saw that it was good.

 

On the sixth day, 'God' got a bit overconfident, and invented pipelines,

register hazards, optimizing compilers, crosstalk, restartable instructions,

microinterrupts, race conditions, and propagation delays. Historians have

used this to convincingly argue that the sixth day must have been a Monday.

 

On the seventh day, an engineering change introduced Windows into the

Universe, and it hasn't worked right since.